Fall 2011 TV Schedule: Your Everything Guide

  • 106comments

A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT



SUNDAY

Holy macaroni, Sunday may be fall TV's strongest night: There are dead people, cartoon people, racing people, killer people, and crime-stopping people! It's like a people-palooza up in here!



7PM - 8PM

ABC
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
Season 9 premieres 9/25 at 7pm
People feel good about themselves by going to strangers' houses and pushing their own agendas and insulting the homeowners' personal taste.





8PM - 9PM

CBS
The Amazing Race
Season 19 premieres 9/25 at 8pm
Tune in to watch pairs of teammates go extreme-vacationing and almost come to blows as they compete to win a million dollars.

FOX
The Simpsons
Season 23 premieres 9/25 at 8pm
At this point the show is leisurely stepping over the shark, but whatevs. It's The Simpsons.

ABC
Once Upon a Time
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/23 at 8pm
From a couple writers of Lost (Seasons 5 and 6, so don't get too excited) comes one of two new fairytale dramas this season. In this one, there are two realities: One is our normal humdrum life, and the other is an existence where fairytales are real and guys dress like dandy fops.

FOX
The Cleveland Show
Season 3 premieres 10/23 at 8:30pm
Yup, this Family Guy spin-off is still kickin'.

FOX
Allen Gregory
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/30 at 8:30pm
Wow alert! This is an animated program on Fox that ISN'T from Seth MacFarlane! Back when he was fat, Jonah Hill created this series about a hyper-intelligent and super-rich seven-year old who's going to normal school for the first time.


Sundays 9-10pm

9PM - 10PM

HBO
Boardwalk Empire
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 2 premieres 9/25 at 9pm
Nucky Thompson (Steve Buscemi) returns to prove that with power comes an unreal irresistibility to women you would otherwise never stand a chance with in this period drama set in Prohibition-era Atlantic City.

ABC
Desperate Housewives
Season 8 premieres 9/25 at 9pm
This is the ladies' final season on Wysteria Lane. It's also quite possibly the last time you'll find any of them remotely attractive.

FOX
Family Guy
Season 10 premieres 9/25 at 9pm
Back for another season of testing your patience and "This reminds me of that time when—" cutaway gags involving pop-culture jokes.

CBS
The Good Wife
Season 3 premieres 9/25 at 9pm
Julianna Margulies stars as the scorned wife of a disgraced senator in what has become one of network TV's better dramas. This is the show's first season to air on Sunday night (it used to air on Tuesdays).

SHOWTIME
Dexter
Season 6 premieres 9/25 at 9pm
Here comes the religion season! Rumor has that the serial-killer serial killer Dexter (the always fantastic Michael C. Hall) finds God this season, Saran Wraps him to a table, and cuts his eyes out with a grapefruit spoon.

AMC
The Walking Dead
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 2 premieres 10/16 at 9pm
AMC's runaway hit returns with more than twice as many episodes as Season 1, but without twice the budget! Don't be surprised if, to cut costs, most of the zombies are so fresh they look just like normal human beings.

FOX
American Dad
Season 7 premieres 9/25 at 9:30pm
Seth MacFarlane's third program of the evening. Of the evening! Man, that guy is rich.


Sundays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

CBS
CSI: Miami
Season 10 premieres 9/25 at 10pm
The Sunglasses Brigade arrests more creepy punks on the tip of Florida. Bad guys, you better watch this, because Horatio and his team—*puts on sunglasses*—will be watching you. YEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

ABC
Pan Am
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/25 at 10pm
With a backdrop of the famous airline during the 1960s, when models roamed the aisles and beefcakes lingered in the cockpit, this drama really makes today's Southwest Airlines flight attendants look totally hideous.

SHOWTIME
Homeland
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 10/2 at 10pm
This thriller stars a grown-up Claire Danes as an FBI agent who suspects that a recently returned prisoner of war (Damian Lewis) might be a sleeper terrorist. Jeez, can't we trust anyone these days!?!?

HBO
Hung
Season 3 premieres 10/2 at 10pm
Thomas Jane stars as a man with a really big wang. Seriously.

AMC
Hell on Wheels
NEW! Series premiere airs 11/6 at 10pm
This new Western follows a Confederate soldier who's determined to get revenge on the people who murdered his wife. His quest leads him to lawless towns built near the Transcontinental, but ends up into jeopardy when a tribe of Cheyenne Indians defend their lands. In case you couldn't tell, it's a drama.

HBO
How to Make it in America
Season 2 premieres 10/2 at 10:30pm
Welcome to Entourage: New York! A handful of street hustlers hustle their way into your heart with their story of persistence, hard work, and sleeping with models.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


MONDAY

Take the edge off the start of a long, painful work week with a fantastic night of television! CBS features a stable of comedies, ABC and NBC offer singing and dancing, and Fox presents the most expensive television show since Million Dollar Money Bonfire! Seriously, there's something for everyone on Mondays.

Mondays 8-9pm

8PM - 9PM

ABC
Dancing with the Stars
Season 13 premieres 9/19 at 8pm
In ABC's ratings juggernaut, your favorite* stars** dance with pros to win a second chance at stardom or maintain their fifteen minutes of fame.
*loose definition **very loose definition

CBS
How I Met Your Mother
Season 7 premieres 9/19 at 8pm
Could this be the season that Ted finally meets the mother of his children? Given the fact that HIMYM has been renewed through next season, we're guessing not. But there are other things to look forward to, including Barney's wedding, Marshall's new job, and some ridiculously hot girl who somehow falls for Ted!

NBC
The Sing-Off
Season 3 premieres 9/19 at 8pm
NBC's singing competition is hosted by Nick Lachey, so if you still need proof that it's legit, you clearly need to listen to more 98 Degrees. Season 3 kicks off NBC's idea of musical Mondays.

THE CW
Gossip Girl
Season 5 premieres 9/26 at 8pm
This drama about randy teens and near-teens in high-society Manhattan is inching closer to ending, but that doesn't mean it's getting boring. There are still two threesome combinations left for the writers to make us "OMG" over.

FOX
Terra Nova
NEW! **EDITORS' PICK!** Two-hour series premiere airs 9/26 at 8pm
Spielberg! Dinosaurs! That guy from Avatar! A jazillion-dollar budget! Fact: This is the most-anticipated new show of the season and everyone will be watching. Well, almost everyone. Jake Lohausen of Muncie, Indiana is really looking forward to ABC's Work It.

Mondays 9-10pm

9PM - 10PM

DISCOVERY
American Chopper
Season 7 premieres 9/5 at 9pm
There's a reason this show about a family who customizes motorcycles is going into its seventh season: It's hecka-cheap to make.

ABC
Dancing with the Stars
Season 13 premieres 9/19 at 8pm
Because one hour of B-list celebrities tripping over their partners' toes isn't enough. Honestly, this should just be on a 24-hour loop.

CBS
Two and a Half Men
NEW-ISH! Season 9 premieres 9/19 at 9pm
The big news here is that Demi Moore's son Ashton Kutcher is taking over for Charlie Sheen in the long-running CBS' comedy. How will America react to the replacement of 40 percent of the show's men?

THE CW
Hart of Dixie
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/26 at 9pm
In this light drama, Rachel Bilson (The O.C.) plays a doctor who must take over a medical practice in rural Alabama. The series' main themes are 1. understanding cultural differences, 2. making it on your own, and 3. taking a huge leap of faith in believing Rachel Bilson could actually be a doctor.

FOX
House
Season 8 premieres 10/3 at 9pm
Big changes for House this year: Dr. Cuddy (Lisa Edelstein) has left the show and Dr. House starts off the season in prison. Otherwise it's the same medical drama it's always been! Warning: This may be the show's final season, so say your goodbyes now or you'll live a life of regret.

HBO
Bored to Death
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 3 premieres 10/10 at 9pm
Not a lot of people know this one, so let's take it seriously: Jason Schwartzman stars as a writer who moonlights as a not-so-good private detective. Zack Galifianakis and Ted Danson also star. If that doesn't convince you to watch, then we don't know what will. Maybe a cookie?

TRAVEL CHANNEL
The Layover
NEW! Series premiere airs 11/21 at 9pm
Loudmouth No Reservations host Anthony Bourdain gets a new series this season, showing would-be travelers what they could be doing in fantastic locales for a few days at time if only they didn't have an epileptic cat keeping them chained to their sedentary lives.

CBS
2 Broke Girls
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/19 at 9:30pm
Kat Dennings is fabulous in this new CBS comedy about two financially challenged women from very different backgrounds who partner up to try to save enough money to open a cupcake shop. The ladies will also need to purchase a time machine to go back to an era when owning a cupcake shop was a novel idea. But with that said, this is one of the more well-liked new comedies of the season.

CBS
Mike & Molly
Season 2 premieres 9/26 at 9:30pm
Speaking of cupcakes, Mike & Molly returns for more overweight romance and fat jokes galore. I know what you're wondering in the aftermath of Mike's Season 1 proposal to Molly: Will there be fried Twinkies at the wedding? Tune in to find out!

HBO
Enlightened
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/10 at 9:30pm
This new show from HBO stars Laura Dern as a grumpy executive who undergoes a spiritual transformation after a mental breakdown. Dianne Ladd and Luke Wilson also star.

Mondays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

MTV
Ridiculousness
NEW! Series premiere airs 8/29 at 10pm
Rob Dyrdek hosts this show compiling the best of the web's zany videos while he makes jokes that he thinks are very funny. Why hasn't anyone thought of this before? It would do great on Comedy Central or G4.

DISCOVERY
Swamp Brothers
Season 2 premieres 9/5 at 10pm
This show features two brothers who work at the second-largest venomous snake farm in all of reality television. (Real Housewives of Everywhere currently is the largest.)

ABC
Castle
Season 4 premieres 9/19 at 10pm
Nathan Fillion. You need more?

CBS
Hawaii Five-0
Season 2 premieres 9/19 at 10pm
Just so you don't embarrass yourself at parties or in chat rooms, it's Hawaii Five-Zero, not Hawaii Five-Oh. During the offseason, Masi Oka (Heroes) was promoted to series regular and Lost's Terry O'Quinn joined the cast of this re-imagining of the classic series. Plus, Grace Park + bikinis = winnage.

NBC
The Playboy Club
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/19 at 10pm
NBC (and everyone else's mother) attempts to recreate the mystique of Mad Men with a period piece set in 1960s Chicago around the legendary Playboy Club. But instead of creating snappy ad campaigns for cigarettes, these bunnies kill members of the mafia. Oops.

MTV
Death Valley
NEW! Series premiere airs 8/29 at 10:30pm
Vampires, zombies, and werewolves descend on Los Angeles in this mockumentary styled after Cops. Rule number one for these cadets: If you get your monster weaknesses confused, just shoot half-wooden, half-silver bullets into the perp's head and heart.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT



TUESDAY

Tuesday nights offer up an eclectic mix of super-popular procedurals, super-popular dancing competitions, super-popular high school musicals, and super-popular weight-loss shows; new this year are the returns of Tim Allen and Sarah Michelle Gellar to TV, even though no one invited them.


Tuesdays 8-9pm

8PM - 9PM

THE CW
90210
Season 4 premieres 9/13 at 8pm
You know what's so great about the fourth season of a high school drama? It becomes a college-school drama! You know what's great about writing a blurb for 90210? We don't even have to do any research to figure out what's going on. We just assume someone just got someone pregnant, that someone else almost committed suicide, and that yet someone else is struggling with their sexuality. We're right, aren't we?

FOX
Glee
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 3 premieres 9/20 at 8pm
Everyone's favorite Disney Channel show that's not on the Disney Channel starts its all-important third season. Like the kids on 90210, the McKinely High crew faces plenty of struggles. You know, like the harrowing decision of which Lady Gaga song to sing next.

CBS
NCIS
Season 9 premieres 9/20 at 8pm
All you need to know about NCIS is that it's insanely popular and the bad guys lose. If you don't watch it, you aren't a true American.

NBC
The Biggest Loser
Season 12 premieres 9/20 at 8pm
Because sometimes the only way to shed pounds is through extreme public humiliation. Sexy tennis vixen Anna Kournikova joins the show this season as a trainer.

TRAVEL CHANNEL
Made In America
Season 6 premieres 10/4 at 8pm
The network will claim this show is an in-depth look at how things work at some of America's most iconic factories, but we know it's really just a glorified infomercial for the country's biggest corporations. Why won't you show us what's behind the curtain, Kellogg's? Cheers' mailman John Ratzenberger hosts.

ABC
Last Man Standing
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/11 at 8pm
If you've suddenly woken up from a coma that started in the late '90s, then I have good news for you! Tim Allen is still on TV and appearing on a sitcom!

ABC
Man Up
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/18 at 8:30pm
Try not to get this one confused with Last Man Standing. That show is about one man who's trying to recapture his masculinity, this show about more than one man who's trying to recapture his masculinity.

Tuesdays 9-10pm

9PM - 10PM

THE CW
Ringer
NEW! **EDITORS' PICK!** Series premiere airs 9/13 at 9pm
If you like twists and turns that are so twisty and turny they sometimes make you fall off your sofa, you'll love Ringer, starring Sarah Michelle Gellar as a pair of twins in trouble. You'll need to lay out a cushion-y pillow raft at the base of your couch for this one.

ABC
Dancing with the Stars: The Results Show
Season 13 premiere continues 9/20 at 9pm
You watched them perform. Now watch them receive their verdicts!

CBS
NCIS: Los Angeles
Season 3 premieres 9/20 at 9pm
This spin-off featuring LL Cool J isn't as popular as original flavor NCIS. I'm calling East Coast bias.

FOX
New Girl
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/20 at 9pm
One day we will speak of Zooey Deschanel in the same way the myths speak of Helen of Troy. Until then, watch her act so adorably quirky it's annoying in this new romantic comedy.

FOX
Raising Hope
Season 2 premieres 9/20 at 9:30pm
Greg Garcia's show about a poor family raising a kid together turns two.

Tuesdays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

FX
Sons of Anarchy
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 4 premieres 9/6 at 10pm
The fourth season of this fantastic biker drama sees the dudes partnering up with a Mexican drug cartel, which causes some strife within the gang. If you don't watch this show, I'll beat you up.

BRAVO
The Rachel Zoe Project
Season 4 premieres 9/6 at 10pm
Rachel Zoe works on various projects and says "OMG!" a lot.

NBC
Parenthood
Season 3 premieres 9/13 at 10pm
This touching look at family life offers a great alternative to your own boring, over-it family.

ABC
Body of Proof
Season 2 premieres 9/20 at 10pm
Dana Delaney plays a former cranky neurosurgeon who becomes a cranky medical examiner. What, JUST being a neurosurgeon wasn't enough? Sheesh, ABC.

CBS
Unforgettable
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/20 at 10pm
Poppy Montgomery stars as a former detective with a special talent: She's smokin' hot. Like, really, really, really knee-buckling hot. If she were a planet she's be the sun—which isn't even a planet, but Mercury simply isn't hot enough. Oh, and she can also remember anything that's ever happened to her (except for her sister's murder). But really the takeaway here is that she's hot.

COMEDY CENTRAL
Tosh.0
Season 4 premieres 9/20 at 10pm
Comedian Daniel Tosh uses his show about funny and gross internet videos as an excuse to be naked all the time.

BRAVO
Mad Fashion
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/4 at 10pm
Project Runway's outrageous Chris March stars in this new reality series about a fashion designer who creates outrageous outfits for outrageous clients.

TRAVEL CHANNEL
Off Limits
Season 2 premieres 10/4 at 10pm
This show about uncovering the truths of old buildings and landmarks is hosted by Don Wildman. Seriously, his last name is Wildman—it was either renegade explorer, champion beer drinker, or MMA fighter for him.

IFC
Onion News Network
Season 2 premieres 10/4 at 10pm
Sample headline: "Onion News Network Lands First Interview With Beyonce's Baby... Network To Air Exclusive Pre-Natal Interview With Singer's Fetus."

COMEDY CENTRAL
Workaholics
Season 2 premieres 9/20 at 10:30pm
Thirty minutes' worth of jokes about pot, penises, and beer.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT



WEDNESDAY

The new kid on the Wednesday-night block is Simon Cowell's singing competition The X Factor, which lands in the U.S. for the first time and will face competition from a long-running reality show, a beloved Emmy-winning comedy, and a spooky thriller from the creator of Glee. Wednesday is a night to never ever go out.

Wednesdays 8-9pm

8PM - 9PM

THE CW
H8R
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/14 at 8pm
This new reality show puts celebrities face-to-face with regular people who hate them. Then they fight to the death in a steel cage match where the winner drinks the loser's blood from the loser's hollowed-out skull. But The CW will probably only air the parts where the celeb tries to win the hater over.

CBS
Survivor: South Pacific
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 23 premieres 9/14 at 8pm
Sexy contestants and old contestants compete to not die in the jungles of Samoa while a well-fed and well-rested camera crew documents all of their near-fatal experiences.

ABC
The Middle
Season 3 premieres 9/21 at 8pm
Patricia Heaton (Everybody Loves Raymond) stars as the mother of three kids in this send-up of the Middle American suburbs. Look for a Raymond reunion this season when Ray Romano guest-stars.

FOX
The X Factor (Part 1)
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/21 at 8pm
Simon Cowell's new singing talent show comes to the U.S. this fall, and unlike on American Idol, kids, seniors, and groups can all compete for the title of Mr. or Ms. Not Good Enough for American Idol.

ABC
Suburgatory
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/28 at 8pm
This witty new comedy follows a precocious young teen (delightful newcomer Jane Levy) whose single dad plucks her out of New York and plants in the Stepford-esque suburbs where things might be scarier than they are in the city.

Wednesdays 9-10pm

9PM - 10PM

CW
America's Next Top Model
Season 17 premieres 9/14 at 9pm
Tyra Banks returns for a seventeenth season of craziness! Who will be the latest to earn the title of Top Model and follow previous winners into obscurity?

CBS
Criminal Minds
Season 7 premieres 9/21 at 9pm
AJ Cook and Paget Brewster return for Season 7 of this rarest of rare programs: a CBS procedural that doesn't use an acronym.

NBC
Harry's Law
Season 2 premieres 9/21 at 9pm
Kathy Bates stars as a do-gooder lawyer in this surprise hit for NBC. Brittany Snow and Aml Ameen have left the program, but Mark Valley and Karen Olivo are lawyering up for Season 2.

ABC
Modern Family
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 3 premieres 9/21 at 9pm
Don't you want to be able to tell your children that you watched an Emmy-winning comedy that you weren't embarrassed to admit that you liked? Season 3 kicks off with the Dunphys and Pritchetts in Montana. Or Wyoming. Ahh, what's the difference, really? As long as it's not god-awful North Dakota!

ABC
Happy Endings
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 3 premieres 9/28 at 9:30pm
Last spring's Friends-inspired romantic comedy matches up nicely with Modern Family as Cougar Town takes a break.

FOX
I Hate My Teenage Daughter
NEW! Series premiere airs 11/30 at 9:30pm
Jaime Pressley and Katie Finneran star as the mothers of teen girls who act just like the lame chicks who teased them when they were in high school. Then they start hating them!

Wednesdays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

SyFy
Paranormal Witness
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/7 at 10pm
For when a spectral reverend rhetorically asks, "Can I get a witness!?!?"

NBC
Up All Night
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 9/14 at 10pm
Will Arnett, Christina Applegate, and Maya Rudolph star in this raising-a-baby comedy that critics are calling "not nearly as bad as the rest of the crap that's coming out."

CBS
CSI
Season 12 premieres 9/21 at 10pm
Ted Danson takes over as head honcho this season.

NBC
Law & Order: SVU
Season 13 premieres 9/21 at 10pm
Christopher Meloni has exited the best of the Law & Order franchise, but stepping in to keep the show as handsome as possible is Danny Pino (Cold Case). Also joining the Unit is Kelli Giddish, formerly of Chase.

ABC
Revenge
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/21 at 10pm
Think The Count of Monte Cristo but with female centerpieces (Emily VanKamp and Madeleine Stowe). Also, this time it's a television show and not a book or a sandwich.

DISCOVERY
Storm Chasers
Season 5 premieres 9/28 at 10pm
While you're hiding in your basement scared of half-an-inch of rain, these tough guys are seeking out the meteorological mayhem.

FX
American Horror Story
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 10/5 at 10pm
This story of a couple—Dylan McDermott and Connie Britton—who move into a haunted house comes from Glee creator Ryan Murphy; it will either be really good, really bad, or, more likely, some entertaining combination of the two.

COMEDY CENTRAL
South Park
Season 15 returns 10/5 at 10pm
Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and the others return for the second half of Season 15. Remember the last episode? The brilliant "You're Getting Old"? That one made me cry like someone killed my pony.

USA
Psych
Season 6 premieres 10/12 at 10pm
Shawn and Gus will continue faking psychic powers; I hope that wasn't a spoiler or anything. On tap this season: baseball, vampire, and Clue-themed episodes!

NBC
Free Agents
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/14 at 10:30pm
This adaptation of the 2009 U.K. series of the same name stars Hank Azaria as a guy who in real life would never get the girl he actually gets on the show. No way.

COMEDY CENTRAL
Nick Swardson's Pretend Time
Season 2 premieres 10/5 at 10:30pm
Comedian Nick Swardson comes back for a second season of sketch comedy. Make sure your bong is packed for the ride.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT



THURSDAY

So much stuff! Your DVR will be thanking Father Time when Friday rolls around, because Thursday is going to make it sore. The night is especially strong in the comedy arena with NBC's laughing block plus CBS's The Big Bang Theory, and FX's Archer and It's Always Sunny... comedy. Just remember to save a few of those laughs in a bottle to re-open on Tuesday. Tuesdays are the worst!

Thursdays 8-9pm

8PM - 9PM

THE CW
The Vampire Diaries
Season 3 premieres 9/15 at 8pm
Ian Somerhalder takes his shirt off all vampire-like in this supernatural drama that's set in a town with a really relaxed attitude toward frequent murder. Then our own Price Peterson gives you the play-by-play with weekly photographic recaps.

ABC
Charlie's Angels
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/22 at 8pm
Minka Kelly stars in this re-imagining of the classic '60s series about female superspies who must be at least nines or tens to enlist. But preferably tens. After all, it IS a matter of national security.

NBC
Community
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 3 premieres 9/22 at 8pm
Community is FUNNY. That's our professional opinion.

CBS
The Big Bang Theory
Season 5 premieres 9/22 at 8pm
After four seasons and as many notches in Leonard and Raj's bedposts, it's time for one of us to finally speak the truth: Penny has questionable judgment in men.

FOX
The X Factor (Part 2)
NEW! Series premiere continues 9/22 at 8pm
You watched last night's first part, so you may as well watch this second part. No one likes a quitter.

NBC
Parks and Recreation
Season 4 premieres 9/22 at 8:30pm
That cute, hip chick at the coffee shop likes Parks and Recreation, but her boyfriend thinks it's just a rip-off of The Office. Now's your chance.

CBS
How to be a Gentleman
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/29 at 8:30pm
David Hornsby (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia) created and stars in this comedy about a preppy wimp who learns how to be a real man from his new friend (Kevin Dillon). Like mom always said, "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." This show isn't that good. And yes, that was being nice.

Thursdays 9-10pm

9PM - 10PM

THE CW
The Secret Circle
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/15 at 9pm
What happens when a young teen moves to a new town and discovers she's one of a long line of witches? Dollar signs flash in CW execs' eyes! Cha-ching!

ABC
Grey's Anatomy
Season 8 premieres 9/22 at 9pm
Yep, this one's still got a heartbeat. Season 8 opens with Meredith in danger of losing her job.

CBS
Person of Interest
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 9/22 at 9pm
A rich guy creates a computer program that can help identify people who will be involved in a future crimes, and hires an ex-CIA agent to help him stop said crimes. Seriously, that's the plot. And it actually sounds kind of good.

NBC
The Office
Season 8 premieres 9/22 at 9pm
James Spader is the new honcho at Dunder-Mifflin, but we're still waiting to find out who will be named Regional Manager of the Scranton branch. Miss u already, Steve Carell!

FOX
Bones
Season 7 premieres 11/3 at 9pm
Will they or won't they? Oh wait, they did? When? Last season? Why are we still watching this show?

NBC
Whitney
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/22 at 9:30pm
Comedian Whitney Cummings stars in this romantic comedy that will be canceled by Episode 3.

Thursdays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

FX
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 7 premieres 9/15 at 10pm
Rob McElhenney (Mac) has gained 50 pounds since last season, just to make you laugh. And you know what? It's going to work.

NBC
Prime Suspect
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 9/22 at 10pm
In this remake of the cherished U.K. show, Maria Bello plays a strong-willed female detective in New York who must earn the respect of her male coworkers. And nothing commands respect like an outrageous hat.

CBS
The Mentalist
Season 4 premieres 9/22 at 10pm
Patrick Jane (Simon Baker) is a man with keen observation skills, so of course he knows how handsome he is.

ABC
Private Practice
Season 5 premieres 9/29 at 10pm
Entering its fifth season of making Grey's Anatomy look better than it actually is.

FX
Archer
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 3 premieres 9/15 at 10:30pm
How many international hotties will Archer bang this season? Not as many as you, you devil! (Note that like you/Archer, this listing is a bit of a tease; the show is only airing three new episodes before going back on hiatus until early 2012.)

FX
The League
Season 3 premieres 10/6 at 10:30pm
But I was really wondering what the show would have done if there was a NFL lockout! Could these guys make a fantasy basketball version, please?

MTV
Good Vibes
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/27 at 10:30pm
This animated show features two bros surfing, picking up ladies, and partyin'.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT



FRIDAY

At some point in the last few years, the Secret Society of Network Executives gathered in their mysterious mountain hideout and decided that Fridays should heretofore be referred to as "Sci-Fridays." Yes, bigots that they are, they presumed that people who watch science-fiction obviously don't go out on the weekend, so there's a sweet stockpile of series that lean toward the geek persuasion. Not cool! (The stacking of the shows on Fridays, not the shows themselves.) But hey, at least Fringe is still alive and kicking!

Fridays 8-9pm

8PM - 9PM

CBS
A Gifted Man
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 9/23 at 8pm
This new medical drama stars Patrick Wilson as a cocky surgeon who lives life like a cocky surgeon should: by burning money and makin' it rain! But when the spirit of his recently deceased ex-wife shows up to guide him down a different path, he becomes a changed man. Wait, his dead ex-wife nagging him from beyond the grave is his "gift"?

FOX
Kitchen Nightmares
Season 5 premieres 9/23 at 8pm
In this show, kitchens talk about their worst fears. Either that, or celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay screams a lot.

THE CW
Nikita
Season 2 premieres 9/23 at 8pm
Maggie Q returns as the titular spy with legs as long as telephone poles. Seriously, have you seen her? She's built like a grasshopper!

NBC
Chuck
Season 5 premieres 10/21 at 8pm
The action comedy moves to Friday nights for its final season, which sees Chuck and Sarah married and filthy rich, and Morgan with a copy of the Intersect possibly uploaded into his brain. Oh, Morgan!

Fridays 9-10pm

9PM - 10PM

DISCOVERY
Man, Woman, Wild
Season 2 premieres 9/2 at 9pm
It's just like Man and Wild to settle their differences once a woman comes along. Wussies.

SUNDANCE
Unleashed by Garo
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/9 at 9pm
If you name your kid Garo Sparo, of course he's going to become the star of his own fashion-based reality show.

CBS
CSI: NY
Season 8 premieres 9/23 at 9pm
Wait a sec, there's crime in New York!?

NBC
Dateline NBC
Season premiere airs 9/23 at 9pm
Still going strong.

FOX
Fringe
**EDITORS' PICK!** Season 4 premieres 9/23 at 9pm
If this show makes the same exponential leap in quality as it did between Season 1 to Season 2 and then again between Season 2 and Season 3, then Season 4 will make your heart explode. You've been warned!

THE CW
Supernatural
Season 7 premieres 9/23 at 9pm
The Winchester brothers return for more cross-country spook-slaying after annoying Cas so much that he decided to become God.

TRAVEL CHANNEL
Ghost Adventures
Season 6 premieres 9/23 at 9pm
You'd think this was a show about a ghost couple who they travels around the world, but sadly it's just about three guys who hunt ghosts.

NBC
Grimm
NEW! Series premiere airs 10/21 at 9pm
Remember those fables and fairy tales your sweet grandmother used to tell you? Well, they're real and those critters will tear your face off and use it as a napkin. Thankfully there's a Portland cop out there who's one of a long line of special people who can stop these baddies... provided he stop stuffing his mouth with Voodoo Donuts for a few seconds.

Fridays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

DISCOVERY
Swamp Loggers
Season 4 premieres 9/2 at 10pm
Someone said, "Let's make a reality show that follows loggers in the swamp." Discovery said, "Okay."

CBS
Blue Bloods
Season 2 premieres 9/23 at 10pm
This under-the-radar drama follows a family of New York City cops and stars Tom Selleck as the city's perfectly mustachioed police commissioner. Fans who stuck it out until the end of Season 1: Is anything interesting happening with the Blue Templar yet?

TRAVEL CHANNEL
The Dead Files
NEW! Series premiere airs 9/23 at 10pm
In this reality series, a homicide detective and a psychic medium team up to haunt ghosts, explain unexplainable phenomena, and maybe—just maybe—find a little romance.

DISCOVERY
Gold Rush: Alaska
Season 2 premieres 10/28 at 10pm
A few years ago, someone at Discovery asked, "Hey, do we have a show about gold miners in Alaska yet?" The rest is history.

STARZ
Boss
**EDITORS' PICK!** NEW! Series premiere airs 10/21 at 10pm!!!!
In addition to having one of the coolest show titles of the season, this drama about the mayor of Chicago stars Kelsey Grammer. It's got to be better than Hank, right?


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


A new fall season means a whole new TV schedule to get used to—so to make things easier, we've compiled a handy programming guide, complete with listings for all the major networks, notes on what's new, and what-to-watch recommendations from your trusty TV.com editors. Now you won't have to ask your mom! Simply click the links below to navigate between the days of the week and start planning your personal viewing schedule for fall.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT



SATURDAY

I'm going to be honest with you. There really isn't much on on Saturday. I'm not even sure David Spade's mom is watching TV on Saturdays. You and David Spade's mom should go run errands together. Maybe she has a Costco card.

Saturdays 8-9pm

8PM - 9PM

CBS
Rules of Engagement
Season 6 premieres 9/24 at 8pm
CBS is breaking every rule in the book by airing new episodes of this sitcom on Saturdays. Saturdays! Who is going to watch TV on Saturday? Saturday night is Call of Duty night!

Saturdays 10-11pm

10PM - 11PM

ABC
20/20
Season premiere airs 9/16 at 10pm
This long-running news magazine is great for keggers!

CBS
48 Hours Mystery
Season premiere airs 9/24 at 10pm
Don't be fooled by the title. It's only feels like 48 hours.



11PM - 12AM

NBC
Saturday Night Live
Season 37 premieres 9/24 at 11:30pm
Alec Baldwin and Radiohead will kick off the new season.


SUN MON TUES WED THU FRI SAT


What will YOU be watching this season? Share your personal viewing schedule in the comments!


Like TV.com on Facebook