Penn & Teller: Bullshit!

Family Values

Season 3, Ep 2, Aired 5/2/05
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  • Episode Description
  • Explores the family structure that is reported on by the Media and politicians that a traditional family must be a Father, Mother, Two kids and a Dog. Featured experts include: Brian Brown- Himself, Executive Director of the Family Institute of ConnecticutMichael Medved- Himself, Nationally Syndicated Radio HostTom Leykis- Himself, Radio HostStephanie Coontz- Herself, Author and Professor of History, Evergreen State CollegeJudith Stacey- Herself, Professor of Sociology, New York University and Founding Member of the Council on Contemporary Families.John and Nan Wise, Julio and Amy- Themselves, New Jersey polyamorous familyRichard Cohen- Himself, Psychotherapist andDirector of International Healing FoundationAudrey and Gayda- Themselves, San Francisco lesbian coupleNanette Gartrell- Professor of Psychiatry, UC San Franciscomoreless

  • Cast & Crew
  • Penn Jillette


  • Teller


  • Star Price

  • Jon Hotchkiss

  • Michael Goudeau

  • Fan Reviews (1)
  • A very disappointing episode in an otherwise fine series.

    By jkeenley, Oct 06, 2006

  • Trivia & Quotes
  • Quotes (25)

    • Nan Wise: How your family looks is your business. We're husband, wife and children...and other people who love us and who we love. Can you explain to me WHY that's not okay?
      Penn: NO WE CAN'T! We envisioned a world where your life is YOURS. You make your own choices about what and WHO you like to do. Gay, straight, lesbian, bi...what the h*ll business is that of mine or the government's? We want you to all live happily ever after, do whatever the f*ck you want!

    • Richard Cohen: (describing an aspect of his technique) It's...the law of Physics!
      Penn: (in voiceover) PHYSICS?? Oh yeah, right, it's "Newton's First Law of D*ck Motion". A d*ck in motion stays in motion, a d*ck at rest...well you know.

    • Richard Cohen: Some people said "You're born this way, accept it, this is who you are.". And I knew that was a bunch of malarkey. I KNEW it wasn't how I was born. I knew I was destined to have a wife and children.
      Penn: (in voiceover) And Teller and I were destined to be cowboys...we're such f*ckups...

    • Penn: The answer to every question I ask is going to be "D*ck*. (Teller holds up a sign with "D*ck" on it) Are you following me?
      Crew: (in unison, offscreen) D*CK!
      Penn: Uh, what's the name of the PSYCHOtherapist, say it loud...
      Crew: (in unison, offscreen) D*CK!
      Penn: ...who was expelled from the American Counseling Association for violations of its Code of Ethics?
      Crew: (in unison, offscreen) D*CK!
      Penn: What scientific evidence is there that sexual preference can be changed through counseling?
      Crew: (in unison, offscreen) D*CK!
      Penn: Okay then. (Teller turns sign to reveal a drawing of a d*ck)

    • Penn: (in voiceover) Dr. Gartrell's study only uncovered ONE disturbing side effect for kids with gay parents...other than loving all the shows on Bravo.
      Nanette Gartrell: By the age of 10, about half of them have experienced what they describe as homophobia.
      Penn: (in voiceover) SO, the only negative to having same-sex the bigotry of OTHER PEOPLE.

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    Trivia (2)

    • The full list of people and/or things that end up in bed with Penn at various times over the course of the episode: three women, two ducks, a woman in Victorian dress, a waiter, a woman dressed as Jeannie from "I Dream of Jeannie", Teller, a person in a gorilla costume, a George W. Bush lookalike, and a female scientist.

    • Of the things mentioned in the opening tease, Penn and Teller do discuss the Loch Ness Monster (and, by proxy though not explicitly, unicorns) in their Cryptozoology episode and technically discuss Satan in their Exorcisms episode.

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