Phew! Upfronts are over, guys! We did it! We suffered through the good and the bad together, stayed up late writing stories about Smash getting canceled together, and ate cold leftover spaghetti from a can because we didn't have time to cook anything together. Now we can relax for two minutes until the summer season starts. How are you going to spend your two minutes of down time? I'm going to spend it reading this story about the good and bad things that happened on TV in the last seven days!
New Girl's strong end to a strong season
Winston took pranking too far in an attempt to derail Cece's wedding at Schmidt's urging... but it was okay because Cece didn't want to marry Shevrang, and Shevrang didn't want to marry her. Also, the S.S. Nessy goes into hiatus sailing strong.
Warehouse 13's ode to film noir
Pete and Myka got sucked into a 1940s noir mystery, complete with black
and white film, fedoras, tragic starlets, and old-timey slang. OLD-TIMEY
The Mother was finally met! (By us, at least)
Kids, after eight seasons we finally know what Ted Mosby's other
half looks like... and even though HE still hasn't met her, we've got
all of Season 9—which will take place entirely over the course of Barney
and Robin's wedding weekend, with the rest of the gang all meeting her
before Ted does—for that.
The Office ends on a high note
The Office's series finale wasn't perfect, but it was close, with
happy endings galore and closure for both the characters and the
long-term fans. And we got our wish when Michael Scott returned for a
brief but satisfying cameo that totally left us wanting more. Altogether
now: That's what she said!
Rectify's Goatman takes Daniel for a trip
Sundance's gorgeous character study outdid itself this week with
religious metaphors tied to actual religious practices, one of 2013's best performances to date (Aden Young, your
TV.com Acty Award is waiting), and an incredibly shocking ending that
literally took someone's breath away. But it was the stranger with the stolen goats and the psychedelic journey he took Daniel on—and the implied meaning of it all once the episode was finished—that really made this hour such a challenging and rewarding ride. One of the year's best episodes of
television. Heck, one of the year's best pieces of art.
Jimmy Kimmel does the Upfronts again
At ABC's presentation during the desperate-plea-to-advertisers known as the Upfronts, Kimmel spoke truth after truth: Networks put out a bunch of crap, and the advertising agencies are
idiots for spending money on it. He called CBS smug (which CBS
didn't mind), made fun of his own network, and kicked NBC in the balls
with this one: "NBC lost to Univision this year, and their strategy next
year is to oppose immigration reform." Ouch.
Aww heck, more Kimmel, this time with The Baby Bachelor
We'd watch this. And would expect Baby Bachelor Pad.
Arrow bounces all around the emotional spectrum
The CW's superhero show cranked the feelings dial to 11 during its Season 1 finale. There were epic kisses, John Barrowman SHOUTING AT
EVERYONE ABOUT EVERYTHING, and the unexpected and sad death of Tommy.
With his mom presumably in jail, his best friend dead, and a small
section of the city turned to rubble, how will Oliver cope in Season 2?
The Vampire Diaires crams roughly seven-dozen plot points into its finale
As the saying goes, ain't no party like a Mystic Falls party 'cuz a Mystic Falls party includes surprise stabbings, decapitations, and explosions. "Graduation" was a crowded, messy, rollicking end to an uneven season, resetting the deck for next year with some potentially fruitful twists—and hopefully, a rejuvenated sense of fun.
The Mindy Project earned our interest in a second season
Mindy Kaling's freshman comedy finale'd this week with lots of relationship drama, a few excellent Morgan Tookers moments, and plenty of awkward humor, plus some Season 2 setup and even an URST-y Mindy-Danny tease, all of it coming together to put a solid cap on an enjoyable first season. Yeah, the show was uneven in the beginning and still has some work to do, but it deserves its status as one of the only new comedies to survive the great sitcom massacre of 2013.
OUAT's finale throws the 'shippers a bone
The Season 2 capper was as crazy as the series deserved, but gave long-suffering Swan Queen supporters all the proof they need to feel less crazy.
Thanks to TV.com user @jamesbond for the F-T-W-T-F .GIF!
Elementary's Moriarty is... Irene Adler?
Elementary revealed its Moriarty and it was, in fact, Irene Adler, Sherlock's supposedly dead lover, played by Natalie Dormer. While it was clever for the show to blend two of Holmes' most iconic characters into a single entity, we couldn't help but feel like we saw something similar play out with Oliva d'Abo's Nicole Wallace on Law & Order: Criminal Intent. That aside, Johnny Lee Miller knocked the rattling of Sherlock's world out of the park, and we took a great deal of pleasure from Watson being the one to figure out how to catch Moriarty/Irene.
The networks' new comedy pickups for 2013-2014
Yeah yeah we've only seen trailers so far, but by and large the fall's new sitcoms seem more laughable than laugh-inducing. Hey-o! With lines like that, maybe we could write for one of them.
Downton Abbey won't air in the U.S. until January, as usual
Downton comes to the States on January 5, 2014, but PBS said they were going to try to make the U.S broadcast align with the U.K. broadcast because otherwise everyone just downloads it anyway! Clearly they didn't try hard enough.
Fifty Shades of Don Draper on Mad Men
What a douche.
Republican using Arrested Development to attack Obama
Hey, keep the cult comedy out of your bipartisan bickering, jerks! (But okay, the Joe Biden bit was funny.)
The never-ending torture of Game of Thrones' Theon Greyjoy
Okay, we get it. He's being tortured. Can we move on with this already?
What's on YOUR list of TV loves and hates this week?