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At the Parkway Medical Center, society psychologist Dr. Eric Techman is finishing up with (unseen) patient. We hear the patient's whispery voice say "I hate you. I mean I really want to kill you". Techman says the patient is the second one that day to say that, and ends the session early to make a call, telling the patient as he/she leaves to "have terrible dreams". As soon as the patient has left, Techman goes to the waiting room and tells his secretary Janet Fielding to call the police immediately. Janet, however, is frantically finishing a phone call. She tells Techman that there's been an accident and her mother may be dead in a car crash, and leaves.
Burke is resting in his back yard when Peggy appears. He can't quite place her face or where they met (keeps calling her Alicia). She says she's his "landlady" and is going to take him to her beach house so he can get some much needed sleep. Just then Techman calls, saying he's heard good things about Burke. He tells Burke that one of his patients is a homicidal maniac who plans to kill him and he wants to get a court order for commitment immediately. Burke keeps trying to get Techman to tell him who the patient is, but just as he gets ready to do so, a hand holding a gun appears in the doorway of Techman's office. Three gunshots ring out and Techman is killed, shot in the back.
At the crime scene, some paper burned in a bowl is discovered. Burke questions Janet, who is completely flustered and upset. She's a bit scatty anyway. The phone call about her "mumsy" (she obviously has some issues with her mother) was a false alarm; she can't even tell Burke whether the caller was male or female, just a whispered voice. She gives Burke a list of all of Tuesday's patients, who will be also be seen on Thursday. Burke arranges to have the story of Techman's death kept out of the papers and tells Janet to tell any patient who calls that the doctor is home sick. He wants time to assess the patients before anyone knows about the murder. Janet asks if he shouldn't tell Mrs. Techman the same thing. She says Techman was like a father to her; Burke guesses correctly that she hated her father. Burke teases Tim for not behind ahead of him for once, and for not having already figured out who the killer is. He tells Tim "there's hope for you yet."
When Burke rings the bell, Betty Techman calls out jokingly, thinking that her husband has forgotten his keys again. When Burke says he's from the police, she asks if "that boy" is in trouble for drunken driving again - her husband won't like that. As she invites Burke in, she asks him to be careful where he walks - "Step on a crack, break your husband's back". She says she's superstitious (maybe); it had all started as a joke, but Techman took it personally as a reflection on him. She tells Burke she doesn't know any of her husband's patients but has heard all about what's wrong with them. When she finally figures out why Burke has come, she says she's shocked but not grieved. She and Techman didn't really like each other. But, Betty says, people can not like each other without resorting to murder, even though she realizes she's a suspect. Burke asks her to also tell anyone that the doctor is ill. She thinks this puts her at risk, so Burke arranges for a police guard. As he leaves, Burke wonders how Techman could possibly not have liked his wife. Betty says her husband was perfect, except for one flaw - her.
Tim and Les are tracking the whereabouts of the patients. The possible suspects have been narrowed down to five: Gigi String is a stripper who only gives one performance a night, Dorrie Marsh is a teen movie star, Larry Forsythe is called by Tim "boy drunk with an oil well for a mother", the mother is Helen Forsythe, and Dominic Farrow, "boy klepto". Tim disappointedly guesses (correctly) that he and Les will interview all the men and Burke all the women. Just then a call comes in of a burglary at the home of Helen Forsythe. Burke decides to go there and let Tim and Les see Gigi. Les shakes his head at an obviously excited Tim.
At the Purple Pussycat, Tim and Les pose as reporters. Two strippers come along, doffing clothes. They tell Tim that Gigi will only see people fully clothed in the main room. Burke calls to tell them to arrange protection for Janet.
Texan millionairess Helen Forsythe is insulted that none of her jewels or other precious belongings seem to be missing from the breakin. How could someone not want her jewels? Burke notices that a gun is missing from her late husband's collection and Helen says it was a .45. Realizing who Burke is, she asks why he's there. He responds
WE MILLIONAIRES MUST STICK TOGETHER - BURKE'S LAW.
Helen complains that Techman has spoiled her life and thinks he's really responsible for all his patients' problems. She only went to see him because she thought he was bad for her son, and soon she was "examining my persona". Techman told her she was full of violence. She says Larry was a sweet boy until he started seeing Techman and is now getting meaner every day. Dorrie Marsh has been driven "round the bend" by the doctor. It seems Dorrie was the first to go to Techman, then got Larry interested. She and Larry are in love, Helen tells Burke. Burke asks Helen how violent can she get and Helen tells him to ask her doctor.
Gigi (real name Myrtle) tells Tim and Les that Techman told her that she was a split personality - the lady who wants to keep her clothes on and the stripper who wants to take them off - and she can't be both. Tim, who's studied psychology, questions her. Gigi thinks Techman should pay her instead of the other way around. She tells them she quit therapy with Techman that day, but then says she quits every day.
Tim goes to provide protection for Janet, thinking it will be easy. He gets clubbed over the head at her door. Janet finds him, brings him into her house and calls the police. She's all dolled up, but tells Burke that's just what she does to relax at home when "mumsy" is out of town. Burke notices a cigar in the ashtray and thinks a man has been there. Janet tries to pretend that the cigar is hers but get sick when she smokes it. She finally admits that Dominic Farrow was there, but wonders why Burke would guess that she was in love with him. Just then a call comes in that Betty Techman has been shot and that Dominic was picked up outside the house.
Dominic denies shooting her and no gun has been found. Betty is a bit mad at Burke because of the shooting. She admits she foolishly opened the back door when she heard a noise, thinking it was the cop on guard duty. Dominic tries to run upstairs to see Techman; he says that's why he came in the first place. Betty tells Burke she knows him from a photo her husband sent her of the two men skiing at Sun Valley. She tells Dominic that Techman is ill and resting and tells him to go home, asking Burke if that's OK because Dominic couldn't possibly be guilty.
Since there's no evidence, Burke agrees. He wonders why she said before she didn't know any of the patients. Betty tells Burke Dominic was her husband's ski instructor before he was a patient and followed him to L.A. from Sun Valley for treatment. She definitely warms up to Burke and asks him back when the case is over.
Les is worried because Tim is missing. He got word that Tim went looking for Larry Forsythe in a Santa Monica bar - alone. Word comes in that Dorrie Marsh has attempted "suicide" - she went into a pet shop and tried to buy an asp, then phoned in her own suicide report. Burke thinks both Dominic and Gigi are hiding something. Tim calls - he's caught both Larry and Dorrie as they tried to steal a Cessna to run away. Larry has shot up the airport with a .45. Dorrie, recognized by a fan, has tried "suicide" again, by eating a window box full of petunias. Burke reads that last week she tried to hang herself with her bikini.
At the airport, Dorrie denies the suicide attempt, saying it was made up by a reporter. Calls it all a gag. She and Larry were running off to get married in Vegas. Larry says the gun isn't Helen's. Larry doesn't even know what a Cessna is and Tim asks how they planned to go, if Larry can't fly a plane. Larry replies: "I don't know how to do anything, I'm rich." He figured he'd just pick it up as they went along. Tim wonders who it was who disapproved of their marriage, and finally hits on the fact that Techman was the only one. Larry tells Dorrie he'd die for her; she reminds him that she would have been on the plane too and he says, well, did she want him to die alone?
Thursday, Burke plans to take Techman's place in the office as each patient shows up, to see what will happen and if one patient doesn't show. Janet doesn't think it's a good idea and says she's scared. Burke tells her just to press the buzzer on her desk and they'll all come running. In the office, Tim wonders if the killer might not be Janet. Burke wonders if there might not be more than one killer. Tim thinks it can't be Larry and Dorrie; Burke accuses him of being sentimental. Just then the buzzer rings frantically. When they rush out, Janet tells them she was just testing.
The first patient, Gigi, makes a threat to the back of who she thinks is Techman. Then she thinks Burke is Techman's replacement. When she finds out who Burke is, she asks why he's wasting his time there - it takes sincerity to murder and she's very insincere. She says she's finally decided to quit stripping and go to Notre Dame for an education. Burke tells her Notre Dame is just for men - she says "It was!"
Dorrie is 40 minutes late for her appointment. Janet says she never misses an appointment or is late, so Burke tells Les to start looking for her.
Dominic arrives next and doesn't seem too upset to learn that Techman is dead. He tells Burke he never stole anything, it was Techman who convinced him that he was a kleptomaniac and that he needed therapy. He asks Burke if there's anything he could do in the police force. Dominic says Techman told him his wife was eccentric when Burke mentions all her superstitions. Dominic talks about "poor Janet" who probably will have no job now. Burke catches him pocketing his lighter. Dominic wants to take Janet to lunch, to which she eagerly agrees. As they leave, he reminds Janet to be careful - "step on a crack, break your husband's back" and they go out laughing.
Dorrie is still missing and Janet is late coming back from lunch.
Larry shows up to apologize to Techman. He tells Burke he couldn't "find her". Burke thinks he means Dorrie, but he means his mother. He wanted to tell everyone that he and Dorrie got married. She comes in and tells Burke that Larry "kidnapped" her. Burke asks them about their honeymoon and Larry asks Dorrie what country she'd like him to buy her a hotel for their honeymoon. When she says the "cheapest" one, Larry brags to Burke that's she's quite a girl, already saving him money.
Janet returns in tears, having broken off her "engagement" to Dominic. She says that Techman was right, when she's happy she get too bossy. Tim offers to take her to her car so she can go home - she's a wreck.
Alone, Burke reenters the office to find Helen with a gun. She says she just wanted to scare Techman, to see what he'd do. She's shocked to realize Techman is dead, and that it looks like the burglary was done to frame her as the murderer. She tells Burke that obviously she's not as tough as she thought she was. Techman was so mean to her and she just took it and then went home, cried, and hurt herself. She says she hated Techman but doesn't believe in murder. She hopes Burke cracks the case. He then realizes who the killer is and leaves her. Helen says she's going to stay there for awhile, her hour isn't up.
At Techman's house, Betty is dressed to go out, with her arm in a sling. She says the cop on guard stepped out. Burke doesn't believe her and sees a cigar in the ashtray. He tells Tim to search upstairs for the cop and for Dominic. He accuses Betty of killing Techman and shooting herself. Tim finds Dominic upstairs, the cop unconscious, and six suitcases packed and ready to go. Dominic says he's in love with Betty. Dominic stole the gun and Betty shot her husband. Burke realized that both Betty and Dominic misquoted the saying, "Step on a crack, break your mother's back", saying "husband" instead of "mother".
Dominic tries to run. Burke says "Oh, come on, you've been watching too much TV. I have a gun and Tim has a gun". Dominic comes back and gives up. Actually, Burke doesn't have his gun with him. Betty says they were going to go to Switzerland, where Dominic would teach her to ski. Burke tells Tim to book them, he's going to get some sleep.
Back in the yard, Burke is dozing when Peggy comes back and says "guess who" again. When he guesses Alicia again, she gets mad and leaves, he keeps guessing until he wakes up completely and sees only Henry standing there. He gives Henry a push into the pool.