What to Watch This Weekend: The Season Finales of Banshee and Black Sails, the Debut of NBC's Crisis, and a Very Wicked Once Upon a Time

By Andy Daglas

Mar 14, 2014

What to watch on Friday, March 14...

After Ben assumes control of the law firm, he hires Keegan to bumble his way to a win in “Staple Holes.” Out of court, Keegan’s dalliance with the mayor’s wife hits a speedbump.

8:30pm, ABC
The Neighbors
New babysitter Rachel Dratch catches Larry’s eye in “A Night In (Lou Ferrigno’s Hibachi) Heaven.” Next door, Mary and Debbie’s attempt to spice things up with a date night goes askew.

9pm, CBS
Hawaii Five-0
“Ma lalo o ka ‘ili (Beneath the Surface)” sends the squad searching for a young girl taken from her home after her father was shot. Off the beat, Danny works to reconcile his parents and Jerry tries to crack the code found on McGarrett’s champ box.

9pm, NBC
An ancient conflict flares up in Portland in “Once We Were Gods,” drawing Nick, Hank, and the Wesen Council into the mix. Meanwhile, a Resistance ally safeguards Adalind, and Sgt. Wu tries to regain his bearings.

9pm, Fox
In “Vets,” a trio of veterans (Stacy Keach, Dean Stockwell, and Barry Bostwick) gives the Hill boys a worrisome glimpse into their own futures. Hopefully that glimpse at least includes three or four more seasons for this show from the Powers that Be at Fox. Is that so much to ask?

9:30pm, Fox
Raising Hope
With Fox’s other warmly entertaining yet low-rated  sitcom now officially in its final weeks, please join the Chance family for “Dinner With Tropes.” Virginia is ambivalent about a possible promotion, while Jimmy and Sabrina fear the worst when Hope is unfazed by her pet fish’s demise.

10pm, NBC
Will’s trial gets underway in “Hassun,” and it’s immediately muddled by zany mishaps like a bailiff being murdered copycat-style. Jack’s guilty conscience continues to take its toll, while all of Will’s allies and enemies face misgivings about the case.

10pm, Syfy
Peter and the Vectors have one more trick up their collective sleeve to disseminate the virus in “Black Rain.” As the CDC scientists put the finishing touches on a cure, they face a fresh assault from Ilaria Corporation’s mercs.

SEASON 2 FINALE, 10pm, Cinemax
“Bullets and Tears” pits Lucas and Carrie against Rabbit and his nasty Rabbiteers in the sophomore season climax, while Rebecca demonstrates her loyalty to Proctor.

– Kid Cudi, Jason Brown, and the Chop it Up panel on The Arsenio Hall Show, Syndicated, check local listings
– James Franco, Andy Cohen, and Jake Bugg on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, 11:35pm, NBC
– Bill O’Reilly, Nick Griffin, and The Dough Rollers on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35pm, CBS
– From South by Southwest, Lil Wayne, Willie Nelson, and Los Lonely Boys on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 11:35pm, ABC
– Christian Slater, Neil deGrasse Tyson, and Andy Daly on Late Night with Seth Meyers, 12:35pm, NBC
– Amy Smart and author Denisa Mina on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37am, CBS


What to watch on Saturday, March 15...

10:30am, The Hub
My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
Pinkie Pie’s sister, the titular “Maud Pie,” visits Ponyville and proves quite different from what her friends expected. For one thing, as the spelling of her name should indicate, she’s not actually a brassy 1970s feminist icon.

MOVIE PREMIERE, 8pm, Lifetime
The Grim Sleeper
Dreama Walker portrays an intrepid L.A. reporter pursuing the case of the eponymous serial killer, who terrorized a community in the 1980s and returns to his slaying ways after a 14-year layoff. According to the logline, it's that hiatus which inspired the killer’s nickname, so don’t expect to see haunting scenes of some masked dude nodding off mid-stab. Macy Gray and Ernie Hudson also star.

9pm, BBC America
Ripper Street
After escaping from his paddy wagon in “Dynamite and a Woman,” an Irish bomber gets back to what he does best: bombing. That sets the local constabulary to doing what they do best: nabbing blokes who go around detonating Parliament bigwigs.

SEASON 1 FINALE, 9pm, Starz
Black Sails
The pursuit of the Urca proceeds apace, but Eleanor’s own plans hit choppy waters. Elsewhere, past demons prey on Bonny’s and Rackham’s minds.


What to watch on Sunday, March 16...

7pm, Fox
Bob’s Burgers
Snubbed from the guest list of a classmate’s Bat Mitzvah, Tina nevertheless puts in an appearance as part of the Bob’s Burgers catering crew. She may not get to dance the horah in "Mazel Tina," but at least she’ll still get to engage in primo boy-watching, and what more does the eldest Belcher truly need?

NEW TIME PERIOD, 7:30pm, Fox
American Dad
Mark Cuban hatches a dastardly plot at 10,000 feet in “Introducing the Naughty Stewardesses,” and only an incognito Stan and Francine can nip it in the bud. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve engage in some sort of Face/OffCyrano de Bergerac mash-up that I can’t even begin to explain.

8pm, ABC
Once Upon a Time
Emma and Henry return to Storybrooke in “Witch Hunt,” but their welcome-back party is marred by the latest curse afflicting the town. As Emma and Regina partner to figure out who’s working the malicious mojo, scenes from the Fairy Tale Land that was reveal how Regina and Robin Hood tangled with the Wicked Witch.

9pm, Lifetime
Army Wives: A Final Salute
The stars and producers gather to reminisce about the drama’s recently concluded seven-season run.

9pm, Fox, FX and others
Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey
If you’ve ever wondered about some of the things that molecules do, I have a hunch that “Some of the Things That Molecules Do” will hit the sweet spot for you. Among this week’s other topics are canine breeds, the human eye, and the Hall of Extinction (all of which, incidentally, are composed of molecules).

9pm, CBS
The Good Wife
In “A Few Words,” Alicia is tapped to deliver the keynote address at an American Bar Association conference in New York. While there, she and Cary maneuver against Diane and Will to network with a Manhattan rainmaker (Jill Hennessy).

9pm, ABC
Bellamy works to have Jacob’s tomb exhumed in “Unearth,” leaving the Langstons in an uncomfortable spot. Meanwhile, Resurrectee #2 Caleb re-acclimates with the Richards family.

9pm, Showtime
“The Legend of Bonnie and Carl” finds the most sociopathic Gallagher bonding with a fellow rabble-rouser of the opposite sex. Elsewhere, Fiona’s criminal record impedes her job search, Lip and Amanda grow closer, Sheila returns home with a mission, and Mickey tries to ballast a mercurial Ian.

9pm, AMC
The Walking Dead
The group settles into tranquil new surroundings in “The Grove,” and even begins to contemplate a return to normalcy. When their hopes are inevitably and violently squashed, it will be Zombie Warren G. Harding leading the charge for that extra dash of irony.

Bo and Tate hit Atlantic City in hopes of scrounging up some cash in “Beginner’s Luck,” but instead find a mother and ailing child in need of aid. Meanwhile, the FBI’s intervention throws a wrench in Skouras’s plans to capture the runaway superkid.

Gillian Anderson and Dermot Mulroney star in this thriller in which a diabolical genius abducts the children of politicos, diplomats, CEOs, and other highfalutin’ nabobs. With leverage over the country’s biggest power brokers, what manner of mischief might the maniacal mastermind manage?

10pm, ABC
Besieged by ever more dangerous blackouts, Emily must seek help from someone she’s previously wronged in “Struggle.” Elsewhere, Victoria takes drastic measures to rid her present of someone from her past.

10pm, Showtime
House of Lies
In “Zhang,” Lukas leads Marty and the gang through the nickel tour of his old stomping grounds. Back at the office, Monica turns to Kaan and Associates for assistance with a new food product.

10pm, HBO
The Marnie Performance Alert level hits a solid “orange” in “I Saw You,” which promises an open mic night and all the associated cringe comedy you could imagine. Meanwhile, Elijah helps Hannah with an assignment, and Jessa goes job-hunting.

SEASON 3 FINALE, 10:30pm, Showtime
NBC expects Matt to audition for the lead in its new drama pilot, which may or may not be the latest Dick Wolf spin-off, Chicago Librarians. Elsewhere, Beverly tries to rein in Sean with interest in The Opposite of Us ticking up.


And now, let’s all vote to crown the What to Watch Tonight Episode Title of the Week!

  • Comments (355)
Add a Comment
In reply to :
  • Brady571 Mar 18, 2014

    + Believe, Continuum, and Resurrection

  • Xtremej15 Mar 17, 2014

  • AaronSmith13 Mar 17, 2014

  • haroven Mar 17, 2014

    Yeah I hafta say I'm pretty surprised Continuum didn't cop a mention. Being not very big on the glossy TV celebrity spruiking industry I kinda rely on TV.com to keep me up with the play on what's being broadcast. Sheer luck a friend mentioned its return at lunch today.

  • Sanity_Bleeds Mar 17, 2014

    Its only airing in Canada right now, gotta wait a little while longer before Syfy airs it in the States. As if REAL health care wasn't reason enough to storm the border already...

  • DustinEsquire Mar 17, 2014

  • blue2610 Mar 17, 2014

  • bkyle2429 Mar 17, 2014

    plus the Amazing race

  • NickVandervil Mar 17, 2014

    I think someone is slipping. TONS of stuff missing from the schedule for Sunday, and I have noticed a lot of missing things for other days as well.

  • Sanity_Bleeds Mar 17, 2014

    More often the shows the get missed either have not yet aired in the US, or air on a network that over half the country doesn't even get.

  • NickVandervil Mar 17, 2014

    Well, cosmos is missing and it plays on Fox. Amazing Race is missing and it plays on CBS...

  • Sanity_Bleeds Mar 18, 2014

    Cosmos is likely a poor misstep, Amazing Race is just them sparing us the harsh reminder that it's still on the air and that people actually still watch it.

  • NickVandervil Mar 18, 2014

    You can make excuses all you like, the fact is there is quite a few things missing from the schedule on a daily basis...

  • ShaunLaurel Mar 17, 2014

  • sroberts461 Mar 17, 2014

  • See More Comments (325)