White Collar fans rejoice! USA's most entertaining thievery procedural returned last night and we finally learned what happened when Neal's old treasure-hunter pal/nemesis Keller kidnapped Peter's wife Elizabeth as retribution for Neal's theft of a boatload of Nazi U-Boat treasure. (Whew!) It was an awkward situation, as it placed Peter directly in the middle of a longtime feud between seasoned cons, but it also exposed Neal's betrayal of his FBI partner. Fortunately the two didn't dwell too much on this aspect, as they immediately put into motion a scheme (involving Mozzie and Keller himself) to steal back the U-Boat treasure in the hopes of freeing Elizabeth (who it turned out didn't really need help, as she's apparently a lady MacGyver and mostly escaped on her own).
After pulling off the heist (in plain view of dozens of cops), Neal ended up going mano-a-mano with Keller using ancient weaponry, and Keller was eventually brought down by a bullet to the leg fired by a bleeding and bruised Neal (who'd been bashed over the head by a priceless Raphael painting). The episode ended with Neal and Peter in an unsteady truce and Neal deciding that he'd testify against Keller for all the crimes they'd committed together (which would've thrown Neal in prison for a while). Fortunately Keller decided to take the rap all on his own in order to score points with the Russian mafia. Obviously. So that bullet was dodged, but then Neal was presented with a new shocker: He was up for a probation hearing in three months, which could end his house arrest/probation entirely. Oh no, what will happen? Just kidding, Neal's not going anywhere.
Anyway, after that intense nail-biter of an episode, I'm sure you all have one question: "How did Neal LOOK?" So, presented here in chronological order, are Matt Bomer's finest moments:
And there you have it! Please note that in many of these scenes Neal was under A LOT of stress.
... Do you wear a tailored suit beneath your welding gear?
... When was the last time you sent a message via carrier pigeon?
... Were you disturbed when Matt Bomer's face was hit with a priceless Raphael painting? (Forget the painting.)
... How long can Peter possibly stay mad at Neal? I mean, just look at him!