What to Watch This Weekend: Portlandia and Enlightened's Season Finales and the Series Premieres of Red Widow and Vikings

By Andy Daglas

Mar 01, 2013

What to watch on Friday, March 1...

8pm, The CW
Acting on a tip from Shadowbot, Nikita and Owen head to New York to nab Ari in “With Fire.” He has vital information about a terrorist threat—but it comes with a hefty price tag. In non-potentially-catastrophic developments, Alex and Owen’s relationship awakens the green-eyed monster in Sean.

9pm, Disney
Gravity Falls
Let’s be honest, it’s stuff like tossing an exclamation point onto the title “Bottomless Pit!” that gives this show that extra dash of madcap charm. Also, the fact that it’ll do an episode where Dipper, Mabel, Stan, and Soos regale one another with stories to pass the time while plummeting through the infinitesimal void of said bottomless pit.

9pm, Starz
Spartacus: War of the Damned
As fissures in the rebel camp deepen in “Blood Brothers,” Spartacus plans a gambit that could turn the tide of the conflict. Crassus realizes he must make his own move quickly, with both the return of a rival and the end of the series fast approaching.

10pm, Cinemax
A homeless Rebecca turns to Proctor for help rebuilding, while Gordon digs into Carrie’s hidden past in “We Shall Live Forever.” Carrie’s got problems of her own, though, as she tries to help Lucas move forward and later deals with a worrying visit from one of Rabbit’s goons.

10pm, IFC
The mayor’s failure to pay the electric bill plunges the city into darkness, as “Blackout” closes out the third season. In the teeth of more than one kind of power vacuum, can the plucky Portlandians band together to save their beloved burg from chaos?

– Bill O’Reilly, Abigail Breslin, and The Mavericks on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35pm, NBC
– Highlights from earlier in the week on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 11:35pm, ABC
– Mariah Carey, Billy Eichner, and Prince on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:37am, NBC
– Trace Adkins and Naya Rivera on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37am, CBS


What to watch on Saturday, March 2...

10:30am, Cartoon Network
Young Justice: Invasion
Red Arrow’s friends try to pull him back from the brink in “Intervention,” which will be especially awesome if Wally zips over to How I Met Your Mother first to borrow their special "intervention" banner. (Look, Cartoon Network has all but given up on releasing episode summaries for this show. I work with what I’ve got.)

9pm, BBC America
Ripper Street
In “A Man of My Company,” Reid investigates the murder of an inventor whose new ship engine could elevate the fortunes of a struggling shipping line. Could his demise be connected with an international shipping magnate, newly arrived in London to sew up his acquisition of the company?

11:30pm, NBC
Saturday Night Live
Kevin Hart hosts, while musical guests Macklemore & Ryan Lewis attempt to dispel the increasingly likely theory that they’re a stealth Lonely Island creation.


What to watch on Sunday, March 3...

All-Star Celebrity Apprentice
Donald Trump, America’s least-favorite conspiracy-mongering blowhard, returns to re-examine the business acumen of such Celebrity Apprentice veterans as Stephen Baldwin, La Toya Jackson, and Dennis Rodman. The competition’s first event asks the question at the crux of so many classic marketing case studies: Would you eat a meatball crafted by Gary Busey?

Red Widow
Radha Mitchell stars as Marta, an ordinary stay-at-home mom whose life is thrown into disarray when her drug-trafficking husband is murdered. With the Russian mob and the feds closing in around her in the two-part premiere, Marta must delve into the underworld to square her husband’s debts and protect her family.

9pm, AMC
The Walking Dead
“Clear” finds Team Lockdown badly outmatched by Team Suburbia in the arms department, so Rick leads a quest to stock up on weapons, power-ups, heal potions, and if they get really desperate, that super-expensive DLC item Glenn’s been clamoring about.

9pm, CBS
The Good Wife
Eli and Elsbeth square off against the Justice Department on two fronts, which means “Going for the Gold” promises another edition of unfettered Carrie Preston vs. Kyle MacLachlan joy. On the campaign trail, Jordan preps Peter to debate Maddie.

9pm, Showtime
As Frank sobers up for his court appearance, Fiona comes to a decision about the Gallagher clan’s future in “A Long Way From Home.” Elsewhere, Debbie and Carl adjust to life in foster homes, and Sheila may have to surrender Hymie when Timmy Wong and his mother come calling.

9pm, HBO
Hannah tries to disguise her book-writing stress when her parents come to town in “It’s Back.” Charlie’s success launching an app company surprises Marnie, along with everyone else wondering who the market is for an app that probably replicates suffocating clinginess. Adam, meanwhile, meets a flamboyant woman in AA (guest-star Carol Kane) who fixes him up with her daughter.

As “Agent of Change” winds up the second season, Amy’s role in the looming Abaddonn exposé comes to light, prompting a surprising response from Helen, a confrontation with Charles Szidon, and possible blowback for Tyler and Krista.

SERIES PREMIERE, 10pm, History
Why wait until March 31 to get your fix of hirsute folk in circa-Dark Ages garb impaling one another? History Channel’s first fully scripted series—from creator Michael Hirst of The Tudors fame—kicks off with “Rites of Passage,” as young Norse warrior Ragnar (Travis Fimmel) endeavors to win the approval of his local chieftain (Gabriel Byrne) and become Scandanavia’s Next Top Berserker.


And now, let’s all vote to crown the What to Watch Tonight Episode Title of the Week!

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