Open Caption: Kim Kardashian on Last Man Standing

You guys are scarily good at channeling the mind of Anjelica Huston. Perhaps too good. But without further ado, here are the winners from yesterday's contest:


From qbe_64:
Eileen: "Tails!"


From CurlyMC:
Eileen: "Hmm she's creepy, and she's kooky, mysterious, and spooky. I like her."


From Taccado:
Eileeen: "American Idol? If you think Simon was tough, I can tell you I'd eat him for breakfast. Which, incidentally, I once did. But that was in the crazy '80s."


Today's Image: Last Man Standing
In tonight's episode of Last Man Standing, young Mandy (Molly Ephraim) gets to meet her idol, who isn't a Nobel Prize-winning activist waving the flag of empowerment for young girls, but a socialite pretty-girl whose major accomplishments include a sex tape and a Sears clothing line. I'm so glad this country has its priorities straight. In the still below, Kim Kardashian sits with starstruck Mandy. What do you think they're saying to each other?! Post your best caption ideas in the comments.

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Young Mandy : Oh I so want to be like you

Kim : Oh that's very sweet but it will NEVER happen
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Kim (singing to herself): "Mandy, you're a fine girl..."
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The makeover is a good start but if you really want to get noticed I recommend leaking a sex tape with a quasi-celebrity, It's done wonders for my career.
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"A diamond? Who do you think I am, Megan Fox?"
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Kim : after Pimping you out , i will teach you the secret of not having STDs for the rest of your life !

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"Those can't be real..."

"Yeah they are... honey...
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Kim : i never thought playing with a fan's hair is so damn funny!

Mandy *thinking* : i never thought that Kim is so damn STUPID!
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Kim: Now you look so pretty and cute! Just like the little sister I'm conractually obligated to have.
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Mandy: So how do I look??

Kim: Quack quack quack quack quack



(P.S. - I wish I could translate. Apparently, only individuals with an IQ under 50 can understand her.)
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The Kardashian family is introducing a spin-off of their reality show called "Keeping Up Hair with the Kardashians".
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Kim: You don't quite look like a prostitute that caters exclusively to clowns yet but once i'm done with you, you'll look the part!
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Both: So, do you really think I'm pretty??

Both thinking: I'm so much prettier than her!!
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Where's your wedding ring?

Uhhhh

You did just get married a couple of months ago, right?
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Even my smile is plastic.
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A little snip here, a little tuck there, and you too can look perfect like me.
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Mandy: "Um, what are you famous for, again?"
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Mandy: "So, I don't need intelligence as long as I'm pretty, right?"



Kim: "That's right! Oh, and don't forget to not eat."
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Kim Kardashian plays with her new life-sized Barbie doll.
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No no no no no. Get some money, THEN release the sex tape. Unless it is a tape of someone with a lot of money. Of course, if you don't want the sex tape, 30 second marriages work too.
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Something...something...cocaine possession....something...drunk driving arrest...I got nothing.
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All it took was a little hair, a lot of makeup and a self-centered, self-righteous attitude and the next Kardashian Klone was ready to be released.
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Kim: "...And if you wear your hair up like this, you can be a detriment to society too!"
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