Whaddaya know, it's our favorite weekly column about the week's greatest and worst TV moments, back from the dead! Did you miss us? We thought so—the feeling's mutual. Here are all of the televised moments we've oooh'd and eeew'd about over the past seven days:
Watching the athletes' parents react to their kids' performances is often equally as entertaining, if not more so, than the events themselves.
Bryan Singer's H+ web series
What happens when we're advanced enough to have the internet hardwired into our brains? Well, after we watch porn 24/7, we DIE. This great-looking web series promises dozens of short episodes that reveal the apocalyptic dangers of playing Scramble With Friends all the time.
Breaking Bad gets artsy
Sunday's episode was full of cinematographic gems! Walter and Jr. got new cars, Skyler went for a swim, and time kept tick-tick-ticking away for Walter. Gorgeous stuff and a reminder of why the AMC hit will be film class fodder forever.
Hard Knocks is back!
We were weary of HBO's inside look at the NFL this season (the Dolphins? Really?), but once again, the excellent sports documentary series showed us how well it's able to mine stories in the premiere. Too bad the Dolphins will still finish 2-14.
Gary moves into the Alphas offices
Monday's episode of the great Syfy series was packed with all sorts of great side stories, but the best was autistic Gary's move out of his house and away from his legitimately concerned mother as he slowly gains independence. For a show about people with superpowers, this was refreshingly grounded in a reality we can understand and further proved that Alphas is a show deserving of more attention.
Comedy Bang Bang... LIVE!
Tim caught the live tour of the hilarious IFC comedy and won't shut up about how funny it was and how much of a comedic genius Paul F. Tompkins is. We get it, Tim, stop bothering us!
The love-fest between American gymnast Gabby Douglas and The Vampire Diaries' cast
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is just as heinous as expected
We know people are going to watch it, and we know they won't be watching because it's good, but TLC's blatant exploitation (and, let's face it: celebration) of a young girl's uneducated lifestyle is poor form even if the ratings hold up.
Did he or didn't he fire his Newsroom writers? The showrunner said he didn't after a report said he did, and further investigation proves that he may have buttered up the truth and that the original report wasn't entirely accurate. There are scoops of irony all over this mess given that the HBO show is all about truth in journalism, but honestly, it just feels like a mudslinging contest between the cantankerous and wordy scribe and the bloodthirsty media that wants to tear him down.
So many reruns
Author Bret Easton Ellis's STILL-ONGOING Twitter rants about gay TV actors
And please don't get me started on the gay The Big Bang Theory. I'm too tired to go there. Gayness personified. Another terrible CBS sitcom.— Bret Easton Ellis (@BretEastonEllis) August 10, 2012
As a once-respected author and pop-culture distiller, Ellis has a pretty large following of readers. It's too bad his opinions have become so terrible lately.
What made your list of TV loves and hates this week?