Breaking Bad: The 12 Worst Things to Ever Happen to Jesse Pinkman
Editor's Note: We've now updated this to include Season 5B, up to but not including the finale.
When Breaking Bad first premiered, it was very much the story of Walter White. But once series creator Vince Gilligan realized the asset he had in Aaron Paul as Jesse Pinkman, the show started to put just as much focus on Jesse's journey as it did on Walt's. Mr. Pinkman became the moral compass of a show that's very rarely had such a thing (in ABQ, all moral compasses seemingly point straight to hell).
Of course, Jesse's growing importance to the narrative never stopped Gilligan and the rest of the creative team from treating Jesse like a piece of crap. Which is why I was able to create this list of the 10 worst things to ever happen to the poor guy.
12. He fell backwards off a roof that one time
And he wasn't wearing pants.
11. He was forced to spend a day with ATM-stealing meth heads and care for their neglected child
This is also the moment when the world decided to collectively hug Jesse Pinkman and never let him go.
10. He fell through the roof of a Port-a-Potty
Gravity made Jesse its bitch.
9. His parents kicked him out of their house
Absolute worst freaking parents on the planet, am I right? They even took the phone!
8. He didn't listen to Walt about the acid and really f*cked up his bathtub
You should have listened to Walt's advice about the plastic tub, man.
7. His friend Combo was shot by a 10-year-old
6. Hank beat the shit out of him
I suppose this item could have just been titled, "All the times anyone beat the crap out of him."
5A. Walt poisoned Jesse's girlfriend's son Brock to manipulate Jesse into helping him kill Gus
And that plant was in Walt's backyard the whole damn time.
5B. And then when he finally realized the truth about Brock's poisoning and tried to burn down Walt's house in revenge his plans were thwarted by Hank
Damn it, Hank!
4. He was held hostage and forced to cook meth for Todd because Todd has a crush on Lydia
Todd is the worst (but also the best because he spared Jesse's life?).
3. He was forced to watch Todd kill Andrea as punishment for trying to escape
She might not have been well-loved by fans, but she didn't deserve that. And neither did Jesse.
2. He was forced to kill Gale in order to save Walt
The aftermath was probably the worst we've ever seen the poor kid prior to Season 5B. (And if your heart isn't already aching for the kid, just re-watch Jesse's confession in "Problem Dog.")
1A. His girlfriend died in bed right next to him after choking on her own vomit, and Walt did nothing to save her
That was way harsh, Tai.
1B. And then Walt told Jesse the truth about Jane out of anger and spite and Jesse completely lost the will to live
F you, Walt.
Holy shit, that was depressing. Here, this should cheer you right up.
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