Open Caption: Lie to Me (August 9)

'Sup. It's time for the latest installment of our weekly open caption feature. Last week, we posted this stoic shot of Burn Notice's Michael Westen (Jeffrey Donovan)—and you guys responded with over 100 caption ideas! We are beaming with pride. Here are a small sampling of our favorites:

... charmed4eva112 knew the way to our hearts with a solid OC nod:
"If somebody doesn't confess to spilling the cereal, I'm going to go so Ryan Atwood on your ass!"

... No, really, we love a good TV reference. Nice work, Geek_Queen:
Even Michael Westen is tired of Gordon Ramsay.

... Same to you, BoDeans66:
"Anything Jack Bauer can do, I can do better! You want moody and intense? Done."

... From Aggie_TV_Addict:
"We ran out of spoons."

... From thewhitewizard1:
"This is what I call a fully-stocked kitchen!"

... From epsilon012:
"I think I found what was wrong with your sink."

... From dexterin08:
"Did I read that right? The recipe called for gun powder, not garlic powder??!"

... From XGalt:
"Sometimes in the field all you have is oranges, a bowl, a shotgun, and a powerful thirst for orange juice."

... There were many mentions of The Boomstick, and we liked AlexanderHerb's the best:
"Dammit Sam! I said Broomstick, not Boomstick!"

... And as MathMan33 so aptly put it, Special-K99 won the internet with this one:
"My name is Michael Westen, I used to have a breakfast. Since someone stole my breakfast I've got nothing. No fried eggs, no pancakes, no bacon. I'm stuck with this empty dish they decided to dump on me. Bottom line? Until I figure out who stole my breakfast...I'm not going anywhere!"

Up next: This confusing shot of a wheelchair-bound Cal Lightman (Tim Roth) and his seemingly doting ex-wife Zoe Landau (Jennifer Beals) on Lie to Me. Post your best caption idea in the comments!


Follow TV.com writer Stefanie Lee on Twitter: @StefAtTVDotCom

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Cal, I'm currently in the hate cycle of our love-hate relationship... so go roll off a cliff.
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SHE: "Don't worry darling, it says here that you are going to come into a lot of money and you will be able to walk again!"
He! "So your telling me, you've sold my wheelchair, right?"
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Insert sarcastic and mildly offensive comment that pisses someone off but ultimately allows cal to read his or her reaction and discover the truth.
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Cal: "It's either the painkillers or Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears are over there having a staring contest." Zoe: "Who's winning?"
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Tour Guide: "Here we see Cal and Zoe taking a breather in between their scenes for the upcoming "Rear Window" remake."
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It's seven, no wait! Twenty-two! Er...what?
Oi! Lookit! Wassat? C'mere, c'mere!
At's a rat, that is. Bigger'n my sisters flipp'n dog at that.
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Will you still need me? Will you still feed me? When I'm 64? Are you even listening to me?
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Cal: Oi! This must be what hell is like, then, is it?
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"Would you look at that. I'm sitting here in a wheel chair thinking "WTF?" while she's using some kinda hocus-pocus to balance that box of cereal against that guy's chin."
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But honey, really, I swear--It still works!
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No, really, I'm telling you, it still works!
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I hope she doesnt ask me if I have a boner, I'd hate to lie to her!
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"Will you put that down and get me out of here? I think I see nurse Ratched coming with an enema bag, and if I'm reading her right, she doesn't think much of snotty Englishmen."
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Tim Roth enjoyed being the only celebrity in the clinic, until the day the entire Jersey Shore cast was committed as well.
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Cal - Hey, Zoe, don't need to be so bad, I just told the truth.
Zoe - Cal, dear, sometimes lying is necessary ...
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Kill her with sex, they said. Silly woman doesn't realize she only has two weeks to live!!
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Hey Zoe, do you know where that LOST island is? I want to be cured.
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Oy!..... You! what you looking at?
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Cal: Pudding?
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Cal thinks to himself i don't know where i am? Who's this lady? why am i wearing pants? wheres my teeth? Who's that man with the camera?, then says"Boom goes the dynamite!" then poops himself...
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I HATE that guy. If I could get out of this chair I'd beat him to death with his own walking stick...
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Got ex-lax?
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Cal: "No Zoe, honestly, I WANTED to drive you to the airport but...well look!!"

Zoe"" I don't even have to see your face for THAT ONE!!"
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Cal: "No Zoe, honestly, I WANTED to drive you to the airport but...well look!!"

Zoe"" I don't even have to see your face for THAT ONE!!"
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"You can't go on the walkabout."
"DON'T TELL ME WHAT I CAN'T DO!"
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she moved on from breaking his balls to breaking his legs.
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One lie too many. He couldn't take it anymore.
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Cal: "Wonder how long until Foster realizes that patient gown is open in the back"
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"Now I know I'm the one who's the expert, love, but why can't these loonies tell I'm not bonkers?"
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Cal: I knew that man was lying, and yet I trusted him to drive me home...*sigh*
Zoe: I toooold you, Cal...that sciencie of yours is not trustworthy anymooore...*mmff*
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Cal: "I hope someone tells a lie soon, this getting pretty awkward."
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"Cal, I told you if we tried the "Martian Butterfly" you'd end up in the hospital"
"no, you didn't"
"liar"
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"**Cal's thought bubble** I always knew she liked it rough, but I didn't realize she would resort to force-feeding magazines to creepy men..."
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Zoe: "A wheel chair? Really Cal?" Cal: "You see love, ladies love a good 'I took a car head on to save a life and now i'm in a wheel chair story.'"

Zoe: "This book says otherwise."

Cal: "Damn... I can't tell if a book's lying..."
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Cal: I think I may have soiled myself

Zoe: That's nice.
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Cal: *Boored.*
Zoe: *Not listening.*
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Zoe: You do realise I'm letting you rot here untill you tell me what you are up to with that weelchair?
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Zoe: There's a catheter in my handbag, and I have no idea how to use it. so you better get out of that wheelchair before I'm the one playing doctor.
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Cal: Don't tell me what i can't do!!!!
Zoe: What are you talking about?
Cal: I dunno...I think i just had a flashback...
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Don't mean to bother ya love, but this wheelchair has a broken seam. Maybe you can break out the old welding equipment and patch it up?
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You can lie to me all you want, but I am not getting out of this chair until you tell me the truth!
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In Cal's English accent of course:

"Well your the patient here, not me, so get on with it"
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"How did I end up here?"
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