This is going to be a short review, because out of all the episodes of Alphas' second season, "Life After Death" was the least eventful, unless your biggest question was, "What's it like to have sex with Rachel?" (Answer: awkward → awesome.) And that's okay, because last episode someone DIED. It was mourning time for our DCIS team after the loss of Dani, and the episode didn't shy away from covering that thoroughly.
However, I was pretty emotionally drained from the pain and suffering after about 10 minutes. Dani was an important piece of the Alphas puzzle, and the ramifications of her death and the effect it will have on Dr. Rosen and Cameron Hicks needed to be addressed. But I think the magic number was somewhere between five and 10 minutes of air time, and after that it was time to move on. Alphas went well beyond that limit to the point where it seemed like not much happened in the episode until the very end. Like, the very, very end.
Yes, it's understandable that Rosen would be incredibly broken up about it, and there's nothing sadder than a parent outliving a child. But television is about avoiding as much negative space as possible, and it wasn't until Rosen turned that sorrow into rage that "Life After Death" took a major step. Rosen's agreement with Hicks that Parish needs to be straight-up murdered for his actions, as opposed to Clay's procedure of locking him in jail, was such a monumental moment for the characters that the show may have been better off tacking it on to the end of last week's episode than taking its tim to get there in this one. I'd love to say it worth the wait, but even though angry David Strathairn is awesome, it wasn't.
Helping fill out the rest of the episode was a story about an abandoned baby Alpha who found its temporary mommy in Gary. Oddly enough, the situation wasn't played for laughs as much as it could have been, and the show went the sweet route instead. I would have expected at least a screwball diaper change. Instead, the writers made the mystery about who the parents were and what ability the baby actually had. Perfectly fine. Except I was rooting for the baby to be able to shoot lasers out of his eyes or talk to cats, and instead, the baby's ability was the power to make people want to take care of it? Not exactly what I had in mind. But there was a solid exit in letting Bill and his wife take the kiddo home.
Finally, Rachel and John sat in a tree, doing a whole lot more than K-I-S-S-I-N-G. In addition to seeing the gorgeous Azita Ghanizada in her underwear, the best moment was obviously her dad walking into the house unexpectedly as the two lovebirds were having an awkward post-coital chat in the kitchen. But her dad was totally cool about it, announcing that he was going shopping for two hours so that things could go back to being sexy in the house. And I think that's what Rachel needed more than control over her senses. The fact that her dad didn't explode and flip a table was the sign of trust and acceptance that Rachel has been nervous about all season long. And nothing gets a woman hotter than that, so it was off for rounds two and three. Nice work, Rachel.
"Life After Death" was a deep breath between the big events of "The Devil Will You Drag You Under" and the three sure-to-be-explosive episodes that remain in Season 2. It probably didn't have to be as uneventful as it was, but everything's about to change with Rosen and Hicks ready to put Parish in a box.
– For a second there, I thought the baby had the same power as Dani, the ability to stimulate emotions, when it squeezed Gary's finger. Then I thought of the episode title and foolishly assumed that maybe Alpha powers were resurrected in other people, so Dani's death gave the baby Dani's power. But that was stupid because it wasn't true. Also, I think it would have been funny if Gary had farted when the baby grabbed his finger.
– I liked the moment between Hicks and Nina when he asked her to push him into forgetting about everything that happened to Dani. That was a desperate request from Hicks. And good on Nina for not giving into it.
– Was the baby's fake momma another Alpha with super strength? Or did she have something else? And I think Tazer Hands was a little stronger than he should have been. A punch from Bill should pretty much be the end of a fight, shouldn't it?
Follow TV.com writer Tim Surette on Twitter: @TimAtTVDotCom