The Beverly Hillbillies

Jed Buys the Capitol

Season 9, Ep 3, Aired 9/29/70
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  • Episode Description
  • The Clampetts are confused after being taken to a place called a Psych ward and being called "Paranoiacs and Schizophrenics." They ask Honest John what it is about. He tells them it is a mistake and promises they can see the President, just as soon as some trouble is settled. He returns to Flo and tells her he is going to take the Clampetts for another two million. She wants to go to Guatemala, but he gets her to pose. They sell Jed the Capitol, and much more of the property. Meanwhile, Jethro is trying to figure out where the countries of Paranoia or Schizophrenia are. Jed and Granny return to say they've bought more land. Honest John sells them more and more property, and at the end, he has ten million in property sold. But Elly is looking for a kitten and walks in on Honest John and Flo. The Clampetts all see this and think he is still the salt of the earth for taking in a 150 year old Native American woman. He admits she is his wife, and they are crooks. They misunderstand and still praise him, and he tears up the checks worth ten million. The Clampetts think they have over-praised him yet again.moreless

  • Cast & Crew
  • Donna Douglas

    Elly May Clampett

  • Buddy Ebsen

    Jed Clampett

  • Nancy Kulp

    Jane Hathaway

  • Irene Ryan

    Daisy Moses "Granny"

  • Raymond Bailey

    Milburn Drysdale

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  • Trivia & Quotes
  • Quotes (4)

    • (Honest John is trying to say that he and his wife are crooks) John: We work together. We’re confederates. Granny: Glory be! If all the people were like you, the South will rise again!

    • (Granny tells Elly to take back the kittens she got) Elly: But Granny, I already named em. Granny: Don’t matter. Take em back. Elly: They’s all named after presidents. This in here is George Washington. This in here is Abraham Lincoln. And this in is Theodore Roosevelt. Granny: Take em back Elly. Elly: This one is Jefferson Davis. Granny: He can stay.

    • John: I’m sure the First Lady will be very relieved. Jed: First Lady? John: That’s how we refer to the President’s wife. (leaves) Jed: Did ya here that, Granny? They call her “The First Lady.” Granny: Yeah. I bet the other President’s wives wouldn’t appreciate a crack like that.

    • Granny: Now that I recollect, they did think that we come from a foreign country. Jed: Yeah. Place called, uh, Paranoia. Granny: There was another country mentioned too. Jed: That’s right. They said that from the way we look and acted, we was either, uh, Paranoiacs or Schizophrenics. Granny: Yeah! John: A natural mistake. There are many of them here in Washington.

    Notes (1)

    • This is the last appearance of Phil Silvers as "Honest" John Shafer in the series.

    Trivia (2)

    • District Of Columbia To English Translator, as according to Honest John and Sitting Hawk: Part Two Mini Ha-ha – Lovely Lady Schlemiel – Genius Nalaganset – Make an offer. Tacoma Allegany – Two Million Tuscaloosa – It’s A Deal Ix Ne – Washington Monument Amschre – Lincoln Memorial Guatemala – Airport

    • When Honest John is trying to prove that he and Flo are crooks, he says that they are confederates, to which Granny replies that if there were more like them, the South could rise again. But in most of the other episodes, she always says that the South won the Civil War, or as she calls it, The War Between The States or The Great War. She also says that the North have been saying they will rise again. Apparently, she has learned the truth after the nine years in Beverly Hills.

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