Open Caption: Touch

Though it may have been yesterday's caption, it's kind of appropriate that we're posting the winner today—brings a whole new meaning to the phrase, "Thirsty Thursday." Here are the winning captions from yesterday's contest:


From Taccado:

"That night, Alex drank Pete under the table. Literally."


From kickdoor:

Peet: My last show on NBC only made it one season.
Walton: Mine, too.
Peet: Huh.
Walton: Yeah...
Peet: We should probably get drunk while the booze is still free.


From Ewen83:

Pete: "Nothing shifts limescale like Californian Shiraz."



Today's Image: Touch

In tonight's episode, "1+1=3," Martin (Kiefer Sutherland) makes an honest attempt to understand his number-obsessed son, Jake, whose confused math equations lead them on a journey to a pawn shop that's just been robbed—and to a few of the lives that the robbery impacted. In the still below, Martin and Arthur (guest star Danny Glover) discuss young Jake's case. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!

Check out all of our recent winners on TV.com's Open Caption Pinterest Board.

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Glover: Tell me, does it smell like eggs?
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Kiefer: It is Casual Friday, but a rob. Really?

Glover: (whispers) Does it make me look fat?

Kiefer: Calm down. You are pretty F***ing thin.

Glover: Thin is my middle name. But I'm too old for this sh**.
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Kiefer: Tell me what I want to know or i'll rip apart all these articles about your success.

Glover: No! I am telling you what I know. Please, you've got to trust me.
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Kiefer: "I'm going through the stack of scripts my agent sent over. When FOX cancels us, I'll need a new gig."



Glover: "Take me with you!"
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I'm telling you, it worked for me, it'll work for you too! Now grab my hands and we'll jump into the tub!

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Glover: Man, you're getting my Martha Stewart magazines out of order!

Sutherland: Really? In THAT bathrobe?
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Danny Glover: I'm getting too old for this s***.
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Danny Glover : for the last time , i am not in community , thats Donald Glover !
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Glover : I was in the best 4 action movies ever .

Sutherland : first season of 24 got an avg of 8 million viewers.

Glover : i was 15 times as a character who works in military!

Sutherland : i killed more than 16 terrorists in one show !

Glover : i've been an actor and producer for more than 23 years.

Sutherland : i had more than 42 fighting scenes with a badass guys .

BOTH : hmmm....4 ..8..15..16...23...42......Shit , LOST wins!
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Arthur: Your son has spent $10,000 on cell phone calls in the last day.

Martin: DAMMIT!
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I told you I can poop standing up!
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Sutherland: The following takes place between 3:18 and 3:19 pm.
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Glover: I AM more famous than you, I was in Saw!
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I swear, I TOLD Riggs to cut the other wire!
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"I swear I was on all 4 lethal weapons!!!"

"Sure, but I was jack Bauer :)"
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Martin; um dude, could you put some pants on.



Arthur; The universe stole all my pants!
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Arthur: Would you like one of these cookies? They're homemade.

Martin: There's nothing in your hands.

Arthur: I REALLY am getting too old for this shit !!
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Arthur: I'd love to help you with your son but I'm-

Martin: Let me guess, you're too old for this shit.

Arthur: Yeah, did you son predict that I was going to say that?

Martin: No I figured that one out myself.
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Arthur : i miss Glee

Martin : i miss Fringe

*hug*
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Nice network cross-promotion!
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Martin: Based on my son's equations, we have 24 hours to prevent another 9/11!

Arthur: Man, I'm too old for this s***!
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Glover "I told you I don't have Winnie-the-Puuh!"
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Danny Glover: I told you already, Kiefer, Donald Glover is NOT my son.
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We can dream.
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Martin: These are all the various terrorist plots and subplots I foiled in just seven days.



Alex: I killed a Predator bitch! And had to deal with Gary Busey while doing it.



Martin: Okay you win.
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This totally should win. Nice one.
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Kiefer: So wait, if 1+1=3, how will i ever make 24 again??
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Glover to Keifer: Keifer, I give your new show 2 thumbs up.
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Keifer: Ughh...you're vinyl collection is so mainstream.

Glover: No one likes a hipster!

Keifer: I can't sigh loud enough.
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Glover: I need your help...

Keifer: With what?

Glover: ...to go to the bathroom

Keifer: Son of a B*tch...
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Let: a = b; multiply by a

Then: a*a = a*b; subtract b*b

a*a - b*b = a*b - b*b; factor

(a + b)(a - b) = b(a - b); divide by (a - b)

a + b = b; we're given that a = b, substitute

So: b + b = b; combine like terms

2b = b; divide by b

2 = 1; substitute

Thus: 1 + 1 = 2 + 1 = 3

1 + 1 = 3

What's this about a kid and a robbery?
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They'll no doubt tie 1+1=3 into their theory that the golden mean controls the whole universe. This is a new genre - math(s) fiction instead of science fiction.
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= Winning Caption!
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Nice! Love a good math equation. Who says you can't divide by zero. Suck it universe!
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Look you little hoodlum, I told you not to touch my expensive laserdisc collection. Now get out of here! And don't think of taking any of my umbrellas! Or my didgeridoo!
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Kiefer: I need your help.

Glover: Terrorists?

Kiefer: No filing. I just can't get the hang of this cross reference system.

Glover: Again? I'm too old for that ****
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Martin: I found your stash of porn. Impressive.

Arthur: It's the only thing a man my age can enjoy!
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