The English Patient

Season 8, Ep 17, Aired 3/13/97
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  • Episode Description
  • A woman mistakes George for her boyfriend Neil, a guy who looks just like him. This intrigues George; he wants to meet Neil. Jerry is going to Florida to help his parents move. Kramer asks him to pick up some Cubans from his cigar guy and also gives him a T-shirt. Elaine and her boyfriend see "The English Patient"; she absolutely hates it and that makes her unpopular and dumped. Jerry's dad gets the T-shirt, #1 Dad, that he is very proud to wear, despite its small size. At his parents' exercise room, Jerry meets Izzy, an 80-year-old man who can't stand to lose; he challenges Jerry to a weightlifting competition; "It's go time!" He throws his back out again and again. Kramer's Cubans arrive; they're real people and not the cigars that Jerry thought he would be getting. George is overly obsessed with Neil, to the point where he is missing out on Danielle. Jerry is back in New York, where Izzy has returned to see a back specialist. Though Kramer's Cubans are really Dominicans he tries to pass them off as "Cubans" anyway; it doesn't work. Elaine's dislike for the film alienates her from everyone. When she tells Peterman that she hasn't seen the film, he immediately takes steps to correct the situation. Jerry meets the rest of Izzy's family all of who are fiercely competitive. He finds work for Kramer's "Cubans." Elaine still hates the movie, but must go to the Tunisian desert to live in a cave to save her job. Kramer thinks his unemployed Dominicans, whom he educated about communism, are planning to revolt; later they do. George gets a last word on Neil when Danielle makes a decision between the two of them.moreless

  • Cast & Crew
  • Michael Richards (I)

    Cosmo Kramer

  • Jerry Seinfeld


  • Julia Louis-Dreyfus

    Elaine Marie Benes (not in pilot)

  • Jason Alexander

    George Louis Costanza

  • Steve Koren

  • Fan Reviews (5)
  • Seinfeld rules!

    By OeTvGreat, Jul 21, 2006

  • How a movie can ruin your day!

    By sluggmunki_tx, Aug 28, 2007

  • How anyone can like the movie "the English patient" is beyond me. I tried to watch it, but it is un-watch able. So I bonded with Elaine immediately. Favourite line from Elaine: At least give me something I can use! Sex in a tub - that doesn't work!

    By EvanBama, Mar 17, 2010

  • A bit decent.

    By cactusjack39, Feb 13, 2009

  • One of the funniest episodes ever!

    By titiembe, Aug 27, 2007

  • Trivia & Quotes
  • Quotes (42)

    • Jerry: (to George) So she wanted you to come up but you left because you thought some guy might be calling you!?!

    • Elaine: Oh, come on, Blaine. I mean, look at the poster for Sack Lunch. Blaine: It's a family in a brown paper bag.

    • Guillermo: Ladies and gentleman, because we have been exploited by your Magic Pan Crepe restaurants, we are hijacking this plane to Cuba. Kindly stay in your seats, and shut that movie off. Elaine: Aw, nuts!

    • George: So, we meet at last. I admire your skills, Mr. Peanut.

    • Izzy Sr.: Hey, I can't see the TV. Jerry: (approaches the TV and moves) Here! (leaves w/ the Mandelbaums shocked) Izzy: You think you're better than us, don't you?!

    Show More Quotes

    Notes (2)

    • Lloyd Bridges is credited as a "Special Appearance".

    • Instead of the Castle Rock logo closing music, we hear the three Mandelbaums saying "Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!"

    Trivia (4)

    • This is the first Florida - based episode where Jack Klompus doesn't appear.

    • George says to Danielle that she really only had to give him Neil's number, and didn't have to take him out. She then invites him to stay the night and he says he can't; he wants to be home in case Neil calls. Neil doesn't know who George is, nor does he have his number. As George just said, Danielle just gave Neil's number to him, and not the other way around.

    • After Jerry puts down the weights and Izzy says, "Step aside string bean", Jerry rolls the weight back so that Izzy can get to the larger one. Izzy didn't say that he was going to lift the larger one, so why would Jerry move it back?

    • When Elaine and Mr. Peterman enter the theatre, different people are in the seats to those who are around them a few scenes later.

    Allusions (1)

    • Jerry: What if it's Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong is the astronaut who was the first man to set foot on the moon back in 1969.

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