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Becker: (to Jake and Reggie) Get a life! Even just one for the two of you... you could share it.
(edit) Lynda: What did I do to make Steve stop loving me?
Linda: Well, you slept with all the guys in his band.
Lynda: I was trying to take an interest in what he does. (edit) Lynda: It was Steve's idea to have a three-some. It's not my fault I liked it!
Margaret: Why are you telling me this?
Lynda: You said you cared.
Margaret: No, I said TELL someone who cares.
(edit) Becker: Why does everything happen to me?
Margaret: It's a shame that dead man isn't around to feel sorry for you. (edit) Margaret: We got a call about one of Dr. Heisman's patients, a Mr. Tompkins.
Becker: What's his problem?
Margaret: He's dead.
Becker: Well, I can't fix that. (edit) Linda: She could help out. She could do half of my work.
Margaret: Doing half your work is what you do.
(edit) Margaret: Heisman's on vacation and you agreed to cover for him.
Becker: Well, why'd I do that?
Margaret: So that one day you can go on vacation.
Becker: I don't go on vacation.
Margaret: Well, then you screwed yourself.
(edit) Linda: The only way I could calm her down was to make her a coffee surprise. That's two parts coffee, one part Jack Daniels.
Becker: Well, what's the surprise?
Linda: It's really five parts Jack Daniels.
(edit) Margaret: Just for today, you are Beth.
Lynda: I don't like the name Beth.
Linda: I do, can I be Beth?
Lynda: I want to be Beth too.
Margaret: You can't both be Beth.
Linda: Why? We're both Linda.
Lynda: Let's pick our own names.
Linda: I want to be Margaret.
Lynda: No, I want to be Margaret.
Margaret: I want to be dead. (edit) Reggie: When it comes to magazines, I'm a slut. (edit) Billy (after seeing his grandfather, after being told he was dead): I can see dead people. (edit)

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After Billy is told his grandfather is dead, his grandfather walks into the house. Billy utters a phrase, "I see dead people", a phrase made famous in the movie "The Sixth Sense", starring Bruce Willis and Haley Joel Osment. (edit)