Open Caption: The Big Bang Theory

I imagine the best kind of stakeout is the kind of stakeout that echoes a fifth-grade sleepover: Shawn and Gus are sleeping sounder than I do on a daily basis. Maybe I should consider a career overhaul and team up with law enforcement. Thoughts? Meanwhile, here are the winners from yesterday's contest:


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From chas031:

"The Psych weekly think tank:"
"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ"


From milkhaswings:

"Cause of Death: Delicious flavor."


From qbe_64:

....
Gus: "I six the pizza."
Shawn: "I seven the pizza."
Gus: "I eight the pizza."
Shawn: "You son of a bitch, I knew you ate my pizza!"


Today's Image: The Big Bang Theory

In tonight's episode, "The Weekend Vortex," Sheldon abides by the orthodox tradition known as "bros before hos" and chooses to host a video game party with his buddies instead of joining Amy for her Aunt's birthday. That's not going to come back to haunt him, right? In the still below, it appears that it has. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!

Check out all of our recent winners on TV.com's Open Caption Pinterest Board.

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Amy: Come on Sheldon. Give it to me

Sheldon: Amy Farrah Fowler If you are referring to coitus, then I have to remind you that I don't do that.

Amy: I am aware of that Sheldon. It is in the girlfriend/boyfriend agreement that you forced me to sign. I was talking about your Flash uniform cause I need it for tonight... I'm surprising Penny with an all girls custom party!



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Sheldon: I borrowed your spare toothbrush.

Amy: You used Gerrard.
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Amy: I'm craving human contact right now. Get over here and put your bony, child-like arms around me. (laughter)

Sheldon: Oh boy... that sounds like unnecessary touching. (laughter)

Amy: Sheldon, my loins are frothier than a test monkey after swallowing twelve nicotine patches. (big laughter)

Sheldon: Oh dear, was that by accident? (chuckle)

Amy: Sure....... if that's what you want to hear. (laughter)

Sheldon: That poor little monkey! Speaking OF.... (laughter) perhaps LEONARD can help you with this! (laughter) OH LEONARD! Can you come out here and give Amy a hand? Or whatever body part she requires. (big laughter) For the next, what? Five... no... three minutes? (laughter)

Amy: Oh, never mind. By the way, what do you think is the opposite of swallowing twelve nicotine patches? (huge laughter)
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Amy: Apparently the Mayans were right, the world ends in 2012.

Sheldon: No star trek 2?
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Amy - You're ordering another Darth Vader costume online? Seriously??

Sheldon - Yes.....section 7 subsection A of our relationship agreement clearly states that you're not my mommy.
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Sheldon: Its Star Wars, Amy! If it were Star Whores, Amy, Id go with you!



Amy: I see your lips moving, but Im not receiving...



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[Laugh track for the whole scene]
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Brilliant. Made me smile.
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Sheldon: You can't talk to me like that, CBS paid good money for my Emmys.
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"Have you seen my invisible dinosaur? He about this big, I can't find him."
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Amy: This show sucks balls!

Sheldon: Shutup and ride this bitch! We're gettin paid till 2014.
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Amy: Did you seriously just say that Big Bang Theory is better than Community? You're joking right?



Sheldon: You do realize what show you're on, right?



[2 full minutes of canned laughter because the executives at CBS are morons]
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Amy: For the last time, I AM NOT BLOSSOM!!!
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"If we accept the premise that you are more important than my 'bros', then we also must accept that our relationship has proceeded to the 'next level' which would require coitus, and I refuse to accept that."
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Amy: I did play Blossom!
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Amy, section 4, subsection 23 in the boyfriend/girlfriend agreement clearly states that I do not have to attend any familial gatherings honoring anyone that is not immediate family, or that will not be alive for the majority of 2012.
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Amy: Really Sheldon?! You don't remember me from Blossom?

Shelodn: (Internally) Whoa!
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amy: what do you have to say for yourself???



sheldon: (points at his t-shirt)
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Amy: Why not???

Sheldon: First, the Nobel Peace Prize. THEN, the piece of noble prize!!
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Amy : When i Asked you for Intimate moment , i didn't mean porn on a laptop !

Sheldon : first its animated , second it was Leonard's idea ..
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Sheldon: "What part of 'Wednesday night is Halo night' in the boyfriend/girldfriend agreement is not clear to you?"
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Sheldon: "Your aunt is turning 93. If her age is any indicator of her health, I'll attend her 94th birthday."



Amy: "Really, Sheldon? You won't attend my aunt's party? I'm forced to celebrate Leonard Nimoy's birthday with you!"

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Amy: Really? Asexual? How many excuses can you come up with?
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Sheldon: I don't understand your concern, our relationship contract clearly states that games night is every third weekend on odd months and every second weekend on even months. With February being the exception of course, due to it's abnormally short status.



Amy: Counterpoint, go f*** yourself.
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Time's up, let do this. LEEEEROY JENNNNKINS!!



Goddamnit Leroy.
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At least I got chicken.
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