Writer:	David Mandel, Kevin Smith
Director:	Chris Bailey
Star:	Jason Mewes (Jay),  Brian O'Halloran (Dante Hicks),  Jeff Anderson (Randal Graves),  Kevin Smith (Silent Bob)
Recurring Role:	Kevin Michael Richardson (Announcer / Desmond Pfeiffer),  Diana Devlin (Various),  Charles Barkley (Himself),  Alec Baldwin (Leonardo Leonardo)
Guest Star:	Dan Etheridge (Mr. Plug),  Bryan Johnson (Steve-Dave),  April Winchell (Various),  Walt Flanagan (Walt the Fanboy),  Jeff Bennett (Various),  Sam Gifaldi (Various),  Elon Gold (Various),  Dana Gould (Various),  Nakita Hopkins (Various),  Kerri Kenney (Various),  Matt Maher (Various),  Brian Posehn (Various),  Lauren Tom (Various)

The episode was originally going to play 1st, then it got switched to 5th after a test audience rejected it. But when they show was canned, it never got played. This episode did finally air on December 22, 2002 during a marathon on Comedy Central. (edit) LOOK HARD: When the transmission is going through the sewer, you can see the Phantom Of The Opera in the sewer. (edit) Originally, the script called for Jay & Silent Bob to be drug dealers, just like in the movie. But after the network got wind of it, they shut it down and told them they had to be "mischief makers." (edit) Full episode title: The Pilot Or Leonardo Leonardo Returns And Dante Has An Important Decision To Make. (edit)

(Leonardo unveils the Quicker Stop)
Dante: This doesn't bode well.
Randal: "Quick-er Stop." I don't get it.
Jay: Now that's the ugliest damn bong I've ever seen. (edit) (Leonardo unveils Leonardo Tower)
Jay: It looks like a big bong!
(Walt Flanagan's dog walks by)
Jay: Hey, that looks like a big bong too! (edit) (Dante and Randal are walking up a wall in the style of the Old Batman TV Show)
Randal: We're almost there.
(potted plant shatters on the surface they're walking on)
Dante: Why are we walking like this?
(camera turns to reveal they are not walking up, but from right to left) (edit) Leonardo Leonardo: Do you like my desk? I built it myself. And I have all these pieces left. (edit) Randal: Who the hell is Leonardo Leonardo?
Reporter: (on TV) Who the hell is Leonardo Leonardo? It is a question asked by the poorly educated, whose fingers lie far from the pulse of this little community.
Randal: You're poorly educated.
Dante: You're talking to the television. (edit)

When they say previously on "Clerks" at the beginning of the episodes and show color bars, the joke is that there is none due to the fact that it's the first episode. (edit) This episode features the first Batropes and flowerpot crashing bit, which becomes a running gag. (edit) The sign outside the town hall says "Town Meeting Canceled For Emergency Town Meeting." (edit) After "Phase One is complete", tumbleweed rolls past Federal Penitentiary, Le Cafe Francais Chinese Food, Modern Eunuch, Ye Olde Bookstore, and eventually, the Tumbleweed Store. (edit) LOOK HARD: There is an "orphan's top 10" section at the Quicker Stop book store. (edit)

Talking Heads
Dante: Same as it ever was...
This is a constantly repeated line from the Talking Heads' 1980 hit song "Once in a Lifetime." (edit) Midnight Cowboy
Randel: I'm walking here.
The famous Rat Rizzo line from Midnight Cowboy (1969). (edit) Marathon Man
Randel: Is it Safe?
This is a quote from Marathon Man (1976). (edit) The Secret Diary Of Desmond Pfeiffer
While seeking inspiration for thwarting Leonardo's plans, Dante and Randall take time out to watch "UPN's hit show" The Secret Diary Of Desmond Pfeiffer. Perhaps it was foreshadowing, like "Clerks," "Desmond" had a short life -- only four episodes were ever aired. The series centered on Desmond (Chi McBride from Boston Public), who was President Lincoln's right-hand man, and they used Lincoln to poke fun at the Clinton administration. The show came under fire from many African American groups and was quickly jerked from the airwaves. Desmond was again referenced in episode 3. Just to note, the "P" in "Pfeiffer" was not silent on the real series. (edit) Father's Day
Dante: And that Billy Crystal/Robin Williams movie . . . This is a reference to the film Father's Day (1997). (edit)