Writer:	Ian Busch
Director:	Ken Kwapis
Star:	Jane Kaczmarek (Lois Wilkerson),  Frankie Muniz (Malcolm Wikerson),  Erik Per Sullivan (Dewey Wilkerson),  Justin Berfield (Reese Wilkerson),  Christopher Masterson (Francis Wilkerson),  Bryan Cranston (Hal Wilkerson)
Recurring Role:	Craig Lamar Traylor (Stevie),  Evan Matthew Cohen (Lloyd),  Kyle Sullivan (Dabney),  Drew Powell (Cadet Drew),  Eric Nenninger (Cadet Eric),  Kasan Butcher (Joe)
Guest Star:	Catherine Lloyd Burns (Caroline),  Johnny Lewis (Cadet Martin),  Nancy Lenehan (Christie)

Featured Music:
"Drunk is Better than Dead" by The Push Stars
(Cleaning out the Closet)
"Washin' & Wonderin'" by Stroke 9
(Malcolm's Psychoanalysis) (edit) Cold Open: Hal buys éclairs for the family, but as there are only three, Hal and Lois decide to eat them all themselves. (edit)

Malcolm (to the camera): Okay, so I faked it. But with the family I have, it would've been only a matter of time anyway. (edit) Cadet Eric: I tried to stop him. I said, "Hey, don't put that red t-shirt in there. That's not colorfast." But he just laughed. He said, "Pink was a better color, because that's what little weak girls wear." (edit) Malcolm: What happened? Did you get caught? Where were you?
Reese: Geez, you're always so angry. Maybe you really do need therapy.
Malcolm: What I need is for you not to ruin everything for me. Do you know how much trouble we'd be in if we get caught. With Mom, with the school, WITH MOM!!
Reese: Give me a little credit, psycho. I've been doing my own research. (takes rental videos out) See, I rented Silence of the Lambs, Seven, and the Nutty Professor.
Malcolm: Oh, God! Reese, tell me exactly what you told her.
Reese: Nope. That's confidential. Now, which do you like more? Hannibal Lector or the hockey mask.
(knock on door; Lois & Mrs. Gilbert appear)
Lois: Malcolm? Reese? What do you have to say for yourselves?
Reese: Don't blame Reese? Blame Davey.
(Lois grabs his finger and breaks it)
Reese: Ow, ow, ow, ow! (edit) Malcolm (sees Reese): What are doing here?
Reese: I figured out your scam. As it turns out, crazy runs in the family.
Malcolm: Reese, you don't know what your doing. You're gonna ruin everything.
Reese: Relax. I got it covered.
Mrs. Gilbert: I'm ready to see you now, Reese.
Reese (in a gravelly voice): Reese, isn't here right now. This is Davey. (edit) Malcolm (to the camera): I need to seem cured, but to leave the door open for a relapse when I start ballet next semester. (edit)

We find out in this episode that Caroline (Catherine Lloyd Burns) is pregnant (in her third trimester). (edit) Lois attaches the bells to Malcolm's jester hat several inches from the end of each tip. But later, when he's in class, the bells are neatly attached at the end of each tip. (edit) In this episode, Hal and Lois discover a second bathroom in a closet and promised to keep it a secret. (edit) At the start of the harvest dance, Malcolm is wearing a yellow shirt under his jester costume, later he is wearing a white shirt with blue stripes. (edit)

This episode does not have any allusions. Add some now!