M*A*S*H

No Laughing Matter

Season 9, Ep 13, Aired 2/16/81
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  • Episode Description
  • Hawkeye wagers that he can go a full day without a wisecrack, and Winchester finally confronts the colonel who exiled him to the 4077th.

  • Cast & Crew
  • Elias Davis

  • David Pollock

  • Burt Metcalfe

  • Robert Symonds

    Colonel Horace Baldwin

  • Mae Hi

    Korean Woman

  • Fan Reviews (1)
  • No Laughing Matter

    By secandScholar, May 18, 2012

  • Trivia & Quotes
  • Quotes (13)

    • Potter: (about Reader's Digest) I own their entire abridged library. Mildred can never figure what they leave out in those.
      Hawkeye: My personal favorites are "The tale of a city" and "The two musketeers".

    • Hawkeye: (trying not to joke about the crazy things happening around him) It's like I'm dying of thirst and I can't unscrew my canteen! Laughter laughter everywhere, and not a joke to...(stops himself)

    • Charles: The injustice of it all! To banish me to this--vermin preserve!--just to avoid paying me the six hundred dollars he lost me in a cribbage game! Ergo--when he arrives, I shall perform elective surgury on the first organ that presents itself!

    • Klinger: Begging your pardon, Major. Charles: What is it, you meddling little Bedouin?

    • Winchester: (to Col. Baldwin) I've groveled! I have endured your insufferable cribbage playing! I have kissed your brass! But I WILL NOT, even for a return to that pearl of the orient Tokyo, lie to protect you while destroying a friend's career!

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    Notes (1)

    • Burt Metcalfe received an Emmy nomination for Outstanding Directing in a Comedy Series.

    Allusions (1)

    • Hawkeye says, "Laughter, laughter everywhere, and not a joke to ..." but he can't finish the line because it would be a joke. He is paraphrasing Samuel Taylor Coleridge's poem "The Rime Of the Ancient Mariner" and its well-known line, "Water, water everywhere, nor any drop to drink."

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