Parks and Recreation, The Vampire Diaries, and Community

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What to watch on Thursday, May 12.

I may just be speaking for myself (I am definitely just speaking for myself), but tonight's TV schedule consists of only the Vampire Diaries finale and just a bunch of other junk. Just kidding, a lot of the other shows are good, but who cares, Damon's been bitten by a werewolf!

The Vampire Diaries
It's been a long season (the LONGEST season?), but it all comes down to tonight and whether or not the charismatic, best-paid star of The CW's best show will or won't die of a werewolf bite. What is going to happen to Damon, you guys?? I am VERY nervous.

9:30 & 10pm, NBC
Parks & Recreation
When Leslie and Ben take a close-quarters road trip to Indianapolis, it's all she can do to not try and make out with him (which, fair enough!). Meanwhile, Ron imparts his governmental views upon a child.

In tonight's season finale of America's favorite show about rogue spies who just need to RELAX more, Percy tries ONCE AGAIN to take over the CIA, and Nikita's life is ONCE AGAIN in danger. One day these people will realize that the real killer is the stress they bring on themselves, you know?

It's the second part of last week's awesome paintball rematch, which is also the Season 2 finale, so tune in to watch as the study group unites to destroy their invaders once and for all.

It's amazing that after eleven seasons, Las Vegas still has people left to be murdered! In tonight's season finale, Ray tracks serial killer Nate Haskell to the original house where his killing spree began.

SEASON 3 PREMIERE, 10pm, Discovery
Swords: Life on the Line
Probably the biggest TV trend of our current downward-trending economy is the absolute glut of reality shows concerning terrible blue collar jobs. Tonight, Swords returns for a third season in which we'll watch a clumsy greenhorn crew get used to the deep sea fisherman lifestyle, plus Linda and Scotty renew their friendly rivalry. But seriously, is Damon really gonna DIE?? #savedamon


American Idol, 8 p.m., Fox
The Big Bang Theory, 8 p.m., CBS
Wipeout, 8 p.m., ABC
Rules of Engagement, 8:30 p.m., CBS
Bones, 9 p.m., Fox
Grey's Anatomy, 9 p.m., ABC
Police Women of Broward County, 9 p.m., TLC
River Monsters, 9 p.m., Discovery
Swamp People, 9 p.m., History Channel
The Office, 9 p.m., NBC
Mounted in Alaska, 10 & 10:30 p.m., History Channel
Pawn Queens, 10 & 10:30 p.m., TLC
Private Practice, 10 p.m., ABC
Randy Jackson Presents: America's Best Dance Crew, 10 p.m., MTV
Real Housewives of New York City, 10 p.m., Bravo
The Mentalist, 10 p.m., CBS
True Crime with Aphrodite Jones, 10 p.m., ID
Secret Diary of a Call Girl, 10:30 p.m., Showtime
Outsourced, SEASON 1 FINALE, 10:30 p.m., NBC
Gigolos, 11 p.m., Showtime
Son of a Gun, 11 p.m., MTV


Raphael Saadiq on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 12:00 a.m., ABC
Maya Rudolph & Nick Offerman on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:35 a.m., NBC
Kristen Wiig on Daily Show with Jon Stewart, 11 p.m., Comedy Central
Judd Apatow on Chelsea Lately, 11 p.m., E!
Jen Kirkman on Conan, 11:00 p.m., TBS
Jim Parsons on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35 p.m., CBS
Norm Macdonald on Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35 p.m., NBC
Mary Lynn Rajskub on Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37 a.m., CBS

What are you watching tonight?

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