Glee, Detroit 1-8-7, and The Comedy Central Roast of Donald Trump

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What to watch on Tuesday, March 15.

If you're anything like me, most of the clocks in your house are STILL wrong. This can cause a lot of problems when it comes to ordinary everyday activities. For example, I have been eating breakfast at dinnertime for some reason? Also I forgot to pick up my kids from soccer practice two days ago. (Oh, they'll be fine.) Anyway, the time change can make things very tricky! Thank goodness for DVRs, which inherently KNOW what time all my stories are on... Lord knows *I* will never remember! Hopefully my DVR records all these babies:


8pm, Fox
Glee
Oh man, this could be trouble: Tonight the glee club opts for ALL-ORIGINAL tunes. But what happens when America finally realizes it's fallen in love with a MUSICAL? The party could be over! Also Quinn sets Rachel in her sights and Brittany continues to be the funniest/weirdest lady in primetime?

10pm, ABC
Detroit 1-8-7
Bring your best power sander because things are about to get GRITTY, you guys! More very terrible things happen in Detroit tonight as a young street artist gets totally murdered and Detective Fitch gets some shocking news from his ex. These people all need a beach vacation.

10pm, MTV
Teen Mom 2
The Teen Mom series has always been one of the scariest shows on television. But this season the moms are super unsympathetic, right? I mean, I GUESS I feel bad for these teens who messed up their lives like this, but also they're bad parents? I'm very conflicted because this IS entertaining. Oh well, tonight Leah and Corey—get this— FIGHT, and also Chelsea and Adam—get this—BREAK UP.

9pm, WE
Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best?
Joan Rivers's new reality show is probably closest in spirit to The Anna Nicole Show, what with its sunny tone, obviously contrived situations and transfixing leading lady, but Rivers's always-on persona is a much-less guilty pleasure than the late Anna Nicole Smith's. It's just a regular pleasure. Not that I believe in the concept of "guilty pleasure" to begin with. Pleasure is pleasure. Ugh, that sounded gross. Anyway! In tonight's episode, Joan and Melissa don zany wigs during a therapy session before Melissa is rushed to the hospital for a possible pregnancy-related scare. Oops.

10:30pm, Comedy Central
The Comedy Central Roast of Donald Trump
You know in the past whenever comedians have roasted their famous peers they'd end their speeches with a quick sentimental moment? What ON EARTH will people say about Donald Trump during that moment? He's a walking nightmare with cotton candy hair and the personality of a rotten pumpkin. Good luck with that, comedians. On the upside, there might be a ton of uncensored F-bombs? I genuinely love all the un-bleeped cussing on late-night Comedy Central. Simple pleasures!

PLUS ALL NEW EPISODES OF...

Onion SportsDome, 8 p.m., Comedy Central
The Biggest Loser, 8 p.m., ABC
Million Dollar Listing, 9 p.m., Bravo
Only in America with Larry the Cable Guy, 9 p.m., History Channel
Raising Hope, 9 p.m., Fox
V, Season 2 finale, 9 p.m., ABC
What Not To Wear, 9 p.m., TLC
Traffic Light, 9:30 p.m., Fox
Lights Out, 10 p.m., FX
The Real Housewives of Miami, 10 p.m., Bravo
Top Shot, 10 p.m., History Channel
Tosh.0, 10 p.m., Comedy Central
My Life as Liz, 11 p.m., MTV

What are you watching tonight?

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