Now that remakes, adaptations, reboots, sequels, prequels, prebootquels, and reimaginings have become the rule rather than the exception, we're all getting way savvier about what pre-existing properties we're willing to put up with. Until recently only a tiny percentage of viewers (i.e., snobs like me) would reject remakes on principle, but lately larger and larger swathes of audience have finally started turning their backs on unnecessary remakes or adaptations. Take last week's box office disaster Battleship: Though it admittedly shouldn't have opened so soon after The Avengers, its primary failing was its title. When audiences learned it was a $200 million adaptation of a BOARD GAME, they rejected it sight unseen for being a particularly cynical cash grab. While it's probably a GOOD thing that remakes and adaptations aren't as sure a bet as they used to be (bring on the originality!), there's one problem with our newfound savvy: What if a remake is actually pretty good?
Remaking Teen Wolf was a terrible idea and we all knew it. Think back to last summer: Had you ever seen so much internet eye-rolling over a TV show before? For one thing, did the intended viewership of this series (I'm guessing people aged 12-25) have ANY recollection AT ALL of the original Michael J. Fox movie? And for those that DID remember and enjoy the original, why on earth would they want it given a moody, Twilight-esque makeover? At least in a business sense, I think we were all pretty baffled. HOWEVER. Something odd has been happening to me lately, and perhaps you can relate. As my fellow moviegoers and TV viewers have become more and more resistant to these remakes of pre-existing properties, I've become more and more relaxed about it. Call it jadedness, call it old-age (I'm in my late-70s), but lately I just don't care why a show or movie came into existence. I just don't. If it's fun, I'll like it. (Is this the right place to mention I actually really enjoyed Battleship? No? Nevermind then!) So while a lot of people spent last summer lamenting how lame MTV was for exhuming this old beast, I sorrrrta fell in love with it! Guys, Teen Wolf is GOOD. Sure, it's not Breaking Bad good. It's FUN good. It's surprisingly well-written good. It's funny good. It's scary good. It's just good, basically.
In honor of Teen Wolf's upcoming second season (starting June 3rd!) and my subsequent weekly photo recaps, I figured we should go back and look at its surprisingly great first season, starting with the first six episodes. Just FYI, this is more of an introduction than a proper photo recap, so it's caption-lite. I kinda like to get to know a show better before I start snarkin' on it, you know? And in case you're wondering, I definitely recommend watching the actual episodes. My coverage generally skips over the genuinely funny moments since I think it's really uncool to interfere with other peoples' jokes. (That's why I don't really quote Damon very often in my TVD recaps). Plus Teen Wolf is genuinely scary and beautifully filmed. So yeah, you're missing out if you're only going by THIS mess below.
Okay let's talk about Teen Wolf!
Season 1, Episode 1: "Wolf Moon"
Two things were obvious right off the bat with this show: It's WAY scarier than Twilight and it has some of the best camera work on TV. A lot of the credit for that goes to famous B-movie director Russell Mulcahy (Highlander, Ricochet, Razorback) and the show just has this heightened, goth horror vibe that's pretty irresistible.
Anyway! We began with footage of action in the woods: Police with flashlights and bloodhounds and no real sense of what's going on. Meanwhile at an isolated house that reminded me of Dawson's house from Dawson's Creek, we met a skinny, asthmatic teen doing tons of things that could be construed as metaphor for masturbation. "Lacing his lacrosse stick." "Doing chin-ups." "Washing his face."
Meet Scott McCall! The thing you should know about Scott (and Tyler Posey) is he seems REALLY teenage. He looks genuinely high school aged, but more than that, he speaks and reacts like kiiiiind of a dummy. He's a decent kid with good intentions, but he's not super articulate and tends to do a high-voiced shout whenever he gets frustrated. I honestly don't know how much of this performance is intentional or not, but it seriously WORKS. So far, at least the first part of this show's title is ACCURATE.
The best part about Scott, though, is his best friend. Stiles (Dylan O'Brien) is just an awesome character. Afflicted with A.D.D. and a sense of adventure, Stiles is the kind of kid who sneaks into your bedroom through a second-floor window and also drags you out into the woods in the middle of the night to investigate a possible dead body situation.
Seriously, you gotta love characters that go looking for danger. It's so teen detective agency I couldn't stand it. I was charmed right away.
Anyway, then things took a turn for the horrifying when Stiles got caught by his Sheriff father (Melrose Place's Linden Ashby!) and dragged off, leaving Scott and his asthma inhaler all alone in the woods. Then this happened:
A bunch of CGI deer nearly trampled him! (This was actually a very cool moment, and again, you should see the episode.) And then Scott lost his CGI inhaler too!
Oh and then he found the dead body!
Oh and then he got attacked by THIS thing:
All in all, not a good night for Scott McCall. Unless you consider terrifying inciting incidents to be good, in which case it was a GREAT night for Scott McCall.
The next day at Beacon Hill High School (which is definitely NOT Mystic Falls High School), it was just another typical day in which English teachers give lectures on HIGHLY PERTINENT metaphorical subject matter.
And that's when a new girl showed up in class.
Meet Allison Argent. She has insane eyelashes and SECRETS. She and Scott had a cool meet-cute though, in that he was sitting in class experiencing supersonic werewolf hearing (because did I mention that he'd been bitten by a werewolf?) and could hear her having a phone conversation outside in which case she was complaining about not having a pen. And then when she entered the classroom and took the seat behind him, he offered her a pen. Okay that sounds dumb to type out, but it was charming!
While we're talking about characters, let's do it roll-call style. For instance, this is Jackson, the big man on campus. Why? Because this school doesn't have a football team, only lacrosse. THAT'S how not-Californian this allegedly California school is. Anyway, Colton Hayes is pretty great in this role. Jackson has this intensely articulate news anchor thing going on, and he's written to be way wittier and more perceptive than jock a-holes normally are. This character is pretty typical of Teen Wolf in that this show is comfortable using all the old teen drama tropes (including ACTUAL elements from a specific property) but then adds slight twists and improvements to them.
Like, take Lydia, Jackson's girlfriend and female counterpart. She's supposed to be the mean girl of the school except her twist is that she's secretly a genius. Like, book-smarts wise. Also, Holland Roden plays her like she's a forty-something pill-popping cougar in the body of a teenager.
Haha this guy. Okay so this is Derek Hale, a mysterious stranger who just happened to return to town on the SAME DAY as Scott's werewolf attack. If that sounds like it's too coincidental then good, that's what this show wants you to think. Now, Derek is a great character for a number of reasons. For one thing, look at his face. THAT is a wolfman. For another, just wait until you see where he lives
This guy is Coach Finstock, the lacrosse coach and also he teaches something, I'm not sure what. But I mostly bring him up because a lot of the season is based around the mystery of just WHO the evil werewolf could be, and the Coach here was definitely a candidate.
I think my favorite supporting character is definitely this lady, Allison's mom Mrs. Argent. She doesn't have a ton of lines, but the camera loves to cut to her for reaction shots and MAN is she good at them. She's just so intense and mysterious looking all the time, I was half-expecting this show to reveal her as some kind of sorceress. That never happens in Season 1, at least, but I've got my fingers crossed for Season 2. I can't take my eyes off her!
Anyway, back to the story: After Scott got bit, it had tons of effects on his life. The #1 most useful effect, of course, was his suddenly amazing lacrosse skills!
Suddenly he was coach's favorite player, Jackson's biggest enemy, and Allison's date to a party that weekend... DURING THE FULL MOON!
The downside was he was already having weird "dreams" in which he was psychically connected to the werewolf that bit him and then waking up in the woods for real because those weren't dreams!! Also, the show keeps doing cool shots like this:
Very Michel Gondry of them!
Nothing like a chillin' in a towel with your mom! Scott's mom seems like a good lady: A divorced nurse who's pretty mellow and works so much she's basically not there. The perfect parent in a teen drama, basically!
Anyway, the party didn't go well, as Scott's werewolf abilities began to manifest in a way that made it seem like he'd had too much to drink. So he ditched Allison, went home and took ANOTHER shower, and then wolfed out for real.
Then, while he was scampering around in the woods, he had a run-in with a trio of WEREWOLF HUNTERS!
If you watched this show before The Secret Circle, then you were like, "Hey, it's the werewolf hunter from Teen Wolf!" Or if you watched The Secret Circle first, then right now you're probably like, "Hey, it's the witch hunter from The Secret Circle!" I don't know which reaction you're having right now, but let's just agree on something: J.R. Bourne has the best resumé.
Anyway, so then this guy shot Werewolf Scott through the arm with an arrow, but Derek Hale showed up and saved him and they both escaped the hunters. That's just werewolf teamwork! So while Scott remained frightened by this much older werewolf dude, it was clear they had a common enemy. (And yeah, it should be noted that Derek never confirmed nor denied that he had been the werewolf that bit Scott. Just FYI).
Anyway, at school the next day Scott apologized to Allison for ditching her at the party and she was cool with it. The best part was that he didn't even pretend to have an excuse, he was just like, "Sorry. Please don't ask questions." And she didn't! But then, I think it's obvious what was about to happen:
Whoops! Scott went and fell in love with the daughter of a werewolf hunter! But did Mr. Argent recognize Scott in human form? And how much was Allison aware of her dad's occupation?
If we're being honest here, the first episode suffered a bit from pilot-itis. It set up a lot, introduced tons of characters, and had a fairly solid story. However, it still felt pretty by-the-numbers, so keep in mind if you're going to watch the show (which you should! It's on Netflix Instant!) it doesn't really get good until this next one...
Season 1, Episode 2: "Second Chance at First Line"
THIS episode is SO good. Right off the bat, this episode established two huge selling points of Teen Wolf: (1) Locker room scenes, and (2) a looser, weirder tone. Stiles especially gets a lot funnier in this episode and has more to do. I'm gonna be raving about Dylan O'Brien's performance a lot in these photo recaps, but his skills are hard to render in photo recap form. With all due respect to the writers, O'Brien's tics and unexpected reactions are so good I can't help but assume he's improvising a decent amount of it. But I also just like his and Scott's friendship. Stiles pretty much knew about Scott's lycanthropy before Scott did, so it's fun to see him totally embrace and support Scott's new condition.
Oh, this was a legitimately great scare: While they were web-chatting about werewolfism, Stiles spotted something behind Scott but his computer FROZE before he could warn him. I don't know, I just thought that was a really clever way to make technology scary (technology is usually not scary).
Anyway, it was Derek again. Haha that guy. He <3s stalking teenage boys so much!
So the main idea of this episode was that Scott couldn't control his werewolf urges, either on the field or around the girl he liked. So even though he scored a starting position on the team, he was considering sitting out the big game out of fear that he'd wolf out and kill everybody. In another great scene, Lydia caught wind of his plan and harassed him into playing so that her boyfriend's winning record would remain untarnished. Oh, and she was doing a complicated algebra problem on the chalkboard the whole time.
See? Her smart!
So anyway, HAHA Derek's house!
Like, WHAT? There is not even a roof on that thing! Where does he keep his dresser full of one size too small henleys??
While there, Scott noticed a shallow grave in the side yard, so that night he and Stiles returned to DIG IT UP OBVIOUSLY.
What they found was not cute.
Poor doggie! But wait, things were about to get weird. Noticing a freshly planted, blooming Wolfsbane plant, Stiles plucked it out of the ground and pulled up the spiral of rope attached to it.
At which point the wolf's head transformed into THIS:
Haha, that actress was like, "Is it Friday yet?" Hang in there, girl! This shot will look pretty great on her reel.
Anyway, the boys used this discovery to get Derek thrown in jail (because they still believed him to be the main werewolf still) and they continued on to their big game against... You guessed it:
MYSTIC FALLS HIGH! Oh, Teen Wolf. It's too bad you'd decided to go with maroon as YOUR school colors too, otherwise this might've actually worked. Speaking of worked, Scott definitely did end up wolfing out on the field.
—And scored the game winning shot! But just as the crowd rushed the field to congratulate him, he woofed it out of there and went to go hide in the darkened (?) locker room.
Allison followed him in there, and for a brief moment it looked like he was going to MURDER her. He'd done something similar to Stiles earlier in the episode, so it was clear he had some kind of split personality thing going on. Anyway, spoiler: He did not murder his love interest. Instead he returned to human form before she saw him and they kissed weirdly:
BUT! Out on the field a highly jealous Jackson discovered Scott's claw-torn glove.
And a certain stalker of teens discovered Jackson discovering the glove!
Ugh, my recap skills aren't good at conveying how good this episode was. It was good though! And take note it's only the second episode but there's already a lot of mythology development and other characters are getting in on the action too. Teen Wolf ain't spinnin' no wheels, you guys.
Season 1, Episode 3: "Pack Mentality"
One thing that nobody can deny is how good this show is with its cold open horror scares.
Seriously, this is NO Twilight. After Scott and Allison snuck onto a school bus for an impromptu makeout session, he changed into a werewolf, beat her up a ton, threw a seat at her, and then dragged her back onto the bus for a real bad time. BUT! It was just a dream sequence!
BUT! The next day at school, everybody found this:
Yikes! Then there was a pretty compelling moment where Scott nearly had a mental breakdown over the fact that he MAY HAVE killed his girlfriend. Then she showed up and he nearly started crying he was so happy to see her. It was really sweet actually!
Anyway, the blood was from an "animal attack" on the bus driver, who'd been found bleeding in the woods. This was a pretty great jump scare:
So now that Scott was a bonafide lacrosse hero, he and Stiles got to sit at the cool kids' table. Another cool thing about this show? There's a no-big-deal gay character who's not only a star athlete, he's a well-liked, nice guy. Imagine that! And what's even better is that Stiles is hilariously obsessed with him and whether or not he finds Stiles attractive. It's a great joke and makes Stiles that much funnier, but more importantly proves that a supernatural teen drama can be both VERY GAY (because, come on) and also include actual gay characters like it's no big deal. Danny is actually one of the less gay things about this show, which is awesome.
Another new character and possible evil werewolf? Scott's boss at the veterinary clinic! This guy loves to look suspicious in close-ups and also give tons of exposition about animal attacks. But again, that's pretty clever because being knowledgeable DOES also make him more suspicious, right?
So, it bugged Scott that he didn't know whether he'd attacked that bus driver or not and he finally turned to Derek for some mentorship. On Derek's advice, Scott returned to the bloody schoolbus and jogged his memory: As it turned out, he HADN'T been the one to go on the rampage. But who had?? (Spoiler: The evil werewolf had.)
For her part, Allison was now besties with Lydia and we learned that Allison didn't always listen to her dad. For instance, when Mr. Argent forbade her from going bowling with Lydia and Scott, Allison just put on her beanie and did a flip off the roof.
Teens! So yeah, it was more than implied that Allison MIGHT take after her father in some respects.
This bowling scene was pretty cute. It basically established that ALL FOUR OF THEM are expert bowlers. Lydia was trying to hide her skills from Jackson (much like she does her intellect) and Scott used his new werewolf abilities (and the mental thought of Allison nude) to make his strikes.
There was also a really funny scene where Derek was confronted by Mr. Argent at the gas station and Mr. Argent threatened him by WASHING HIS WINDSHIELD. What a weirdo! Anyway, at some point Scott learned that the bus driver died and believed that Derek had finished him off at the hospital. When confronted, both Derek and Scott wolfed out and threw each other around Derek's decrepit home.
At this point we knew Derek couldn't be the evil werewolf since he didn't turn into an unrecognizable beast-goon with glowing red eyes. But then he confirmed as much when he told Scott that he HADN'T bitten him. An "alpha" did. Then we got a cool Evil Dead-style camera whip-around that revealed the alpha was just outside the house, chillin' in the shadows. The plot thickens!
Season 1, Episode 4: "Magic Bullet"
Again with the clever cold opens: This episode began with a pretty woman driving late at night, typical horror movie set-up, in other words. A couple things: (1) This actress was the female host on Wipeout! Also (2) she openly chuckled when a news report cited "recent animal attacks". And (3) LOOK OUTSIDE YOUR WINDOW!
And then the reversal: Once the alpha werewolf attacked her car, she got out and HANDLED it.
The alpha ended up getting away, but a nearby looky-loo named Derek Hale got a bullet to the arm. Meanwhile, one of the show's best characters had arrived! Meet Aunt Kate, Mr. Argent's troublemaking little sister.
The next day at school Derek stumbled across campus clearly dying from his wound. At some point Jackson sassed him and Derek poked his claws into Jackson's neck. Uncool!
Later at Allison's Scott discovered that his girlfriend had unusual hobbies. Uh-oh. Clearly werewolf hunting ran in the family.
As for the dinner itself, it was a pretty awkward good time. The twist was that even though Aunt Kate was clearly a maniac, she was actually really cool to Scott and way nicer than her brother was. But Mr. Argent DID give an incredible monologue about rabies that concluded with the line "Something that out of control is better off dead." Just good dinner conversation, basically.
Anyway, the whole time, Stiles was looking after Derek, who was still super dying from that wound and they needed a second bullet exactly like the one Aunt Kate used to shoot him. So it meant suddenly Scott was creeping into the guest room going through her things. In a genuinely tense scene, just as he was about to leave, she stopped him and called him out for going through her things. Just when it looked like the S was about to hit the F, Allison admitted that SHE had gone through Kate's things looking for a condom.
Which was hilariously awkward seeing as her dad was standing right there. But the kicker was that Scott walked out relieved to not have been found out. And then he suddenly smiled all big re: the condom. Just a really good teenage moment.
So back at the vet's clinic where Stiles and Derek were having hilariously aggressive banter, Derek decided he'd need to take drastic measures to prevent his own death:
Yuck! Stiles did not really want to cut off a man's arm though. Fortunately Scott arrived with a second bullet, and Derek lit it on fire or whatever and rubbed the ashes into his arm.
It looked like it stank! Also it looked painful, sure, but imagine the smell! Anyway, it worked.
Then Derek felt compelled to inform Scott about just what they were dealing with here. Apparently the hunters had burned down his house (the one he still lives in) and murdered his entire family in the process, even ones that weren't werewolves. This burny-faced guy was his uncle, who now sat in a coma in a local facility. Also, that dead half-girl from the previous episodes? That was Derek's SISTER. Don't ask me why she looked like a full-on dog. Maybe she was an alpha too? It wasn't yet clear! But he definitely felt that she'd been murdered by the Argents in order to lure him back to town.
And just when he'd finished telling his story about how his house was burned down, we saw Kate do this:
UH-OH. She'd done it! The interesting thing to note was she and her brother definitely seemed to disagree about how to hunt werewolves. He'd allude to some kind of honor code and she'd get an evil glint in her eye. I already barely know anything about these people but they already make more sense than the witch hunters from The Secret Circle.
Anyway, another great episode. It deftly blended an awkward meet-the-parents scenario while deepening the mythology of werewolf society and also the werewolf hunters. And Jill Wagner is great! Who know there'd be something of redeeming value to come out of Wipeout?
Season 1, Episode 5: "The Tell"
This cold open might be my favorite: Mostly because of how unexpected it was to see these characters front-and-center in a supernatural scare scene. After an argument about whether to rent Hoosiers or The Notebook, Jackson left Lydia in the car (to take self-pics on her phone) while he went inside a mysteriously empty Blockbuster.
It wasn't long before he'd stumbled upon a dead employee and found himself being stalked by a shadowy abomination.
The alpha werewolf inspected his scratch, left him alone, and then burst through the front windows while Lydia was watching!
Honestly, usually on these shows they stretch out how long characters remain in the dark, so it was awesome to see the other teens get confirmation that something is UP.
Anyway, Lydia and Jackson did not take the experience well. Well, at least Jackson from the neck up didn't take it well:
(Dreamy sigh.) Moving on! He'd been having paranoid visions of the alpha werewolf and finally got cornered by Derek, who wanted to know what he'd seen. As we'd learned Derek was just as interested in tracking down the alpha as anybody else, and now it seemed like Jackson was somehow linked to them both.
Oh, so GUESS WHO plays Lydia's mom??
Mrs. Lockwood! Anyway, that was a thrill to discover. So after worrying that his crush hadn't been to school yet, Stiles paid Lydia a visit. Unfortunately she was super zonked on pills.
She DID have a momentary moment of lucidity where she remembered the awful beast from the night before. And it also seemed like she was flirting with Stiles... Until she called him Jackson and his heart broke right before our eyes.
Anyway, this episode was really on a roll:
Haha, just working out in a decrepit, empty, filthy house. Honestly, couldn't Derek have just rented a studio somewhere? Anyway, his extremely important workout montage was interrupted when a hussy with an industrial strength taser came calling.
This scene was great because it showed what a BAMF Kate is (she kicked his wolf butt!), but also we learned that she HADN'T killed Derek's sister, so his animosity had been sorta misguided. Also, she did this awesome thing where she lamented that he didn't know who the alpha was, turned around casually, then WHIPPED AROUND spraying a sub-machine gun at him! Kate is kind of the best.
I loved this scene where Stiles' sheriff dad showed security camera photos to the vet and they both couldn't quite tell what they were looking at. I mean come on, guys! That is a werewolf.
Haha oh and GUESS WHO plays Jackson's dad?
MR. LOCKWOOD! Haha this show. I mean, I know there are only what, like 11 actors in Atlanta? But come on, you took BOTH parents of a werewolf from a popular supernatural drama and cast them in YOUR show about werewolves? Good idea, or GREAT idea? Still though, this was from a great sequence in which all the teens' parents attended parent-teacher conferences and we learned a ton more about their kids' inner lives. For example, Jackson's adopted and has had a chillingly pathological need for overachievement since he was born. And while Lydia's parents talked about her, they showed her looking into the mirror all mentally troubled and haggard, then making herself over into a hot babe. Just good TV, seriously.
AND THEN, after Scott and Allison returned from their day of playing hooky in the woods (which, oh yeah, that was the main plot of this episode but it was kind of the least interesting subplot), a commotion broke out in the school parking lot when a mysterious beast was chasing people.
Mr. Argent calmly walked to his car and got out THIS gun. Then he handled it.
Hilariously enough, it WAS a mountain lion. Characters had been blaming all the recent deaths on a mountain lion, so it was actually pretty funny when this out of left-field coincidence occurred. What a weird show this is!
Season 1, Episode 6: "Heart Monitor"
Episode 6 began with Scott getting stalked through an empty parking garage, but since it was just Derek messing with him, it wasn't quite as fun.
Anyway, Stiles wasn't speaking to Scott, mostly because Scott hadn't returned his calls the previous day and also Stiles' dad got hit by a car during the mountain lion incident and it was somehow Scott's fault? Not sure. But I still liked this real-seeming spat between friends and how Stiles couldn't help himself but get back involved in Scott's problem. He's both a busy-body AND a good friend like that.
The main idea in this episode was that Scott would wolf out ANYTIME his heart reached a certain level, whether in a scary situation, on the field, or even just making out with Allison. So Stiles devised a way to help him control his heart rate, including an actual cell phone app that would tell Stiles whenever Scott's pulse went up. It was honestly pretty clever, and we got to see a fun sequence where Stiles fired lacrosse balls at a bound Scott over and over.
Meanwhile Jackson was still having shirtless locker room freakouts, including this fairly awesome hallucination that I've never seen happen in a werewolf saga before:
Yep, just the old werewolf-claw-coming-out-of-the-mouth scene!
Oh, here was another cool Gondry moment:
Scott was trying to avoid Allison (on the advice of Derek), and meanwhile she was learning tons more about her own family, verifying that she actually didn't know the extent to which Kate and her dad had weird hobbies. But apparently her family line had been fighting werewolves ever since the first recorded incident of a werewolf attack in long-ago France. Pretty cool backstory, actually! Rather than being all-purpose villains, the Argents actually had a legit point of view on things, and it was clear Allison seemed to be taking pride in her family. Uh-oh!
At one point Scott was getting berated by his coach in the classroom and just when it seemed like he was going to wolf out then and there, his heart rate mysteriously dropped again and it was revealed that Allison had taken his hand under the desk. Man, that's just good stuff right there. So rather than spend his time avoiding Allison, Scott realized that she had a calming effect on him. Specifically, he was IN LOVE with her. Which, you know, teens don't know what that means, right? But I appreciated that his definition of "in love" meant that she actually made him feel relaxed, which is a surprisingly decent notion of love.
Meanwhile Derek came to believe that the veterinarian was the alpha. To test his theory, he bound up the dude and brought him to the high school where Scott could "summon" the alpha over the loudspeaker. I guess they were just curious to see what the vet would do?
There was a funny joke here where, during his first attempt, a super pathetic mewling was heard echoing across the campus. The second attempt was a lot more ferocious, however, and before they knew it the vet had gone missing and Derek was being STABBED IN THE TORSO BY THE ALPHA!
Now that's just a good cliffhanger right there! Derek being ostensibly murdered! The kids running into the high school to hide! The vet's missing! Good times all around.
So the most remarkable thing about this show was all the ground it covered in just six episodes. It really lends a lot of credence to the cable model of 12-episode seasons. Network television really needs to look into it! There are still six episodes left of this season, which includes possibly my favorite one (the next episode). But we'll get to those next week!
... Who's your favorite character so far?
... Do you live in a burnt-down house?
... How many half-corpses have you discovered in the woods?
... Do you ever just chill with your mom while dressed in a towel?