Yes! Way to steer clear of gutter balls! Your Once Upon a Time Open Caption entries were total turkeys (but in the good bowling kind of way). Here are the winners:

Tom: "I came up with this unique stance for bowling. It's 200 percent cooler than any other stance. I call it 'The Baller.' It's named after me."
From pcsjunior002:
Tom: "Come on, little ball of wonder, make me those millions. When my new bowling outfits take off, I'll be able to restart Entertainment 720."
From ToddMurray:
Tom: "I didn't want to put in the work to learn how to bowl, I just wanted these dope shoes. They were in Details magazine, so they're awesome."
This Weekend's Image: Once Upon a Time
Hate to break it to you, folks, but a lot of what you see on television isn't real. It's mostly smoke and mirrors and green screens. The following still from this Sunday's episode reveals what things look like before all the background art gets added in. That there is Snow White and her dad, King Leopold, in their "palace." I invite you to use your imagination to fill in the blanks of that green screen and post your best caption ideas in the comments!
By the way, lovely Open Captioners, today is my last day of writing this column, as I'm moving on from TV.com. But don't fret, the fun will continue once I'm gone! Until we meet again, keep it real!




Comments (43)
Snow: Every girl dreams of this day but I don't think every girl gets to live it out the way I am.
King: I know...um...Snow don't panic but you've got a bat in the cave. Do not turn away and face the crowd, it's green and noticable.
Snow: Will anyone notice it against this green backdrop?
King: You're right. Probably not.
Snow: Are we in Tokyo?
King: No, I don't see... oh yep, wait, there is Godzilla.
Because they ate some bad apples, the CGI team unfortunately did not make it in time for the wedding.
The kingdom is experiencing tough times, I'm afraid this will have to do for your wedding day. Also don't eat the food anybody, that's fake too.
Regis Philbin - "So let's play "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire??", the Medieval Version"
(Yes, Regis was possibly alive back then. Is that too cruel??)
Snow: What's my next line?
King Leopold: I doesn't matter. The CGI guys are replacing you with Mila Kunis.
Snow White:
Father, I know you promised to take me to Medieval Times as a wedding present, but this is ridiculous!
We'll miss you, Ms Diamond. Good luck with your future ventures.
My daughter, I am sorry but I was unable to pay construction of an entire castle. So I had the workers set up these green walls and the floor so that the painters will have less trouble filling in the blanks for your wedding pictures.
Snow White: "UGH! Ever since you hired that new decorator, this whole place looks like a Granny Smith! I hope I never see an apple again!"
I rather have digital green screen than poorly designed set.
George Lucas strikes again.
A green room gone crazy?
Hey!!! Did Shrek throwup in here again?
"Dad, I told you, matching the walls with the floor isn't the best choice... and... really THIS color?? It makes my skin look even whiter, Isn't enough I'm called that way?"
- "Everybody say shoooooooot"
Bye Ilana. Godspeed.
- "How much do you hate this wedding rehearsals ?"
Snow: Poison green? Eww! Daddy, I want the party planner to end up in our dungeon!
Best of luck to you Lady Ilana! May your impact on future projects be as great as it has been over here.
King Leopold To his Daughter : Dont Worry my Darling , ABC Promised us they will bring Merlin to transform this Green Background To a Marvelous Castle
Oh and goodbye Ilana! Best of luck in your future ventures! :)
"Oh no! The Green Lantern has ruined our wedding! Or was that the Fantastic Four...?"
It's good to be the king.
Best of all ahead, Llana.
Don't ever forget your roots, but never be afraid to sprout new branches.
King Leopold: Snow even though we lost the roof over our heads, I still want your wedding to be memorable.
Snow: "Daddy, when I said the castle should be more 'green' I meant environmentally aware."
"Oh, daddy, its such a shame Ilana is leaving TV.com!"
"Oh, yes, dear Snow, but, alas, it seems she has found a nice new opportunity for herself."
"Oh, daddy, I just really hope she'll be happy, I'll miss her terribly!"
"Yes, so will the rest of us, Snow, so will the rest of us..."
Whence came yonder green-screened adornments unto thine humble kingly abode, my liege?
Bye Ilana, we'll miss you! All the best!
Good bye and good luck, Ilana! Thanks for picking my entry in your last column! Wishing you all the best in your future endeavors!
Director: Okay, places everyone. Your motivation is "happy wedding"! And... ACTION! We're happy... we're happy... we're happy... we're giving the bride away... and oh no, the evil queen is now a dragon attacking the castle! We're running, we're screaming, we're getting eaten by a scary, scary dragon! More running and screaming, people! More running and screaming!
Snow: I wasn't aware Emerald City was a real place.
As the wall between Stoneybrook and the fantasy world becomes thinner. We have seen odd changes for the new design of the local Olive Garden.
The Queen, jealous of Snow White, casts a spell coloring the walls and floor of Snow's palace an ugly green. She admits it's not her best spell.
Snow: Uh... Dad, I think you took the whole "Going Green" thing a little too far!
"how are you all still alive? the floor is lava, the floor is lava!!!"
its funny cos i stole it from archer...
"Must... destroy... the Decepticon!!"
"Obviously we are waiting for your friend in the restroom, she's the hot one"
Hey, you got a profile pic. Great.
All the best Ilana.
Wow, Charming looks really different before the CGI team does their mojo
Leo : Isn't this place lovely my dear?
Snow : I agreen
"Because their love was so strong, the wedding pressed on despite the tragic pistachio ice cream accident."
Leo: I know the set isn't real, but what about the feast? I'm hungry.
Snow: You're hungry!? I was so hungry once I ate a poisoned apple!
Adios then Ilana, and may your life treat you well!!
Leo: "If you don't act serious in front of this green screen, I'll have your true love killed."
Snow: "You can just save it, my agent gave me the same thing last week. Do you know, will we ever get a budget?"
Goodbye, Ilana! Good luck!