The Catherine Tate Show

BBC Two
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  • Episode Guide
  • S 3 : Ep 8

    Catherine Tate Christmas Special

    Aired 12/25/07

  • S 3 : Ep 7

    Comic Relief 2007

    Aired 3/16/07

  • S 3 : Ep 6

    Series 3, Episode 6

    Aired 11/30/06

  • S 3 : Ep 6

    Episode 6

    Aired

  • S 3 : Ep 5

    Series 3, Episode 5

    Aired 11/23/06

  • Cast & Crew
  • Catherine Tate

    Various

  • Mathew Horne

    Various

  • Niky Wardley

    Various

  • Angela McHale

    Various

  • Michael Brandon

    Various

  • Photos (1)
  • show Description
  • Meet Catherine Tate, the woman who gives a new name to comedy with her brand new show ironically named, The Catherine Tate Show. Featuring various hilarious characters including a lippy teenager named 'Lauren' and a rather rude Old Lady. The show managed to win several awards: 2004: Banff Rockie Award - Best Comedy 2004: British Comedy Award - Best TV Comedy Newcomer 2006: British Comedy Award - Best TV Comedy Actress 2006: RTS Television Award - Best Comedy Performance 2006: RTS Television Award - Best Entertainment 2007: National Television Award - Most Popular Comedy Programme the show was nominated for even more awards: 2004: British Comedy Award - Best TV Comedy Actress 2004: RTS Television Award - Best Make Up Design in Entertainment and Non-Drama Productions 2005: BAFTA TV Award - Best New Writer 2005: BAFTA TV Award - Comedy Programme or Series Award 2005: British Comedy Award - Best TV Comedy Actress 2005: British Comedy Award - People's Choice Award (Polled most votes but award not received) 2005: Emmy - Best Performance by an Actress 2006: BAFTA TV Award - Best Comedy Performance 2006: BAFTA TV Award - Best Comedy Programme or Series "production team" 2006: National Television Award - Most Popular Comedy Programme 2007: BAFTA TV Award - Best Comedy Programme 2007: BAFTA TV Award - Best Make Up & Hair Designmoreless

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  • danbambridge

    User Score: 117

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  • Trivia & Quotes
  • Quotes (61)

    • Not Drunk Enough Woman: Well, here we are then Man: Thanks for a lovely evening. Not Drunk Enough Woman: No no, thank you. Well, goodnight. Man: Goodnight. (walks off) Man: (returns) ...Claire? Not Drunk Enough Woman: Yes? Man: You know, I don't..I don't really feel like going home now. Is..is there any chance for another drink, or... a cup of coffee? Not Drunk Enough Woman: James... I know you want to come in, and I know you probably want more than just a drink, or a cup of coffee. It's just that....I'm not drunk enough. Man: Whats wrong, Claire, don't..don't you like me? Not Drunk Enough Woman: Of course I like you, I'm just... not drunk enough to find you attractive. I more than want to be drunk enough. Man: W...well why aren't you drunk now? Not Drunk Enough Woman: I am drunk now, I can hardly stand up. ..I'm just not drunk enough. Man: Is there anything I can do? Not Drunk Enough Woman: No,...because you're just not attractive. Man: (upset) ...But I took you to the Munich beer festival. Not Drunk Enough Woman: I know, I thought that would be it, and I tried, I drank my own weight in German beer. I was completely out of my tree the whole time we were there. I got arrested!....TWICE. But it still wasn't enough. Man: Maybe... maybe you'll never be drunk enough. Not Drunk Enough Woman: Oh, James, I do like you, if only I could get so spectacularly p*ssed I just wasn't worth what you look like. Man: Hang, on, there's an operation you can have, whic... which allows more alcohol into your bloodstream. Not Drunk Enough Woman: James, no, my liver's wrecked as it is, I've drank so much to try and find you attractive, the doctors say I may be dead within a year. Goodnight, James. Man: Claire! (hands her a beer can) ...give me a call.

    • (Young Parents sketch) Husband: I think I will just pop in and use their loo, shall I see you in there? Wife: Erm no... Because do you remember that baby I had six months ago? Well for the first time in 36 hours she appears to be asleep and if I move her she will probably wake up and when she wakes up I'm likely to kill you and then kill myself, so no I don't think I will see you inside.

    • Mrs. Taylor, The Rancid Pensioner: Ah, ah, ah, ah It's me programme...Oh it's on now...Oh I love this I do, you seen this...That fat girl off Emmerdale; Huge Big Frame. Grandson: You've Been Framed? Mrs. Taylor, The Rancid Pensioner: Yeah...You seen this, oh she goes round with a Cine-camera and she takes pictures and then she shows it to you on the telly, oh it's comical innit...mind you she don't half know some fucking stupid people.

    • (silence) Kate: You want kids, don't you? Ellen: Yeah, one day. We have spoken about it, and it'd be nice. Kate: Jenny Topley's just had another one. Ellen: Has she? Kate: Yeah. Surprised she's got time for anything else. Ellen: (laughs) It's not her first then. Kate: Jenny Topley? her first? You know Jenny Topley. Ellen: ...Do I? Kate: Jenny Topley from the canteen, you've heard me speak about her loads of times. Ellen: Oh yeah. (silence) Kate: Guess how many kids she's got now. Ellen: ...Oh. Kate: How many kids has she got now. Ellen: I wouldn't have a clue... Kate: Then have a guess. You've heard me talk about her, she's always pregnant. Ellen: I really have no idea. Kate: Yes you do, come on. Jenny "kids are us" Topley. How many. Just guess. Ellen: I don't know. Kate: Come on, how many kids does she have now? Ellen: I have no idea. Kate: Just have a guess! Ellen: Twelve? Kate: ...Twelve?! ...who has twelve kids? She's a woman, not a cat. Ellen: Alright, three? Kate: Jenny Topley? Three? She's been pregnant all her adult life. Ellen: Five? Kate: Five, am I speaking another language? No she hasn't got 5... Ellen: Alright eight! Kate: Seven. She's got seven kids. Ellen: Seven...wow, that's a lot of kids. Kate: Yes it is! - (quietly) seven more than you'll ever have, you barren old crunk.

    • Kate: I got my lunch from that new sandwich shop. Avocado, Tomato on Wholemeal, soy and mayonnaise. Ellen: Three pound Twenty. (Kate gets annoyed because Ellen is right, and finishes eating sandwich) Kate: ...Lesbian.

    • Woman: Just on the High street's find. How much will that be? Taxi Driver: Uh, about twelve quid. Woman: Oh great. (Homeless guy starts to wash the windscreen) Taxi Driver: No no, it's fine! It's washed, I've ju..oh Homeless guy: Just a quick wash. Taxi Driver: No, it's clean, please... (Homeless man walks off) Woman: Oh they don't take no for an answer, do they? Taxi Driver: No...it's unbelievable, every day they do that, and every day, I have to say no. Woman: You know what you could do... Taxi Driver: What's that? Woman: Well you could just get out of your car and just say "NO!! NO!! NO!! NO!! I said NO!!" and then just get his pay of water and sling it right over his greasy, flea-ridden head, and he'll be like "Ow that's hot! Ow that's hot! Ow that's hot!", and then just give him one backhander, one swift backhander right across his steamy red face! Taxi Driver: W..well.. Woman: Hitler-worshipping pikey scum! ...actually just round the corner's fine.

    • Woman: Hi, I've brought this top back, but the shop I bought it from has closed down... Information Woman: Oh, bad luck. Woman: What? Infomation Woman: I hate that, it's exactly the sort of thing that happens to me. Woman: Well... what am I supposed to do with this? it's the wrong size... Infomation Woman: You could try wearing it over your shoulders with the sleeves knotted? Woman: (laughs) No, you don't understand; it's no good to me, I don't want it. Infomation Woman: (thinks she's offering it to her) Oh that's very kind..um...oh, I don't really think that would suit me. Woman: No, I want to take it back to the shop. Do you know where they've gone? Infomation Woman: Who's that? Woman: The people that run the shop. Information Woman: Well if the shop's closed down, they've probably just...gone home.

    • Grandson: Here Nan, have you seen Jean lately? Nan: 'oo? Grandson: Jean. Nan: ..Jean? Grandson: Yeah. Have you seen her? Nan: Jean 'oo? Grandson: Jean. Jean! Nan: Who's Jean!? Grandson: How many Jeans do you know? Nan: I don't know no Jeans. Grandson: What do you mean you don't know any Jeans, Jean from over the road, Jean Baker, you went to school with her mother. Nan: Oh yes. Is she called Jean? Grandson: You know she is Nan: What about 'er? Grandson: Have you seen her? Nan: No, whass 'appened to 'er? Grandson: Nothings happened to her, I'm asking you if you've seen her lately? Nan: I ain't seen 'er. Grandson: You've not seen Jean? Nan: Noooowh. Grandson: You've not seen Jean from over the road? Nan: Noowh. Grandson: Are you sure? Nan: O'course I'm sure, whass the matter wi' ya? I ain't seen no-one 'av I? I aint seen a living soul, I haven't been oudside mi' door. Grandson: So you've definitely not seen Jean..? Nan: ..Ohh, I AINT SEEN NO JEAN!! You're obsessed with the woman 'ain't ya! Grandson: Well..no, it's just that I saw her on my way over here, and usually she's very friendly, but today she just ignored me! Are you sure you haven't seen her? Nan: WHO?? Grandson: JEAN!! Nan: Oh yes I seen her. Grandson: I knew you had, what did you say to her? Nan: ...Aint she got fat! Ohh ain't she fat that woman. 'Av you seen 'er lately? Oohh she is a size! Grandson: NAN! Nan: argh..GREAT BIG FAT A**. What a liberty! I shouldn't have to look at that! Nan: She's got a fat back and all ain't she! Grandson: Nan! Nan: She's got a fat back, the woman. Great, big, fat, dirty, hairy, sweating back! Nan: Ohh no, terrible ain't it; ohhw, that is very unfeminine on a woman. Nan: (to Grandson) UH-UH-UH-UH, don't you say things like that about people. Orrhh no. Not at my 'ouse dear, oh no.

    Show More Quotes

    Notes (37)

    • Original International Air Dates: Czech Republic: January 5, 2010 on HBO Comedy

    • Michael Brandon was billed as special guest star.

    • The theme tune for the first series is "In These Shoes?" by Kirsty MacColl.

    • Original International Air Dates: Czech Republic: January 6, 2010 on HBO Comedy

    • Original International Air Dates: Czech Republic: January 11, 2010 on HBO Comedy

    • Original International Air Dates: Czech Republic: January 12, 2010 on HBO Comedy

    • Original International Air Dates: Czech Republic: January 13, 2010 on HBO Comedy

    • Catherine Tate actually filmed this episode after the final. The scheduling was difficult, so they filmed the final before this episode.

    Show More Notes

    Trivia (12)

    • The two office women work at "Callas & Sait".

    • To date, the "Martin Webb" sketch is the only sketch in which Catherine Tate does not appear.

    • This is the only The Catherine Tate Show episode in which a character has died.

    • This episode marks the last appearance of Jill, better known as "Lady Clown".

    • This is the only episode of the first season where "Fly Girl" aka "Lauren" (am i bovvered?) does not appear.

    • This episode marks the first appearance of Derek Faye.

    • This special episode won the 'Best Comedy' award from BANAFF FOCKIE AWARDS 2004.

    • Despite appearing in the intro in this season, Sheila Carter (snobbish Scottish woman) did not appear in this season.

    Show More Trivia

    Allusions (4)

    • Nan: Her husband looks like Charles Manson! Charles Manson was the head of the Manson gang which killed several people back in 1969.

    • The 'Life at Ma's' sketch is a parody of the BBC's Life on Mars.

    • The scenes with the woman in charge of sending a really important email, who also obviously knows nothing about keyboards/computers, is a clear parody of the hit show 24, as the start of the sketch features a clock counting down, and similar music to what is often seen on the actual show.

    • Vernon: Can I pay you tomorrow? Irene: You are so like Lord Lucan. Richard Bingham, 7th Earl of Lucan, disappeared in 1974 after his children's nanny was found murdered. Officially declared dead in 1999, he was often (mistakenly) sighted all over the world.

  • Fan Reviews (18)
  • Great show

    By matthewrundle15, Apr 10, 2013

  • Am I bovvered??

    By CSI_Fiona, Jan 23, 2007

  • A perfect example of the genre it belongs to

    By CellBlocknutter, Apr 12, 2008

  • This really is such a wonderful show.

    By HanHong, Feb 01, 2008

  • tHE CATHERINE TATE SHOW

    By CT-9900, Jan 22, 2008

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