Open Caption: The River

Good morning, everyone! I hope you enjoyed the long weekend, assuming you live in the U.S. and were lucky enough to have Presidents Day off yesterday. But, now that we're back, it's time to get back to business—because this is serious business. Here are your Open Caption winners from last Thursday's contest:


From Taccado:
Archer: "Looks like this 'shoot first, ask questions later' policy really doesn't seem to work as an interrogation technique."


From ToddMurray:
Malory: "Sterling, I hope you milked him dry..."
Sterling: "Phrasing."
Malory: "...before you blew his brains out..."
Sterling: "Phrasing, mother."
Malory: "...and got his essence all over my new Persian rug!"
Sterling: "PHRASING!!"


From chas031:
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Archer: "Safety off."
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Archer: "Safety on. Okay, now I got it."


Today's Image: The River

In tonight's episode of the search mission from Hell, the team finds one of Emmet's missing crew members, only to discover he's been cursed somethin' awful... and so must decide whether or not to leave him behind. In the still below, Lena (Eloise Mumford) sits with the poor soul (Scott Michael Foster), who isn't looking too hot. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!

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Eloise: "Hey Scott.... You were really good in 'Greek'. I had a huge crush on Cappy. Did you see my work in 'Lone Star'? Yeah, neither did anyone else. How did we end up on this show together? Crazy, huh? And we've both done 'Law & Order' shows, but who hasn't? Right?! How did you get on 'Californication'? Who's your agent? David Duchovny's hot. What was it like working with him? I hated your character on 'Parenthood'. Why'd you do 'Melissa & Joey'? That girl is SO annoying. You wanna hang out in my trailer later and watch 'Lone Star'? You're not very talkative. I like that about you!"



Scott: ***kill me now***
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Lena: My training as a dental hygienist is finally paying off.
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Lena (thinking): "Please, don't let this be like that Alien movie."
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Lena: "I know what will help-- more cleavage!"
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Lena: "I don't why this isn't working. It's almost like the oxygen is leaking out of the slit in his neck or something."
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Guy (thinking): "Mental Note: If I make it through this, change insurance companies!"
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First we're putting cameras in closets, now you want me to stick one in his mouth? Ugh, who signed me up for this?
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Curse of the "Redneck!!!"

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Should I look concerned or constipated? How about I just smelled rotten eggs?

Director: Go with your instincts.
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This "smell the fart" acting isn't paying off. Maybe I should adopt this guys, "blank stare" acting.
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Lena : i still don't understand when Jahel said " its [Untranslatable] ! " , Whats that supposed to mean?



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Lena: Maybe if we turned the oxygen on...
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Lena: Don't complain...I've had worse things in my mouth.
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Lena: Blow, blow, blow.....WOW 1.92 !! OK, you ARE over the legal limit. No driving!!
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Lena (thinking to herself) - "I used to be prom queen"
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Lena: Well, according to this thingamabob you either have the worst cavity in history or you've been shot in the neck.

crewman: Cavity, let's go with cavity!!
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Lena - What am I gonna have to do next breast feed him
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Lena: "Really? A keg stand lying down? Man, you are lazy!"
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Crewman: I can has cheezburger?

Lena: OMG I love lolcats! Seriously though, there's actually quite little food and when you die we will probably have to eat you, so....no, no cheeseburger.

You can have this leather strap though!

Crewman: I'll eat it, but I'm not going to like it.

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Lena: I miss my cat
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Something stinks
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