Is Damages Done?

... The latest program to (possibly) get canceled as a direct result of our country's rapidly decreasing collective IQ and rapidly increasing obsession with Jake and Vienna is FX's devastatingly underwatched legal thriller Damages. TV Guide's Matt Roush says "it really is over for Damages" despite no official word from FX (FX told me there has been no decision made yet on bringing the show back for a fourth season). The ratings for the twisty program were pretty abysmal, so this wouldn't be much of a surprise, just another unfortunate result of our national stupidity. [TV Guide]

... Even Academy Award-winner and Penelope Cruz-banger Javier Bardem (No Country For Old Men) wants to be on Glee. Bardem, who can basically do any project he wants to, is "expected to appear" in the Fox song-and-dance show next season as a rock star who buddies up with Artie. I don't know what sort of sorcery the producers of Glee are pulling to get everyone so darned interested in this show, but I'd like to borrow some to use on that cute girl in Accounting. [EW]

... Former 90210er and Meghan Fox-banger Brian Austin Green may be headed to Desperate Housewives. Green is being courted to play a new Wisteria Lane Lothario who makes the show's cougars hungry for some man-meat. Man, I feel so disgusting after writing that last sentence. Must... clean... filthy... hands... [TV Guide]

... My Boys news: Though Jordana Spiro and Kyle Howard were forced to leave other projects due to contractual obligations to the show, costar and stud muffin Reid Scott has found a part-time job. He'll join Showtime's The Big C as Laura Linney's oncologist. I apologize for not knowing who Scott is banging, but I bet she's pretty smokin' hot. [Deadline Hollywood]

... None of you have written in asking us to provide more coverage of Hannah Montana, so to none of you, here you go! The final season of the Disney hit will feature plenty of guest stars, including Sheryl Crow, Dr. Phil, Jay Leno, Ray Liotta, and Kelly Ripa. That begs the question: "When did Ray Liotta sink so low?" [THR]

... One television show is considering dropping a bomb on one of its characters next season. EW's Michael Ausiello has one of his frustratingly fun Blind Items up, and he says an hour-long drama is thinking about giving one of its major characters an HIV-positive diagnosis. Nothing is a done deal, but if it does happen, expect it to be a major talking point when it surfaces. Also, expect several mandatory safe sex PSAs during the whole hubbub. [EW]

Follow writer Tim Surette on Twitter: @TimAtTVDotCom

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