True Blood "Almost Home" Review: Farewell, Marquis de Sade

By Lily Sparks

Aug 11, 2014

True Blood S07E08: "Almost Home"


True Blood is making me nervous. Here we are, with so many story threads seemingly wound up: Eric is well. Angel Tara has delivered her message unto Earth. Jessica and Jason are safe from Violet and so totes in love. Where we landed in “Almost Home” was where I thought we’d land in the series finale. So what final shocking twists are hiding just beyond the next Spanish-moss-laden turn of the Bon Temps Parish path? Where can the show go from here?

First off, Sarah Newlin got sucked like a Capri Sun, healing Eric.


Bill and Sookie made a lot of peace with almost five seasons' worth of absolute bullshit.


Violet called Jason to a Murder House by sending images to his flip phone. I know the flip phone was a blast from the past, but considering the timeline of this show it's still roughly Alternate Universe 2008, so it's a little more okay. 

Anyway, Violet had composed a tableau of Marquis de Sade-level sexual violence. Actress Karolina Wydra enjoyed an enviable monologue, complete with an un-toppable prop (a red-hot dildo)...


...and then Hoyt swooped in, killed her with a wooden bullet, and simultaneously secured the futures of Adilyn, Wade, Jessica, and Jason. Well done, Hoyt!


Hoyt and Jessica reconnected. It’s a little spoken-of phenomenon, but there’s nothing more undeniable than an adoring ex-boyfriend. In this case, the ex-boyfriend can't even remember Jessica's old bullshit and nasty arguments! No wonder she's folding in front of him like he’s emotional kryptonite. An adoring ex-boyfriend is comfy like a Snuggie and sexy like Fabio, understanding like a school chum while knowing your kinks like a diary. Problematically, Hoyt and Jessica's renewed chemistry came on the heels of Jason admitting he was in love with her, albeit in abstract terms that framed intimacy as a ride in Glinda the Good Witch’s bubble. Sure, I’ll take it.


Meanwhile, with Sarah Newlin pinioned in the Fangtasia basement, the Yakuza Cowboy laid down a verse from Chris Rock's standup ca. 2000: The money isn’t in the cure, the money's in the medicine. Rather than synthesizing and selling a straight-up antidote to Hep-V, he’s going to sell a stop-gap partial cure that will compel Hep-V positive vampires to buy Antidote-Recipe Nu Blood for their entire immortal lives just to keep their disease at bay. Although really, wasn't obsolescence built into Tru Blood Original Recipe? Like, the choice for vampires was either drink Tru Blood or live a life of crime, right? But the show is making a political point about corporate America, and I respect its effort to send a message. 


Meanwhile, a frightened family watched a pastor, his wife, and his wife’s nephew do V and saunter through their house. Very patient of them. Lettie Mae and Lafayette and Mr. Lettie Mae got to finally see what Tara had been leading them all toward this season: an Emmy nomination.


J/K but really, what a meaty scene for Adina Porter! She killed it. Tara’s dad was the worst, and Tara almost killed him as a child but didn’t, and what she wanted to communicate to her mother was forgiveness. Also Rutina Wesley looked like a Vanity Fair cover. Gorgeousness! 


Hoyt turned up on Jessica’s door with a bag of blood and eyes full of thirst. Erasing the past apparently didn't affect the chemistry between Jessica and Hoyt. Will Jason intervene? Will Jessica try to hook up with Hoyt again, now that there isn't a "batteries included"-type package deal with his overbearing mom?


For those of us who were still white-knuckling through the original Eric-Sookie-Bill love triangle, there was a flutter of remembrance of what Eric and Sookie used to be this episode: Eric chased down Sookie to tell her he was cured, but she was like “Bill Bill Bill blah blah blah” so Eric shot out of there. Oh, Sookie. 

Later she chased him down to Fangtasia during daylight hours, and the Yakuza were not happy about it. I’m not sure why the Yakuza were so threatened by a 90-pound lady in Walmart petite wear, but they were really on edge with Sookie, ready to pump her body full of lead if she made one false move. Like, why? They’d already drawn and synthesized Sarah Newlin’s blood, it's not like she was precious cargo. Yet Sookie walking into Fangtasia drew a similar response to seeing, say, a man made of matches walking into a lake full of gasoline.


Eric came to the rescue, pretending to glamour the unglamour-able Sookie. She used the time to read the mind of the Yakuza Cowboy, arguably the smartest instinct she’s had in three seasons, and later burst into the basement of Fangtasia, where she discovered Sarah Newlin awaiting deliverance.


In perhaps the best move Sookie has ever made, she left that bitch tied up to the death carousel. Well done, Sookie, well done.

Later, though, when Sookie brought Jason and Bill to Sarah Newlin to drink of her antidote-laden blood, Bill flat-out refused. What’s up with that? We have two more episodes in the entire series. Bill, stop playing. 


If Violet dying, Bill getting his hands on the antidote, and Tara communicating to her mom aren’t part of the series finale, what the hell is? The next two episodes feel weirdly unpredictable, and I can’t wait for them.


QUESTIONS:

... WHAT IS BILL THINKING?!?!?!!


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  • Dirk13 Aug 19, 2014

    I had this weird feeling that if Bill drank from Sarah, his super virus would mingle with her antidote and cause something bad to happen...and I think him putting up a fuss, for whatever stupid reason he has, is helping build up this possibility (because of bill lept at the chance and happily said "why sure! I'd love to be cured!" it will make us have less sympathy for him when he creates vampire super-v via his selfishness).

    Seriously, why IS it ok for Eric to bite Sarah to get cured? I know she has the antitote in her, but I'd hardly want to contaminate the source..

  • YeomanRand Aug 15, 2014

    When Sarah says, "What's that?!!", and Jason replies, "That's death comin' for ya.", it reminded me a lot of the final scenes in Fight Club where the Edward Norton character is taunted by Tyler Durden.

  • gothceltgirl Aug 15, 2014

    Bill can't possibly be thinking clearly. Maybe the Hep-V is making him crazy and all broody and stuff. And he feels all guilty and irredeemable or something. I'm sure that will turn out to be what it is. You're right Lily, he needs to stop playing. Don't mess with me Bill, geez!

    I am thoroughly enjoying Yakuza Cowboy though. Wow, he's one of the most entertaining new characters we've had in a while.

    Nu Blood OMG, I hope they make an actual beverage and have it on the air as well as the HBO Shop. What the hell are they waiting for? They need to capitalize on all of our geeky enthusiasm for overpriced mediocre beverages that come in fancy bottles.

    And I'm so totally nervous, anxious, and apprehensive about the series finale. I don't even know what to do with myself.

  • jacquimarie Aug 15, 2014

    I thought the scene with Jessica and Jason in the car was them mutually agreeing their relationship was important and meaningful but a romance was no longer a part of their future. Jessica called it a beautiful friendship after all. With everything they've been through I think they're calling it a day

  • loldude1 Aug 14, 2014

    I can easily see that Vampire Bill is just plain tired. Sookie's endless running toward danger has worn down even his supernatural vitality. Eat a wooden bullet, Bill. Why prolong the ennui.

    I was rather glad when Hoyt shot Violet. Not because it does anything for Hoyt, but because Violet was a poor woman's Russell Edgington. She hadn't expressed any of this taste for torture and hot-rod play before, so it felt forced. Here declaration that she was hot stuff compared to Helen of Troy and Cleopatra when she was too young to have ever known them unless they were vampires sealed her fate.

  • gothceltgirl Aug 15, 2014

    I thought she was just comparing herself to those historical figures because she was obviously so full of herself. I never even considered that they could've been vampire contemporaries or anything. But I think she was just wayyy too full of herself. I was like take it down a notch, you're not all that!

  • amberf222 Aug 13, 2014

    I think the whole point of all the Bill flashbacks is to show that he doesn't want to live any more. I think it's the theme of euthanasia--at a certain point, perhaps, even vampires think it's time to call it a day. I have a feeling that's where they're going with the whole "Bill doesn't want to be cured" thing. He's made peace with Sookie, but their relationship is different now. On a more shallow note, I'm hoping for a spinoff featuring only Eric and Pam. "Fangtasia" would be a great title for a new show. More Eric naked, please...

  • Lyta_499 Aug 13, 2014

    This final season is generally a lot better than the previous 2-3 ones, but the problems the show has are still visible. Plotlines dragging on and on for no particular reason (see Tara's arc, we thought there was something important going on there and it was just more family drama - she could have forgiven her mom in *one* episode), too much soap-opera based on Sookie, plotholes as big as craters (like others have pointed out, why not get a syringe and just get the blood to Bill? Five people needed to do that?)

    At this point I couldn't care less what Sookie says or does, barring Jason she must be the dumbest character in the show. Hooking up with Alcide, getting herself infected due to being careless and impatient, getting Alcide killed for pretty much the same reason, then giving her blood to Bill. Infecting Bill, then hooking up with him 2 days after Alcide's death?!? It's not at all convincing that someone like Bill would be desperately in love with her, let alone Eric.

    Violet's death could've been more exciting. She was played up and then needlessly played down and killed within a matter of seconds, by Hoyt no less. And Bill with his vampire existential drama, please. Just drink the damn thing and get it over with! I'm enjoying these episodes but all the while it's understandable, that it's the right time for the show to end.

  • amberf222 Aug 13, 2014

    Agreed. I never liked Tara. All she does is cry and/or look hurt/weepy. Her character was always annoying (her mother even more so) to me. I fast-forwarded most of this "Ghost Tara" B.S. Waste of airtime, IMHO.

    One of my favorite characters is Sam, but his actions of late make NO SENSE. Yeah, Bon Temps is his home, but really? "I'm going to abandon my wife and baby because I really dig this super-dangerous, post-apocalyptic town," said No One.

  • gothceltgirl Aug 15, 2014

    But I liked how insightful Arlene was with him at the bar, when she talked about the decision that he needed to make. I agree, he needs to get over Bon Temps and if he does indeed love her (Nicole), as he said, which I only caught upon watching the episode a 2nd time, then he needs to go and be with her. Where's the problem?! Maybe they're all a little addicted to danger, huh? It looks Sookie might not be the only danger whore.

  • Lyta_499 Aug 14, 2014

    Tara is like, the crybaby and drama-queen of the show. Good actress and I like Rutina Wesley, but they could have given her something more substantial to do. Tara becoming a vampire was pretty much the most interesting thing that happened to her character through the whole series, and instead of exploring that they got her killed. And then she spent like, 8 episodes pointlessly running around like a ghost.

    I'm indifferent to Sam, but I also agree that letting Nicole leave while pregnant with his baby is beyond stupid. I haven't read the final book but I think it may be related to what I hear about the ending of the book series (I'm not writing more due to spoilers).

  • ionee24 Aug 13, 2014

    Maybe it's just me but I loved Sookie's reasoning for leaving Sarah in the basement: even when she's the solution, Sarah is really just part of the problem.

  • beowulf579 Aug 13, 2014

    "Very patient of them."
    What were they going to do? Call the sheriff that wasn't anywhere near the parish? Call the deputy that was tied in the dungeon? Call the dead cop who decided it was smart to run with a mob? All that was left was that shaky officer and who knows where he is.
    All they could be was patient.

    The only thing that kind of irked me was that after Sookie discovered what the cure was...go to the local pharmacy...get a syringe and get some of her blood and take it to Bill.

    I agree with some of the other commentors about the Yakuza. They killed Newlin's Dad in plain sight of dozens of eye witnesses at a Presidential Library. They are not going to care about a small town deputy.

  • aktarian Aug 12, 2014

    Wow! That was, what's the word...., stupid!

    Tara plot? Jeeeeeeeeeeeesus H. Christ. We had to tolerate entire season of that crap for this? What kind of ending to that story arch is that?

    Yakuza/Eric partnership makes less and less sense. "Oh, you say her brother is a cop? Oooooooh, I'm so scared. I have these tough guys, bunch of guns and all this tech at my disposal but I better not anger small town cop. But you are right, it's not as if there are large groups of crazy vampires killing people and wiping out entire towns so of course one woman going missing will be noticed. Also because I don't really trust you I'll leave Sarah here, with you. I know I told you we can't give pure cure to anybody but pelase, don't give it to anybody."

    Bill rejecting cure? Must be because he feels guilty for all the innocent people he killed. I mean, alst couple of eps it was jsut scene after scene of him regretting killing that lawyer woman.

    Violet learned why villains shouldn't monologue. Ever!

    But no Sam so at least that's that.

  • TonedeadJones Aug 13, 2014

    Sometimes the problem isn't with the show. This is a great example .

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