Simon spotted a construction crew digging up the cozy little mass grave that the super-powered Breakfast Club stashed poor dead Gary and Tony’s corpses in and sounded the alarm to the rest of the gang. They needed to work together as a team to dig up the bodies and move them somewhere else before they were discovered. They also needed to figure out who kept leaving those threatening notes in their lockers. Simon offered to put his power to use and keep invisible watch on the locker room while the rest of the ASBO kids sorted clothing donations for various charities. Unfortunately, he hadn’t yet managed to get the invisibility to manifest at will. FORTUNATELY, everyone was quick to belittle and bully him for the failed attempt, which handily jump-started a shift. Go team!
While Simon kept watch in the locker room and everyone else sorted clothes/screwed around, Kelly was called into Sally’s office to talk to Jodi. Once upon a time, Jodi called her a “slag” which led to Kelly punching her, which led to Kelly being assigned to her community service detail and getting caught in the freak electrical storm. Initially reluctant to talk to Jodi, Kelly’s view changed after she overheard Jodi’s thoughts about how she’d really like to be friends with Kelly again, despite outward appearances. In an attempt to make Jodi feel better, Kelly pointed out that her ex-boyfriend sucked... which didn’t go at all how Kelly hoped and got her a smack in the face for the effort. Mind-reading sounds like a really handy superpower until you realize that people don’t always tell the truth, even in the privacy of their own heads. Or, they can handle the truth in their mind, just not voiced out in the open for all to hear. Or, you know, some people just don’t like to hear that their ex-boyfriends sucked. It can be interpreted as a dig on them personally, especially if the criticism is coming from a source who's has already fallen out of favor.
The following morning, Kelly’s hair fell out in clumps. Apparently, Jodi also got caught outside the day it rained superpowers from the sky and she was granted the power to turn people bald. Remember that conversation we had about the X-men with crappy powers and how, for every Kitty Pryde, there’s another no-name mutant with a bird beak for a mouth?
Yeah, Jodi is one of those mutants. However, despite the general lameness of the way her power works, it could actually be traced back to a legitimate source. When she and Kelly finally talked things out and made up, Jodi revealed that she suffered from Alopecia—a disease that caused her hair to fall out. The loss of her hair was what prompted her sucky boyfriend to dump her and her power—the ability to cause anyone she touched to lose his or her hair—was really just an outlet for Jodi to make others feel the pain that she felt.
Alisha had a grand old time clubbing with her power until those googly eyes she and Curtis kept flashing each other last week started to evolve into something more meaningful. In an attempt to give Curtis that extra nudge to actually make a play, Alisha gave a literal nudge, ending in some cramped restroom sex (really?) while poor awkward Simon was on invisible recon duty. It turns out that those affected by Alisha’s powers don’t actually remember the sex they have with her, which definitely catapults her powers into the creepy, awful, rapey stratosphere. I actually think I’d take the spontaneous balding power over the walking date rape wonder. Curtis was understandably unhappy about whatever we want to call their hook-up.
So Alisha banged their nerdy volunteer supervisor in response. Remember ladies, when sex backfires, the only solution is more sex. Yet in between all of her super-powered sexin’, Alisha managed to snag her dad’s car and help dig up Tony and Gary’s bodies. Simon figured that if they hid the decaying corpses until the construction crew got around to pouring the concrete foundation of their project, they could just return them to their original spot and no one would be any wiser. They ended up stashing them in the locker room. How did no one smell that?
When the time came to move the bodies back to their concrete tomb, Alisha was nowhere to be found, and as Nathan pointed out, despite being a merry gang of young offenders, none of the ASBO five actually knew how to jack a car. They managed to steal Sally’s keys and get the corpses in her trunk, but when she came outside, getaway driver Nathan panicked and left the keys in the ignition when he hid. I know who I’m not calling when I plan my heist. Sally eventually smelled the rotting meat in her trunk and opened it, triggering a rewinding of the timeline from Curtis. The second time around, with Curtis’s warning that Sally would find the bodies, Nathan distracted her with a brick through her windshield. That boy needs to learn some subtlety.
Still, victory was theirs to savor. The bodies were stashed beneath a layer of concrete and Simon, proving that he might just be the smartest one in the bunch, used Tony’s credit card to book a one-way flight to Spain in an effort to make it look like he was still alive. It worked for everyone but Sally. I’d make some comment about her being a crazy person but it’s hard to fault her for being correct. That whole being Shygirl18 thing is still creepy, though. And Simon appears to be falling for it, not that I can blame him. Despite his role as captain of the most inept team of delinquents I have ever seen, Kelly, Nathan, Alisha, and Curtis still managed to ridicule and ignore him, triggering his invisibility, all alone on the rooftop where no one can see how secretly awesome he is.
– Curtis’s “rescue” of Alisha was so amazingly hilarious, with all the random touching. I’m also glad that they apologized, because Curtis could use a little lightening up and Alisha could use a little reeling in. See, they’re perfect for each other.
– I don’t know about the “we can just stare at each other and wank off” approach to having a healthy relationship, despite Alisha’s powers. I mean, good effort and kudos for trying, and frankly, I don’t know what else to tell them to do... but I just think that would get boring after a while. However, they’re supposed to be in high school, right? Okay, nevermind.
– Aww. Nathan still has no idea what his superpower is.