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Score: 8.7 Great 51 votes

Traffic School

Episode Number: 43    Season Num: 2    First Aired: Monday April 20, 1998    Prod Code: 9721

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Quotes

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Timmy: (to Frank and Marie about leaving Robert at a gas station) Remember? A great family vacation, going to see the Grand Canyon. Frank stops for gas and you all leave when Robert's still in the men's room?
Frank: How would you know? You weren't there.
Ray: We got a real battle of wits going on here. (edit)
Marie: Come on, honey. You can practice on me, dear. Give me one of your routines.
Robert: What?
Marie: One of your traffic things. Come on! Let's just say I'm a crazy driver, (turns her attention on Frank) Shut up, Frank. (edit)
Robert: I just got my first student evaluations today.
Marie: Yeah? What did they say dear?
Robert: Oh, you want to know what they said? Okay, ma, here's what they said. (Robert opens up his binder and flips through a few pages) "This class is a sure cure for insomnia. Next time, just, please, take away my license." (edit)
Ray: You were neglected. Try being smothered.
Robert: I used to pray for smothered.
Ray: You want smothered? How about at school when Mom became cafeteria monitor to make sure I ate all my food and kept my sweater on and sat with her?! (edit)
Timmy: (to Frank) Remind me never to drive with you, ya crazy old bastard! (edit)
Ray: Okay, Robert, the thing I said about lighten up—this is a little too light. (edit)
Frank: (reading student evaluations) 'After 10 minutes, I wanted to take the officer's gun... and end my misery'. (edit)
(Robert is talking through his dummy, Traffic Cop Timmy)
Timmy: Let's see. Marie, is it? What's the first thing you do in your car before you drive off.
Marie: Well, you check your rear-view mirrors.
Timmy: Good.
Marie: And, make sure you're wearing your seatbelt.
Timmy: Anything else?
Marie: Um, no. That's it.
Timmy: That's it? (turns to Robert) She thinks that's it. (turns back to Marie) How about making sure your firstborn son is in the backseat before driving off from a gas station in New Mexico!
Marie: Robby, that was so long ago!
Robert: Hey, I'm not the one who cares. (looks at Timmy)
Debra: Uh-oh. (edit)
Debra: (to Robert about him teaching trafic school) All you just need is some practice.
Robert: It's not the kind of thing you can practice. It's all about relating to people.
Frank: You're a dead man. (edit)
Robert: How about when you used to go to school and mom would follow you there!
Ray: What? That was mom?! (Robert nods) Oh, my God! The crazy tree lady! I used to have nightmares about her!
Robert: When was the last time you had one?
Ray: Last week! (edit)

Trivia

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In earlier scenes Timmy is seen with a rather long neck, but when Marie discovers his head in the freezer in the closing segment, the neck is quite short to allow the head to fit in. (edit)
This episode's lunch special is ham, beans, cole slaw, carn bread, and what looks like stuffing. (edit)

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Episode Vital Stats

 
Episode: Traffic School
Season Number: 2
Episode Reviews: 2
Episode
Score:
8.7 Great 51 votes
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