What to Watch Tonight: Rectify, Defiance, and Black Jesus

By Andy Daglas

Aug 14, 2014

What to watch on Thursday, August 14...

7pm, Cartoon Network
Adventure Time
Finn and Jake’s parents track a woods-dwelling threat in “Joshua and Margaret Investigations,” which I imagine will be Adventure Time’s “Pine Barrens.” Then in “Memories of Boom Boom Mountain, Finn is on a mission to help everybody in town on a particularly troublesome day.

The Birth of the Tramp
This feature chronicles Charlie Chaplin’s career and the creation of his most famous character, the Tramp, who celebrated his centennial birthday this year.

8pm, Syfy
In “Painted from Memory,” Doc Yewll endeavors to keep anyone from learning her ghastly secret. It's true, she’s never seen The Wire, and she doesn’t need the whole town pestering her about it and trying to shove their DVDs at her all the time, thank you very much.

Gang Related
Daniel hopes to forge a deal between Javier and Lavar Quintel on this, the day of his wedding. Meanwhile in “Malandros,” Chapel and the team pursue murder suspect Matias south of the border.

Last Comic Standing
One of the three remaining finalists will become the eponymous Last Comic Standing tonight. Judges Roseanne Barr and Russell Peters also take the mic, as does the winner of the show’s online comedy competition.

9pm, USA
“Where Is My Mind?” finds a stressed-out Rush diving into his work to take his mind off things. Do you think it’s especially hard for a man named “Rush” to chill out? Everywhere he goes, people always crying out, “Hey, Rush!” and he’s all, “I know you’re saying my name and not commanding me to accelerate my pace but subconsciously it still feels like a lot of pressure!” That must suck.

9pm, ABC
Rookie Blue
While helping tenants vacate a condemned housing complex in “Moving Day,” Andy and Chloe come upon a man suffering grievous injuries. Searching for his attacker leads them to a diabolical criminal enterprise... though it turns out that the victim didn’t double-cross any of the crimelords or anything, he just pissed them off by admitting he’d never seen The Wire.

9pm, Sundance
Daniel grapples with a tough decision in “Strange Foreign Lands,” and his trusty Magic 8-Ball is being stubbornly unhelpful. Elsewhere, Ted Jr. faces his frustrations while Amantha frees herself of hers.

10pm, IFC
Garfunkel & Oates
A competition to pen a song for a TV show pits Riki and Kate against their adult-film doppelgängers in “Rule 34.” In other creative setbacks, a corporate gig fails to synergize proactively with the duo’s brand alignment and core competencies. (That means it goes badly. Thanks, business school!)

10pm, Sundance
The Honorable Woman
In “The Killing Call,” Nessa’s security adviser traces a lead on the missing boy. Meanwhile, Ephra makes a shocking discovery that could shake the family to its core: You guessed it, Nessa hasn’t seen The Wire either. People get busy, y’know!

10pm, FX
“The Playdate” finds Russ and Lina muddling their way through an uncomfortable get-together among kids and other parents. Also unable to endure the company of another human: AJ, who turns to Jess for help making a houseguest scarce.

10:30pm, FX
You’re the Worst
FX’s celebration of the dull agony of socialization continues in “Sunday Funday,” in which Gretchen, Edgar, and Lindsay rope Jimmy into their weekend plans.

11pm, Cartoon Network
Black Jesus
While Jesus and the gang locate just the spot for their garden in “Fish and the Con Man,” Vic takes measures to get Our Hero ousted from the neighborhood.

11pm, Showtime
7 Deadly Sins
Men who wish to be women and people who treat dolls as human babies are among those profiled in “Envy.” Not featured: those people who keep insisting you have to watch The Wire and then add, “Oh I’m sort of jealous of you, I wish I could watch the whole thing for the first time again.”

– Aubrey Plaza, Kesha, and Carmen Esposito on Conan, 11pm, TBS
– Fergie on Chelsea Lately, 11pm, E!
– Sylvester Stallone, Eve Hewson, and the winner of Last Comic Standing on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, 11:35pm, NBC
– Taylor Swift, Boy George, and Derek Waters on Late Night with Seth Meyers, 12:35pm, NBC


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