Reality TV rehab... coming soon to a small screen near you?
Sure, everyone can name a few of their "guilty pleasure" TV shows, but some are guiltier than others. From "this is going to pinch a little" to "oh my god it hurts," here are some of the best shows for experiencing human pain and suffering on TV.
Pain threshold 3, or, "This is going to pinch a little"
Vicariously experiencing the cast's hangovers, punches to the face, and general loss of dignity and innocence makes me glad there's more to my life than the gym, tanning, and laundry, and that the dumbest and most embarrassing things I've done while intoxicated were not caught on camera—I hope.
Nobody's paying me to go on an adventure vacation in an exotic location, so it's nice to see someone else's amazing trip get complicated by constipation, sunburn, sand-wrestling, and dealing with jerks and slowpokes.
I can admit it: I am strangely fascinated by kids throwing tantrums and embarrassing their parents. (You too? Try the Nanny shows as well.) But there are also the twisted humiliations of spray tanning, fake eyelashes, flammable hairdos, embarrassing dance routines, and frozen smiles. (Not to worry, though: Many of the kids actually seem to enjoy the pageantry, almost as much as their stage moms.)
Pain threshold 2, or, "Whack! Please sir, may I have another?"
There's something rather Roman Colosseum-esque about the way the contestants are tossed into increasingly complex emotional and physical challenges. The contestants willingly subject themselves to intense "last chance" workouts, screamed encouragements from trainers Jillian and Bob, the public humiliation of having to weigh yourself on TV half-naked, and maybe worst of all, those horribly awkward product placements. I can't decide whether the sight of Jillian screaming at an overweight person about his or her impending death is horrible or amazing.
The biggest hazard of my job is digging food particles out of my keyboard. But these guys? Awful weather conditions, grave danger of death and dismemberment, separation from family, all for a career that most people take for granted. And I don't even like seafood that much. (RIP Captain Phil!)
Pain threshold 1, or, "Oh god it hurts. Don't. Stop…"
It's hard to find something funny to say about the way people are fascinated by emotionally unprepared young people giving birth and then struggling to give their children a halfway decent life. Then again, Farrah got smacked in the face by her mom, and I hear that was kind of awesome.
Every now and then on the addiction shows, a person comes along whose demons have made them strangely compelling and entertaining (like Alison, the huffer on Intervention), and the more attitude they give the intervention process, the better the drama. Sometimes, however, the endings are not happy and it's hard to find the bright side. Even Dr. Drew can't always convince me this is all a great idea.
This is where the fun factor of the physical and mental pain of reality TV starts getting less entertaining: A lot of the people on this series are obviously mentally ill. Sometimes I can laugh and say, "Now my basement doesn't look so bad!" but mostly I just feel the desire to switch to an episode of What Not to Wear where the biggest challenge is... shopping. For more stuff.
What's your guiltiest TV pleasure?
There's a special place in hell for anyone involved in "Toddlers & Tiaras", a.k.a. "Intro to Kiddie Porn". These parents are turning their children sex objects at a time when they should be enjoying their innocence. It's unconscionable.
Reality sucks I want scripted programs!
Oh come on! These are all trashy reality shows! Come on TV.com, how about some real guilty pleasure TV shows? Charmed, Trailer Park Boys, The Soup, Project Runway, Gossip Girl........?
agree,but i suggest you cross off amazing race from your list
all in all it's perfect
Never saw one of these....
Can't stand any of these.
hate all these shows...
anything i would have suggested is already on your list! also, the only thing worse than Toddlers & Tiaras are the parents of those kids. did you see that one parent yanking her bikini-clad 5 yr old for resisting getting her hair done? scary...
The only shows that I love that some people (not me) would consider guilty pleasures are the three CSI's.
Totally agree about Jersey Shore XD.
Interesting
Of course that douchebag of a series is goingto be on this list...hopefully there would be an explosion in the set and then...the end
Haha Steven Segal Lawman hilarious! I think that American Idol belongs on this list along with a few other shows
The placement of Survivor and The Amazing Race on this list is just wrong, especially with the others surrounding it. Otherwise, good list!
Survivor and Race do not belong on this list. A real guilty pleasure would be Steven Segal Lawman.
I just found this series on Hulu, no idea when or where it airs/aired: but it's cohosted by Ben Stein, so you know it's going to be hilarious! America's Most Smartest Model. (Yes, the title is a joke, thankfully!)
amazing race shouldnt be hear
ha i dont watch any of them :P
The Amazing Race and Survivor are awesome, particular the former. I have not watched any of those other shows.
I watch only the amazing race
I guess mine would be Project Runway...except that it isn't painful to watch, so I don't know if it would go in this category.
Anyone notice that ALL of them were reality shows? That tells you something.
I honestly don't see why Survivor and The Amazing Race are on here at all! Both of those shows are amazing and they continue to be the best reality shows on television! I'm surprised America's Next Top Model and Project Runway aren't on here. Now THOSE are guilty pleasures.
It is sad that i watch most of these shows
Putting Deadliest Catch in the same list with any of these shows is an insult.
all b b bb bbb bad
Deadliest Catch is number 1 in terms of pain and suffering
I thought Desperate Housewives was bad. But then I started getting into H2O: Just Add Water. Awful. Awful. Awful. Oh the shame!
It doesn't get any better (or worse) than the Real Housewives of Orange County
It doesn't get any better (or worse) than the Real Housewives of Orange County
SpongeBob SquarePants (I'm 22 freakin' years old!)
Give Jersey Shore its due..its completely entertaining..who else do you know that refers to himself as "The Situation"? THAT is priceless...
Wow, I can honestly say I don't watch any of those shows. I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant is one I watch though. It's just bad
The only one I like of those is Deadliest Catch.
Why are they all reality TV? My guilty pleasures are corny sci-fi that drive me nuts but are still fun. Star Trek and Andromeda.
My guilty pleasure? ...Is a glass of nicely chilled Riesling while I watch a real TV program...
Jersey Shore... The cast of Jersey Shore make it so easy to feel superior, when in fact they are no worse than most of us on our worst nights. Jersey Shore is a gritty reality show, in that it shows us people performing in the manner that they think is appropriated within their social circle but most would find sleazy. The show is something that does not come along very often and the second season will not be as good because the cast will be more aware of those watching them.
What about the Bachelor/Bachelorette. God awful television, but I can't help but watch any episodes I can catch just to see who gets the guy/girl in the end.
Toddlers & Tiaras and Little Miss Perfect, it's painful to watch those idk whats worse? the kids or the moms -_-
Jersey Shore. :)
Jersey Shore is more of a stabbing than a pinch
My guilty pleasure is Extreme Makeover: the Home Edition.