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Open Caption: Wilfred Fetches a Cake

The people have spoken! Actually, it was just one person. But that's enough to count for majority rules, right? RIGHT! So seeing as I won't be back from sweet, sweet vacation until August 6, you've all got exactly 12 days to submit your commentary for today's contest photo. That's a lot of days. If I don't come back to like a million Open Caption suggestions, I'll cry. Then again, if I do come back to that many I'll probably cry, anyway. But don't let that stop you! Here are the winners from yesterday's contest:


From DanielleS05:

Peter: "You've been served!"


From ToddMurray:

Peter: "I find you extremely unfunny, sir. I'm going to destroy you on this court like you've destroyed comedy."
David Cook: "I think you have me confused with DANE Cook."


From Noobs21:
Tim DeKay: "I thought this was a White Collar/Burn Notice crossover—they said I had a scene with Michael Weston."
Michael Weston: "I am Michael Weston."
Tim DeKay: "Don't lie to me, you look nothing like the guy on Burn Notice."
Michael Weston: "My REAL name is Michael Weston."



Today's Image: Wilfred

Because you're going to have some time to sit with it, I figured it'd be worth our while to choose an image based more on the actual caption worthiness than the fact that it's on TV tonight. So, I chose this still from Wilfred, which is from the episode that will air tomorrow night. In it, Wilfred brings Ryan a cake box. I'll let you decipher what's inside. Post your best caption ideas in the comments!



Check out all of our recent winners on TV.com's Open Caption Pinterest Board.

Comments (41)
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Ryan: "Wilfred, who's bone is that?"

Wilfred: "The mailman's. We played tag. He lost."
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Wilfred: Ryan, don't even try to look bloody surprised. We both know you saw the episode a few days ago.
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News today, UPS closed a merger with petco. Company image updated.
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Geez... not one thumb up? haha. maybe it's the fact that this link is no longer readily available without a search of C. Killian (hint!).
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Ryan: What does 'Gory hole' mean and why is it an empty box with a hole in the bottom.



Wilfred: Ah, hang on a second, mate... there's supposed to be an 'l' in the first word. All the same, just keep your focus on it for a few more seconds.

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Wilfred: Oy! You call it feces, I call it food to recycle! It's decorated with some of that corn you gave me, and I even put some pretty sparkles on it! Eat up!
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Ryan: Dude... Gwenyth Paltrow's head?



Wilfred: One of seven, mate.
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Wilfred: No mate, it's perfect! You see, we dogs made our own version of Silence of the Lambs. The poodle is holding a kid like you hostage in the burrow hole, and the other dog is demanding "It put the lotion on its tail, or it gets the water pail!". You'll love it, mate, trust me.
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'How did you get our universe in this small box?'



'Imagination and a whole load of copyright infringements'
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Ryan: Weren't you supposed to set fire to this ring my door bell and run away?
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Ryan: this isn't cake this is-

Wilfred: i know, this is better than cake. you can eat it, or have sex with it
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Ryan: It's an adult toy... shaped like a dog's ass. Thanks Wilfred.

Wilfred: I ordered the Scrappy-Doo model for you. Lube comes tomorrow.
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Ryan: "Understanding Australian Slang". Hmmm... I think I get you pretty well, but thanks.

Wilfred: Crickey! No ya don't!
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Ryan: Couldn't you have set it for just a few more seconds so I could run?

Wilfred: Your problems are over, Ryan! It's a great gift.
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Ryan: Oh, look! The new Spiderman movie on DVD. Thanks for the reminder, Wilfred!
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Ryan: I said BUNT cake, Wilfriend, not BUNG.

Wilfred: More for me then, I guess.
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Ryan: You may not see eye-to-eye with the director, Wilfred, but his head?? How are we going to get a season three?
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Ryan: Why is Bear's head in this box?

Wilfred: Duh, Ryan. Because his body's too big to fit. Geez.

Ryan: No, Wilfred. I meant, why did you do this to Bear?

Wilfred: Because he's a smart a$$ little pr!ck, that's why! I warned him that if he didn't stop talking back to me, I'd rip his f#cking head off and sh!t down his neck! ..... By the way, Bear clogged up your toilet and the basement is now flooded. Happy birthday Ryan!
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That's not a cake.... That's your penis...
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Ryan: Why did you bring me Bob Barker's head in a box?

Wilfred: It's my way of saying thanks for having me spayed or neutered?
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Ryan : What is that ?!

Wilfred : It's your Hobbit costume !
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Ryan: "Come on, whats in the box?!"
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Ryan: I throw you a stick to fetch and you bring me what?

Wilfried: It's my stick in a box... Kinda
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Ryan: why did you shit in the box?

Wilfred: because I ate the cake.
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Step 3: Make him open the box...
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"Actors do tend to get pigeonholed. People want to know who you are so they can put you in a box." Tom Hiddleston



Elijah: "Is that a metaphor for your career, Jason?"
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Ryan: "It's just brownies. I expected something nasty coming from you."

Wilfred: "They are the opposite of nasty, they are filled with pot! We can smoke them tonight."
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Wilfred: "I got them for bear. What do you think, Ryan?"

Ryan: "As long as I don't have to watch you two use them...I think he'll love these anal beads."
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Ryan: "A leash? I thought you hated leashes."

Wilfred: "That's not for me, Ryan. It's you who has been out of control."
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Ryan: "What the f...?"

Wilfred: "Keep your lipstick in its case, Ryan. This little toy here is the key to Jenna's heart."
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Wilfred: "I just ate all my dinner, Ryan, then I though you might be hungry, so I saved some for you. Enjoy it."
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Wilfred: "Admire the texture, Ryan. The perfect curves, the strong brown color, the pungent aroma. It's not every day we see such a magnificent work of art. And it's all yours."
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Wilfred: This is for you, Ryan. It's a dead dove.

*Ryan opens the box and is surprised*

Ryan: Well, I'm not sure what I expected.



A bit of a shout out... ;)
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Ryan: Uh, there's nothing in this box, Wilfred.

Wilfred: It's a lesson.

Ryan: What's the lesson?

Wilfred: That you're a selfish prick that thinks he deserves presents when it's not even his birthday.
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Ryan: Wow, DVDs. Thanks, Wilfred.

Wilfred: What the hell is a DVD? I'm giving you a bunch of Matt Damon pictures.
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Ryan: A dick. I suppose it's funny since my last name is Wood, but c'mon man.



Wilfrid: Those assholes Samberg and Timberlake stole the idea from me!
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Cool
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Ah, I'm fairly early on this one with only 3 comments before me... and I'm still beat out (twice) for poo jokes. I don't know if that says more about our humor or the show, hehe.
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Ryan : uuhh ! you brought me cake ! ( opens the box )



Wilfred : no its just my dick in a box ...
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Ryan: "You took a dump in a box?"

Wilfred: "My gift to you. I worked on it for hours. Perfect shape, smell and taste. It's my best work so far."
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Wiflred; I was going to light it on fire and put it at your doorstep. But I wanted to give it too you in person.



Ryan; Shit
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