Revenge "Blood" Review: Family Matters
The main detriment to Revenge's success has always been its 22-episode season. You know it. I know it. We all know it. If Revenge had shorter seasons, the show and its scandalous storytelling would be tighter. It wouldn't have to find so many vaguely interesting subplots to fill time. "Blood" was an episode that accomplished little because it's setting up, what I have to assume, is the season end-game. But right now, it's difficult to tell what that even is, because there were so many different things happening this week and none of them seemed all that exciting or important to an overarching story.
When the series introduced Stevie Grayson, I was excited. She seemed like a fierce woman who could become a great ally for Emily. She tried, I'll admit, but Victoria managed to break her. After just a handful of weeks in the Hamptons she was drinking again, because the Graysons are jerks, and Jack was taking her home to Los Angeles. The Hamptons ruins people, and Revenge's 22-episode season ruins many potentially interesting storylines and characters. Stevie had potential, and she had a legitimate reason to remain in the Hamptons with her connection to Jack and Carl. Pascal, on the other hand, feels like he's being shoe-horned in to plots to appear more interesting than he actually is.
I stated last week that I don't give a damn about the drama at Voulez, and now I'd like to extend that sentiment to the storylines about Pascal's entire media empire. No wait, make that everything relating to Pascal. Voulez and the drama surrounding its chic offices is the new Initiative storyline, guys. No one cares about it. Pascal is barely a character, and yet he's somehow involved in 90 percent of the show's current storylines. He's connected to Margaux, obviously, and she'll be taking over the company, which is a good thing, because it means we've seen the end of Margaux's complaints about her daddy issues, but she also deserves this. She's worked her ass off and is the right person to take over the company. Further more, I like that she's not forsaking work for her relationship with Jack, even if I'm still a little confused about how they're still together and still (mostly) happy. Plus, she threw Victoria under the bus with her crack about a woman being able to work and have a life. Margaux 1. Victoria 0 (how's your art gallery coming along, Vee?).
Pascal's also connected to Conrad if only because the latter wants to take over his media empire. Someone needs to get Conrad a hobby, stat, because I think he's doing all of this out of boredom, and it's making him boring. Conrad is not boring. Conrad is evil and slimy, but flying to South America to steal business from Pascal is not the evil and slimy this show needs or its viewers want. I think if we could ask Conrad, even he would admit his storyline is boring and stupid. Give Conrad something better to do, writers. Please. And while you're at it, please do something about Victoria's newfound happiness with Pascal. It's very uncomfortable to see her this happy, to be honest.
Pascal's relationship to Emily and Aiden should be the strongest storyline, given it's tied to the David Clarke scandal, but it's still barely more than a dangling plot thread that allowed for Aiden's return last week. It also resulted in the duo taking an impromptu trip to visit Aiden's mom in England this week, because one spur of the moment trip per episode is just not enough. As much as I don't care for Aiden and his storyline, the scene with his mother was very touching and emotional, and hopefully gave his character the closure he was seeking. But the trip was mostly just a really long roundabout way of introducing yet another character who will probably die or become useless in the span of an episode or two. Oscar Chapman supposedly has information about Pascal's connection to David Clarke, but he also faked his own death, according to Mason Treadwell. And speaking of everyone's favorite sassy scapegoat, his return this week was not everything I'd hoped it would be. He was allowed a few good one-liners, but then he nearly died by face cream (did I fall asleep and wake up to an episode of Reign or something?) so Emily and Nolan could smuggle him out of prison and to the Maldives until Emily was ready to tell him her story. Okay, at least he's not dead, I guess?
"Blood" was a not a good episode. Piling one boring storyline on another hoping that they'll eventually cancel each other out or suddenly become interesting doesn't work. It only makes for an episode full of terribly uninteresting and disconnected plots. In the aftermath of Emily's shooting, things appeared to be looking up for Revenge. The series was back on track as Emily had a renewed interest and focus on her mission to take down the Graysons once and for all, but it appears the 22-episode season has caught up with her once again. There are only four episodes left this season, and at this point, you could tell me Daniel will become a Solid Gold Dancer and Charlotte will become a mob boss by the finale, and I'd believe you, because this season is so disjointed that it has no direction left. If it comes back for Season 4, ABC should seriously consider adopting the 13-episode model, because Revenge simply cannot continue to exist like this.
– Javier and Charlotte: My audio cut out for most of their scene and I'm pretty sure it made it 50 percent more interesting.
– Please, please, please tell me we're not headed for a Jack/Margaux/Daniel love triangle.
– Hobbies that would make Conrad more interesting: tornado chasing, drag racing, base jumping, scuba diving, home brewing, candle making, rock collecting
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