Open Caption: Tim Allen + Elvira on Last Man Standing

Halloween is in less than a week, and you know what that means: Open Caption, Now with More Costumes! But first, here the winners from yesterday's contest:

From skeeter291:
Dick Cavett: This is my guest? You mean you bumped Don Rickles for him?

From Taccado:
The finale of the first annual Who Can Go the Longest Without Peeing competition.

From Arch_Angel88:
Dick: "Here today we have the very talented Jonathan Ames, discussing his Oedipal complex."
Jonathan: "Ummm, I thought we were going to talk about my new book."
Dick: "We'll get to that."


Today's Image: Last Man Standing
Just when you thought you'd seen everything, here's this: Tim Allen, Hector Elizondo, and Elvira, Mistress of the Night. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!

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"This is the best episode of Movie Macabre since 1984."
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The mask on the wall is a perfect example of the side effects of watching Last Man Standing over time. Viewers may experience bleeding of the eyes and suicidal thoughts.
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Tim Allen: I'm Captain Allen and I'm leaving tomorrow to serve overseas! Nah I'm just joshin...I'll be staying in America to keep ruining your Tuesday nights.

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Hector: Wow, Ms. Peterson, that's the best Elvira costume I've ever seen! You even sound just like her.

Tim (whispering): He does know that you're actually Elvira, right?

Elvira/Cassandra Peterson (whispering): Shh! Don't spoil it.
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Elizondo (to Elvira): "You trick... My treat."
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Tim / aka "Mike Baxter": "Elvira, you really are out of this world... to infinity and beyond!"
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Skull hanging in the back: "Im not the creepiest looking guy in this room."
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Elizondo: You know, I once made a film called The Fat Black Pussycat.
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now that's some nice cleveage you have there...
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Elvira to dracula : What the hell ? It's Halloween, not "honor the troups" day...

Dracula to Elvira : Yeah don"t mention it. It's just that he's afraid of soldiers since his childhood so...
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"This job sucks, but at least we get to be dressed up."
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Dracula to Elvira: "I would strike a wooden stake in you any day.
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Elvira: Are you a count?

Dracula: I can count to two.
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Tim: You think THIS is bad?? They booked Jonathan Winters as Santa!!
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tim: "who farted?"

elvira; " it wasn't me"

elizondo:"it WAS.. her..."
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Elizondo: "Do you like the convertible? Vait till u see under the hood..."

Elvira: "This dental prosthesis adhesive is so strong"

TIm: "Come on you guys, i really have to go number 2"
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That woman has 3 breasts!!!!!!!! Wait nope sorry, that's just Hector's Head.
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Tim Allen: I'm dressed as a gay soldier, my costume's far scarier than yours!
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TIM : finally , my dream come true.Dracula and Amy Winehouse in my show!
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I vant to suck your...
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Whew. That dream was so realistic, I actually thought 15 years had passed. Wars, terror attacks, economic collapse... I can see now that it is clearly still 1996...
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ABC presents its newest reboot, The Munsters.
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Elvira: "It's fang-tastic to meet you, Mr. Elizondo. Hey, eyes up here, Grandpa!"
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Tim: "Elvira? More like my old buddy, Al Borland, wearing a dress and wig!"
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Hector Elizondo: "Who the heck booked me on THIS show? This is ridiculous. I need a new agent."
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