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Open Caption: Baby Daddy Rubber Baby Buggy Bumper

Good morrow, brothers. How art thou(s) on this blessed Hump Wednesday? Bet you didn't know I'm fluent in Olde English. Or that Hump Wednesday was a legitimate holiday back in the 1600s. Or that I love to make up historical facts. Here are your winners from yesterday's contest:


From ToddMurray:

Hanna: "One radish and I'm stuffed!"
Aria: "You can eat a whole radish? Cow!"


From heartzkidnapper:

Director behind scene: "Girls, this food is not to eat, it is just for the scene!"
Hanna: "Shit!"
Aria: "Don't look at the plate, don't look at the plate... geez, I can't hold myself anymore!"


From Geek_Queen:
Spencer: "Hanna, we're planning on playing hooky, not hooker. Go change."



Today's Image: Baby Daddy

I know you guys have just been DYING for tonight's season premiere, I hear you dreaming about it while you sleep and it's uber-creepy (the dreams, not that I watch you while you sleep). Anyway, it's finally here! Rejoice! In the premiere, new father, Ben—who doesn't know he's a father until his baby gets left on his doorstep—decides to raise his surprise child with the help of his insanely selfless friends and family. Fun fact: the baby is played by twins, just like Full House! OMG COULD THIS BE THE NEXT FULL HOUSE?! Probably not, but wouldn't that be cool? In the still below, Ben attempts to change his first diaper. Interesting system he has there, by covering his eyes but leaving his sense of smell completely unarmed. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!

Check out all of our recent winners on TV.com's Open Caption Pinterest Board.

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Baby: Dude, I'm a girl. Why the goggles?
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Ben: Isn't there an App for this?!?!
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Baby: I'm doing to this diaper what this show will do for your career's.
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for should be to.
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Baby: Oh god, oh god, oh god... I hope I take after my mother!
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Ok kid, you've been on a strick coal diet since you got here. If you don't poop daddy a diamond, I'm selling you on e-bay.
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God damn Friends re-runs!! I'll show you how to play "Ultimate Fireball"!!
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Hmmm, maybe I should'a thought about using this much protection when I was handeling your mother...
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This week on Myth Busters... Do humans taste of chicken?
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I wore the goggles becausei thought i'd be swimming in Sh*t.

But it wasnt so bad, and good thing i didnt need a snorkel
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Ben: That wasn't so difficult!

Baby: It took half an hour. And what in the hell are the tongs for???
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Ben: What you just did in this diaper could be a metaphor for what we're doing to this network.
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Ben: Ick! I didn't think about it possibly going into my mouth!
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Is it coincidental that the content of the show is also the contents of the diaper
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Baby: Yeah let's see if you're still smiling, when i do another one in about 10 minutes
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Baby: This better make me as rich as the Olsens.
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Ben: I'm stealing this bit from Full House when Uncle Jesse and Joey did it... do you think the audience will notice?
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Ben: One day you'll be telling your therapist about this moment.
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Talk about a shit job.
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Ben: Thee said I couldn't make a baby by myself, looks who's laughing now!
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I have a master Degree in Mechanical Engineering, How hard can this be?
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Raising Poop
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Child star career trajectory:

Six months - On your back, older man between your legs wearing gloves.

16 years - On your back, older man between your legs without a glove.
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There was an abortion joke in there too, but I decided some self-censorship was for the best. Oh, what the hell:



16 years, two months - On your back, older doctor between your legs wearing gloves, emptying your uterus.
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Dude!!!!
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"Oh, so you're a twin? Let's mess you two up like they did Mary-Kate and Ashley. First step: me changing your diapers."
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Ben : Daddy is good , daddy is going to change your diaper , Daddy loves you ....Do you love him? Baby : -<>-
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Baby = network

Dad = viewers
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If you don't pee on me I'll buy you a convertible when you're older...if you can remember.
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Ben: Hey this isn't so hard!

Baby: I wish i was back with my mom..
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Ben: How does this works? Where's the clean the poop botton? Geez

Baby: Ugh, actors....Thank you mom
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Ben: At last, my creation is complete! She's ALIVE! ...and she's pooping...
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2 seconds later, a urine drenched Ben realized that he should have opted for the full face shield.
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Ben: Okay, I'm perplex and ready to go! Baby: You know I'm still going to pee up your nose, right?
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**typo** "perplex" should be "prepped"
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Ben: "All right, Hope... uh, I mean, baby. Who is in no way like the other show's baby, I might add."

Lawyers: "Good save."
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"Dammit! Wheres the Raising Hope set, I got the wrong baby!"
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If only I thought of all these safety measures before you were conceived.
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Baby: Please tell me we're not actually related.
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Ben: You know now that I think of it, your mom peed on me that night too.

Your mom was into some messed up stuff.

Let's make sure you stay in school.
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The best part about the goggles? It's a girl, not a boy. Where does he think the pee is going?
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On big step for man.... One big poop for baby.
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oops.... ONE BIG STEP FOR MAN ... ONE BIG POOP FOR BABY
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Baby: "Ah glah la blah athe"

Ben: "Don't you go giving me that again, that's what you said an hour ago and here we are back in the same situation!"
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"Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice"? HA! I don't think so.....
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