Ever a sucker for play on words, I feel compelled to admit that ben45tpy's winning submission caught me so off guard I almost choked on my tea. BUT DON'T WORRY! Everything's fine. Here are all three winners from yesterday's Open Caption contest:
From ben45tpy:
Chris: "More lap dances! In this town, money grows on one tree."
From Pacar27:
Stripper: "I'm only sitting on your lap cause I need to pay for college."
Chris: "Who needs college? I turned out fine!"
From Faithin1:
Chris: "Dude, she is stuck to my leg. This can't be good."
Today's Image: Archer
Tonight's episode of our favorite animated spy comedy is called "Lo Scandolo," which is surprisingly not the show's impish attempt at Spanglish. Rather, it's legitimately Italian for "The Scandal." Bet you didn't see that coming! In the still below, Archer is, uh, well, you decide. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!
New Open Caption (2/21) page here: http://www.tv.com/news/open-caption-the-river-27885/
I'm guessing Ms. Killian was either fired or on vacation. Hope you didn't fired, but you can always go back to your old job as host of the hit gameshow "The Running Man" from the 1987 Arnold classic of the same name.
Archer: Pay up. I told you he shaved his chest!
Archer: Lana. Lana. Lana? LANA!!
Lana: WHAT?!
Archer: Hurry up and take the picture before he starts to smell.
Malory: Sterling what are you doing ?
Archer: Mother, it's not what it looks like! I swear!
Archer: "Smells like something died in here. Oh... nevermind."
Archer: Okay, Sterling, just think. What would Coach McGuirk do in this situation?
Archer : he asked me to blow him , so i did !
Archer: OMG! He's swiss cheese!
Archer: *sniff* That wasn't me.
Archer: "He's not dead mother, he's menstruating."
Thanks for the captioning and I hope your choking didn't causes any damage! :)
Archer: "Like, literally, don't shoot him?"
Archer: Y'know what? I should have to put up with this crap. I wonder if Bob's Burgers is hiring?
Archer: "This is what happened to Unsupervised. Who's next ?"
Archer: "He's our C.I.? I thought you said he was our bad guy. Oops."
Archer: "Crap, now what did I come in here for, again?"
Archer: Is it bad if I notice how good his ass looks right after he got shot?
Archer: Woodhouse, we need more chocolate sauce, pronto!
It's got plenty of stopping power! You see, he was going to breathe and I stopped him.
I'm literally heartbroken that he's dead...well, figuratively. But he is literally dead.
Click
Archer: Safety off.
Click
Archer: Safety on. OK, now I got it.
Malory: Sterling, I hope you milked him dry...
Sterling: Phrasing.
Malory: ...before you blew his brains out....
Sterling: Phrasing, mother.
Malory: ...and got his essence all over my new Persian rug!
Sterling: PHRASING!!
Archer : I will never get involved in any BDSM relationships anymore!
BABUUU!
Lana: Ugh! Archer! Do you have an erection?!
Archer: Well, uh, it's not because he's dead or anything... or that he's naked... or that he's a guy...
Archer: Lana! Did you have to shoot him when I was right beside him?! You could've shot me! And more importantly, you got blood on my suit!
Archer: Looks like this "shoot first, ask questions later" policy really doesn't seem to work as an interrogation technique.
Also, a request: I don't think there has been an open caption image from Person of Interest yet. It would be fun to try to come up with one-liners for Reese, so could we get a picture from that show soon? Please.
From the drivethru speaker: Did you want fries with that?
How about fReese with a can of whoop ass?
from the drivethruspeaker: Did you want that super-sized or bootylicious??
Archer: Woodhouse! Get the lemon pledge too, now there's blood as well as naked ass sweat to get out of the chair.