New girl Rachel, sick of being made fun of for being a virgin and gifted with some sort of mind control power thanks to the lightening storm, utilized her power for what she perceived as good when she founded a khaki and cardigan clad group called “Virtue.”
The hard part about judging Rachel was that even though her methods were terrible and her motivation not entirely altruistic, the results of her brainwashing DID have their positives. Sort of. I guess. Okay, not really. The ASBO gang was horrified to realize that the local youth they typically hung out with were suddenly no longer interested in drugs, drinking, or sex; which wouldn’t have been a bad thing had the affected individuals made their own decisions. Unfortunately, Rachel’s brainwashing effectively took away their autonomy, which negated any of potential good her group could have done. Would it be great if Kelly applied herself and furthered her education? Absolutely. Is Alisha’s promiscuity a possible symptom of low self respect? Sure. But not necessarily. Not every woman who rocks a push-up bra is compensating for something and to imply otherwise reeks of slut-shaming.
With that said, don’t make fun of virgins. They’re people too.
With Curtis and Alisha firmly under her spell, Rachel and her God Squad overtook the community center and set their sights on converting the youth of London to their cause, kind of like fleshy Cybermen. Simon, Nathan, and Kelly armed themselves with rubber gloves and iPods to escape her influence and restore the natural order of debauchery to their formerly degenerate peers. The plan fell to pieces pretty quickly, ending with a converted Kelly and a possible new face in the form of Nathan’s masked bike rescuer.
Simon disappeared, literally and figuratively, possibly to pine for his popsicle probation officer, Dead Sally, in the freezer of an unused store room. He’s such a headcase. We’d be, like BFFs if he was an actual super powered person, even with his pet corpse and creepy videotaping. He just wants to be loved, man, and right now, Dead Sally is the only game in town.
Progress was made though! After Nathan took his unfortunate swan dive from the roof of the community center, the surviving ASBO members went for drinks, including Simon. They even conversed with him! He offered Kelly a DVD and told her to watch it later and while I was half-expecting one of her traditional defensive retorts, Kelly was kind and later, clearly touched by the clips of Nathan that Simon had pulled from his files.
Nathan ended up all cozy in his coffin when he took it upon himself to don a suit and save the day, motivated largely by guilt over Kelly’s plight and, I like to think, some tiny shred of loyalty toward the others. It’s very small, Nathan’s loyalty, like maybe the size of a fennel seed or a dust bunny, but it’s there. After a rousing speech celebrating our individual right to be screw ups, Nathan inadvertently revealed that the heat he had been packing to take Rachel hostage was actually a water pistol. Did anyone else sigh with relief there? Sure, his leverage was gone, but the idea of Nathan actually wasting the Virgin Rachel was a bit of a stretch for me. The death of Tony was, really, self defense, and Sally, an unfortunate accident, manslaughter at most. We can cheer for the Misfits gang, even when they’re less-than-ideal human beings because at their core, they’re all genuinely good people. While Nathan’s glorification of the rebel’s lifestyle was flawed in places, “Yeah, a few of us will OD and a few of us will go mental...,” (those aren’t details to gloss over there, pumpkin) it offered a largely hopeful message. Getting plastered and falling asleep on a park bench, the morning wake and bake, having no real direction in life...these things don’t make you bad people and they aren’t the things that define who you are. When Nathan previously spoke with the brainwashed Kelly alone, he made note of her suddenly modest appearance, but pleaded with her to “be herself” again, meaning her attitude.
Kelly was restored to her sassy self when Rachel fell from the community center, her influence on the Virtue kids severed upon her death. Unfortunately, in their struggle, Nathan also fell, despite a surprise rescue attempt from Simon, and wound up impaled because OMG OUCH.
Cue the funeral, where a weepy Kelly left an iPod in Nathan’s casket. Cue the mourning drinks and the montage of Simon’s stalkery Nathan footage that managed to be hilarious and heartbreaking at the same time. Cue...Nathan waking up in his coffin?
I don’t know if Nathan has the best of the Breakfast Club’s super powers or the worst. On one hand, YAY IMMORTALITY! On the other hand, that has the potential to get real sad and angsty later. I mean, I’ve read Tuck Everlasting, and Forever, and Interview with the Vampire and...yeah, immortality gets sad and awful later. I’d even argue that it’s kind of awful at present, with Misfits’ resident loudmouth trapped in his coffin with no apparent rescue in sight. He seems content for now, but just wait until that iPod’s battery needs to be recharged.
1. Bike dude is important, right? I bet he’s important. *wink wink*
2. What’s the expiration date on frozen corpse ladyfriends?
3. Where on Earth did Curtis find that sweater?