5 Shows That Will Probably Outlive Us All

You are not a vampire (unless you are Malcolm McDowell, in which case yes, you are a vampire) so you won't live forever. That means that at any point in your life, you could be taken away from the things most important to you. Your family Your television shows! Like, you could be halfway through the midseason finale of Scandal and then all of a sudden you're carrying a pickaxe and mining sulfur while a cloven-hoofed jerk pokes you with a pitchfork for the rest of eternity. 

But provided you live a long, standard, healthy life, you should be okay with getting closure on your favorite series. Except for these shows below, which will probably still be going well after you chase that light in the tunnel and blink out of existence. It's a challenge! Eat some broccoli! Get a stand-up desk! Switch to Parliament Lights! Anything to stay ahead of these five shows that will probably outlive us all.

The Simpsons

At 26 seasons strong (plus renewals through Season 28 and 2018), this was the easiest show to put on the list. People born when The Simpsons started can not only drink legally now, but they probably already have cirrhosis of the liver. You'd figure that the show would end when the actors age, but have you seen Bart lately? He looks as spritely as he did back in 1987. Heck, he hasn't even changed his clothes. But for realsie, the show should stop when the voice actors demand too much money, right? Well, not only have the actors gone through several contract disputes (most recently, after several bumps to as high as $400,000 an episode, they took a pay cut to "just" $300,000 an ep), but Fox has made it clear they have no problem recasting the roles to save money. I'll do a mean Mr. Burns for an easy $100K, Fox! "Release the dogs..." See? I'm good.

Changes The Simpsons will outlive you: If you're in your 50s, you'll never see the series finale.

NCIS

A few years ago, we'd put CSI as the CBS procedural that would be the metaphorical cockroach of television, but CBS ended the series after 15 seasons with a two-hour finale that quietly said its goodbyes. And if we're talking franchises here, it's a good bet that the inadvertently entertaining CSI: Cyber won't be with us for too much longer. But hey, jumble the franchise's letters up and add one more letter and you get NCIS, another paint-by-the-numbers procedural that isn't going anywhere soon. With three series currently airing (13 seasons of original flavor, seven seasons of gluten-free Los Angeles flavor, and two seasons of bayou spicy New Orleans flavor), the NCIS franchise is almost as strong as CSI was in its heyday. Adjusting for PeakTV deflation, you can argue that NCIS is actually doing relatively better than CSI, with NCIS and NCIS: New Orleans the third and fourth most-watched programs of last season at well more than 17 million viewers per episode, behind Sunday Night Football and The Big Bang Theory. These shows will be around forever and a day.

Chances NCIS will outlive you: Born after 1980? Your grandchildren will still be watching Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Jr. fight space terrorists on NCIS: Alpha Centauri. 

Dancing With the Stars

How is this show still on? While American Idol and The Voice and Look Ma! I Can Sing on the TV! saturated the singing reality-competition genre, Dancing With the Stars has cornered the market on dancing and has largely gone uncontested. People love to watch other people dance! It's a scientific fact. Add to that the stone-cold truth that ABC has considerably lowered the bar on what constitutes a "star," our celebrity culture produces a million "stars" a year, parent company Disney uses the franchise as an extra promotion machine for its many properties (Disney Channel, ESPN, ABC Family/Freeform, and pretty soon everything), and washed-up and disgraced celebs grasping for one more shot at fame will do anything to get on camera again, and DWTS has no problem filling its shelves with so-called "stars" twice a year. The fascination with reality shows fluctuates, and even if DWTS goes off the air, it will be back at some point, eventually. 

Chances Dancing With the Stars will outlive you: If you have an AARP card, then definitely. If you're still young enough to cha cha, then we'll downgrade it to probably.

Survivor

CBS's reality show that doubles as an effective diet plan has been going strong since 2000 and is about to drop its 32nd cycle on us. And relatively speaking, Survivor is not exactly suffering for ratings! In fact, after hitting a series low with 10.82 million average viewers in 2013 for Survivor: Caramoan, the following two cycles have both increased viewership thanks to new twists on the game that gave it some new energy. Normal people love watching others get filthy and backstab each other, I guess. And if the international arms of the franchise can survive three contestants dying during filming, then it will take a lot more than death for it to go off the air. 

Chances Survivor will outlive you: The show's motto is "Outwit. Outplay. Outlast." So basically, you stand no chance. 

Supernatural

In its sixth, seventh, and eighth seasons, the talk heading into every Upfronts (the week when networks decide which shows they're canceling and renewing) was whether or not Supernatural would escape the reaper's scythe like the Winchester brothers had so often done onscreen. We worried and worried and worried, and then Supernatural would appear on the schedule for one last go. Since then, we've done a 180 and expected Supernatural to be renewed, and The CW has repeatedly said, "We'll keep on Supernatural-ing as long as stars Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki want to Supernatural," and word on the set is that the two Js are still having a blast. AND the show is doing better this season than it did last season. This will probably dry up before the others on the list do, but can't you see Jared and Jensen doing this until they're 70 and "Carry On My Wayward Son" is celebrating its 80th anniversary? Especially if Jensen keeps using that magical anti-aging elixir that's made from tortoise placentas. He could pass for 12 if he wanted to.

Chances Supernatural will outlive you: Sorry grandmas and grandpas, the Winchesters aren't going anywhere soon. But hey, maybe they'll be able to pull you out of hell.

– I didn't include Law & Order because that show is coming to its end pretty soon, I think. A better option for growing very old is Dick Wolf's new obsession, the Chicago franchise, which is in talks to expand to a fourth series. However, it's too early to tell how long Chicago Anything will be around.

– The Voice is another easy choice to put on this list, but I was shocked at just how new the show still is. It only debuted in 2011! Let's wait and see with this one. Especially with the once unstoppable American Idol calling it quits this year as a precedent.

Which shows will outlive you?