Day 2 of our almost week-long look at the season's new opening sequences brings us to Mondays, which might be the weakest night for pretty graphics and video showing us the title of a TV show. Can't Mondays catch a break? First Garfield, now bad TV openings? Ugh! Let's get 'em over with, then meet back here tomorrow to discuss Tuesday's offerings.
2 Broke Girls
Well the show got one thing right: This is one broke-ass opening sequence! You can almost hear the producers saying, "Let's get this out of the way and get back to Kat Dennings saying snarky things while her boobs struggle to escape from her tight tops." So they got a few shots of the Brooklyn Bridge, re-purposed some hipster song from a car commercial, threw an Instagram filter on the whole thing to make it look like it was shot by a plastic camera sold at Urban Outfitters, and figured the 18-49-year-olds would flock! This is a lazier effort than 2 Broke Girls' racist Han Lee jokes, and in no way tells us anything about the show. If I'd never seen it before, I'd think it was about bridges. Grade: D
Hart of Dixie
Hart of Dixie producer: "It's a show about a woman in high heels who moves from New York City to the rural South. Can you reflect that in the opening title?" Graphic designer who takes things way too literally: "Okay." And why does a plane have to crash in the Sun? Grade: C
The Lying Game
What the hell? Is this an opening for a TV show or an ad for a sale in the Juniors section at Bloomingdale's? That said, this actually works for the ABC Family show, because 14-year-old girls are only interested in things that look cool. And what's cooler than lounging around in a pool wearing big sunglasses? The Lying Game and teen girls, that's what. Grade: C+
The Playboy Club
Before you ask, the video is backwards to sneak it around copyright violations, but you get the message, and the message is this: This show features chicks in embarrassing costumes. It's basically Saturday Night Live's opening with a lot more cleavage. Can't you just hear Don Pardo saying "It's The Playboy Club! Starring Eddie Cibrian! Amber Heard!" Predicting a show's quality based on its opening titles (see: Homeland) shouldn't be possible, but one look at this and you know you're in for an hour of mediocrity. Just because the show is set in the 1960s doesn't mean the credit sequence has to feel decades old. Grade: F
Terra Nova
Guess which show spent its entire budget on piss-poor CGI for pterosaurs and dino-fish!? Terra Nova was supposed to be an epic show, and an epic show deserves (and needs) an epic opening. Instead, we got the most expensive animated .gif ever made—which, in retrospect means it at least pairs well with the show. Just like the series, it's a wasted opportunity. I would have rather seen an acoustic performance from Josh Shannon. Grade: D
Two and a Half Men
Technically not entirely new, but CBS has added Ashton Kutcher to the mix, and he's doing his best lusty-eyed Charlie Sheen impression... which makes me want to button my shirt all the way up because he's eating me alive with his eyes. I feel violated. Watch this video and just stare at Ashton's face, I dare you. He's wearing a smile that says, "No one can hear you scream, so go ahead. It only makes you more attractive." Jon Cryer is the only thing that's okay about this, and that's stretching it. Grade: C-
Which new Monday-night credit sequences do you like best?
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i couldnt disagree more with the Tera nova D .
Who says that the epic show should have an epic opening and by what youre thing youre right>? The most epic show made so far - LOST didnt have one and that didnt make it less special. IN fact i DO like when they are not epic coz i skip them if they are.
Lets say Game of Thrones has one epic opening and its great one but i dont need that on each series
Really hate the Two and a half men intro now.... but hey that goes along with my feelings for the show since Kutch entered so... all's well, ends well I guess.
the intro for 2 Broke Girls fits perfectly with this show...
I've already commented on all the other "days" show lists. And I can only draw one conclusion. There is some serious amnesia problem in the producers cricle, cause they all seem to forgot how to make good opening credits...
Wow, Ashton Kutcher sure is creepy...
personally all of them stink the only one that had a llittle something was Playboy Club and everyone knows that it RIP!
Everything about Terra Nova appears to be lame. The theme is no different. And yeah Ashton is enjoying himself a little too much during that sequence. Like a creepy uncle.
what about HIMYM? That opening is pretty cool! The song with pictures...perfect!
HIMYM is not a new show. It's been arround for years now.
omg you're right! Ashton is such a creepo
Two Broke Girls: You shouldn't include an overview of the city in the opening theme unless the show title includes the name of the city.
Two and a Half Men: Ok, Jake you can stop looking at the camera every 2 seconds. And what the hell is wrong with Ashton!? He looks like he's SERIOUSLY enjoying singing that song... And a lot of these are way better than the tuesday opening credits, and have worse ratings...
I wouldn't have given an F to the Play Club. Yes, it's not very original but this looks to me like it was graded by Crocker from "The Fairy OddParent" just desperately wanting to give an F to someone...
Sweet Mary, but Ashton Kutcher creeped me out in that clip! Seriously!
I've only seen Terra Nova's opening, and I'm glad the show saved us from more than a few seconds of CG. It's brief, and sometimes that's a good thing.
That 'Hart of Dixie' opening literally made me laugh out loud. I actually feel embarrassed for everyone involved with the show.
The "Two and a Half Men" opening had a dark side to it -- Ashton looks deranged as all get-out -- but I'm a fan of dark, so it's a winner for me!
yeah i like 2 broke girls totally tells you that it obviously take place in NY. I like the old Two and Half Men theme with Charlie Sheen I'm sorry but Ashton Kutcher has too much of a raspy voice.
Sadly the producers of House skipped the opening of House this year, at least for the first few episodes. :(
There isn't a good opening for any Monday shows.
I've never watched The Lying Game, so I sit here confused wondering why a C+ was given to a mirror girl floating on a pool toy... I would give it a lower grade just because it tells me nothing about the show.
Agreed. Like pretty much all the other opening sequences presented in this series of articles it's plain simple "crap". However the show is actually not that bad :D
the thing about The Lying Game that was bad is that it's clearly not real, those floats are too close together for them to still be "peaceful" lol
The one positive thing I can say about any and all of these are that they're short.
1) The Lying Game
2) 2 Broke Girls
3) Hart of Dixie
4) The Playboy Club (would be higher if Amber Heard was featured more)
5) Terra Nova
6) Two and a Half Men (I never liked it, but somehow, Kutcher made it worse)
The Lying Game got the editor's highest grade given.
I'm prone to agree. As others have stated, it matches the themes of the show.
Omg, I shouldn't have watched that new opening with Ashton Kutcher because now I'm afraid to turn around in case he's behind me...
Most of these are mediocre and deserve the grade given by Tim. But I disagree with the C+ given to The Lying Game. Sure, it's not brilliant, but it does fit the show. It reflects the plot of twins having it out with each other, the glamour of the life portrayed in the show, and the music is fitting.
From the new shows I only watch Terra Nova because I am a hopeless sci-fi & fantasy junkie... the intro is boring..
From older shows I like House and the simple intro of Castle, after the 1st act (very few shows do the intro after the 1st act...)
None of them are very good. But some are better than others.
1. The Lying Game (I like the song, and the opening is definitely appropriate for the show)
2. Hart of Dixie (Quick. Catchy. And it introduces you to Bluebell effectively)
3. The Playboy Club (I'm a guy, and it's slightly better than the three below it)
4. 2 Broke Girls (No words)
5. Terra Nova (Even Disney has better graphics)
6. Two and a Half Men (It was weird with Charlie Sheen. Now it's even weirder with Kutcher)
Old Shows:
1. House
2. Bored to Death
3. How I Met Your Mother
4. Hawaii 5-0
HIMYM's intro is pretty cool I think. It doesn't overdo it, it's not too long or short, doesn't oversell itself...it's just some music and a pictur of a group of friends. Perfect for the show really.
Oh damn! Same list again!! Hahaha!
It'll be positively creepy if we both have the same list tomorrow!
I dont watch any of these.. for mondays, castle's short but strong intro is the best..
I kind of like the opening for Hart of Dixie, it sets the right tone for the show. Don't get me wrong, the show isn't great neither is the intro, but somehow that fits.
Terra Novas opening isn't that bad eighter, its short, the music is fitting, and, if not anything else, this opening tells you that this show does not want to be "Lost". It tells you exactly what it is, an hour of prehistoric fun for the whole family.
How is Hart of Dixie the second best of the bunch? Every time I watch that show, I cringe and fast forward when the opening sequence comes up. I like the opening for 2 Broke Girls the best
Out of this bunch, the opening for 2 Broke Girls is my favorite. It's short, but catchy.
*The Playboy Club - It reminds me of SNL, too.
*The Lying Game - Their opeining makes me think of Burn Notice, more specifically Fiona. Both the girl lounging in the pool and Fiona wear those huge, insectoid sunglasses.
LOST was an epic show, didn't have much of an opening. Sometimes less is more. I like Terra Nova's. Don't need anything more than it has. The music displays something uplifting and giving you this hope that this "new world" is going to work out.... Besides that, can't argue much about the rest of the openings.
Only watch The lying game & Terra Nova (wish i didnt), thought the lying game opening wasn't too bad..
I only watch TerraNova out of all the new ones. Saw a couple of Hart of Dixie episodes which I liked, but didn't continue with.
1. The Lying Game ( I thought it conveyed the message of the show, one twin will be betrayed by the other. Also, the tune is catchy)
2. Hart of Dixie (Rachel Bilson is adorable and the tune is simple, but effective)
3. The Playboy Club
4. 2 Broke Girls
5. Terra Nova (Mediocre show and intro. Wasted opportunity indeed)
6. Two & a Half Men (Creepiest intro ever for a comedy show)
Other shows that I watch on mondays :
Hawaii 5-0, Castle and How I Met Your Mother all have great intros.
Okay. This is getting weird.
You can say that again.
I love Hawaii Five-0's theme song! Castle's intro is great, too, although I wish the newer seasons hadn't chopped the intro down so much.
Love Castle's intro. They don't do the lengthy opening now. I miss it.
if you changed the opening song of Hart of Dixie to something sexy , it will indicated that the series is about a slut moves from new york to the south trying hard to be a highly paid escort .
Also. I CANNOT wait until we get to Wednesday.... and we get to hear your thoughts on the American Horror Story opening.
It's a GOOD thing Terra Nova did not have its opening sequence be Josh Shannon playing acoustic guitar...... if it was I would probably never have gotten to see any tv this season since I would have thrown a blunt object at my tv screen.
This site really has a thing against 2 broke girls... Its getting annoying.
So I'm not the only one who feels that way? Good. I'm not gonna say the 2 Broke Girls intro is great (not by a longshot) but it's the best out of this bunch.
Indeed, all of them are quite terrible
Hawaii 5-0, there is no better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow, Monday's new openings are pretty awful. However, I've always liked The Lying Game's as well as the theme song. The star, Alexandra Chando, is over 18 so no worries, it's not weird.
And Rachel Bilson looks damn good in her opening... but what else is new?