Baretta: Carla

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Baretta rescues Carla from her mob family, the Feds want her to roll over on her syndicate family and put her into the witness protection program, while Tony just wants her for himself. Add a recap »

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Writers:: Pat Fielder Richard Bluel

Director:: Alex March

Stars:: Tom Ewell (Billy Truman); Robert Blake (Det. Tony Baretta); Edward Grover (Lt. Hal Brubaker [ 2-4 ])

Recurring Role:: Michael D. Roberts (Rooster)

Guest Star:: Jeannie Bell (Midge); Chuck Hicks (Peters); Vera Lockwood (Vera Trancata); George Loros (Vito Trancata); Adrienne Larussa (Carla Trancata); Marki Bey (Totsey); Cliff Emmich (Cabin Proprietor); Victor Rendina (Joseph Trancata); Lisa Moore (Rouge)

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Baretta: Harrigan over at Ross's he ain't got no answers. That's what the bartender is supposed to have is answers. Maybe I wasn't drunk enough.
Billy: Hmm you're drunk enough, drunk enough to see everything upside down.
Baretta: No I ain't Billy, I'm seein' 'em right side up. The world is a drag my friend. From the womb to the tomb, it's a drag.
Billy: Sure for anyone who sees himself as a loser. You know if you were the kind of chump who would cry because he lost her, you're not the guy I know. I thought you'd be smilin' because at least you had her for a little while. See that's what separates the folks in this world, see the glass the losers see it as half empty and the winners see it as half full.
Baretta: And I'm dramatic.
Billy: You don't have to play sad and you don't have to have a broken heart, go out and let someone show you how to drink. Now let an old master take over for you. edit »
Rooster: Now where is my bread, lookin' in my breadbox don't see no bread.
Baretta: Here's your bread man.
Rooster: You know I had bad vibes, if the local Godfather finds out that I'm holding his private possession, you know whose brains they're gonna slaughter don't you. You're own partner El Guyo, Rooster, hmm.
Baretta: I will have her outta here tomorrow night El Guyo, yur hospitality is tearin' me up.
Rooster: I hear ya, I just want you to know that my rump is on the line brother. See if you want to play you got to pay. That's all, don't need nobody to stick me up like this man. edit »
Baretta: Charm we're very very heavy on charm in this place, one thing we are loaded with in this entire hotel is charm, beautiful smells and charm. Now look over there, see that chair, is that the most charming chair you ever saw in your whole entire life, you're right it's a dump. You heard her dummy it's a dump. What happened to the other room, the Bluebird Suite?
Billy: The plumbing is temporarily distressed.
Carla: It'll be fine, really.
Baretta: You heard her, it's charming, it's beautiful. It'll be just fine. What are ya waitin' for a tip?
Billy: Tip! The only tip I get around here is on some elderly three legged horse.
Baretta: You sir are an elderly three legged horse.
Billy: Yeah, I can still carry my weight.
Baretta: Hit the road and take this guy with ya. And don't get him drunk! You see Billy is always gettin' the bird drunk, I'm tryin' to get the bird into AA, except if I do that then Billy will have nobody to drink with. And if he don't have nobody to drink with then he's gonna have a nervous breakdown. And if he has a nervous breakdown then I ain't gonna have nobody to talk too, and I don't even know what your name is yet.
Carla: Carla, Carla Fisher.
Baretta: Ah ha, that tells me that you have your husbands name on account of you're a spaghetti bender like I am. You know how I know, well aside from being a brilliant detective, and havin' incredible deductive powers, when a guy is walkin' down the street and is ready to blow his brains out cuz he don't know what he's doin' on this earth and he looks up and sees terrific Sicilian eyes lookin' at him, that's gotta mean spaghetti or maybe he gots the swine flu or somethin' like that. Not too funny, but I got a little smile outta ya, a little one, little one. That's good now we got that what else you need. Your Food, you wanna sleep what? edit »
Baretta: They ain't gonna getcha, and the Feds they ain't gonna getcha and you can take that to the bank. edit »