The Charlie Sheen Crazy Tour Round-Up


Behold, all the Charlie Sheen news that’s fit to round-up:

... In Chuck Lorre's latest vanity card rebuttal (it aired after Monday’s Mike & Molly), the Two and a Half Men creator/showrunner went on something of a metaphysical tear himself, writing, “I believe that consciousness creates the illusion of individuation...this existential misunderstanding is the prime motivating force for the neurotic compulsion to blot out consciousness...” Lorre ends with a not-so-subtle reference to his previous series, Grace Under Fire, which was shut down because of star Brett Butler’s drug addiction and erratic behavior. Read the full card here. [ChuckLorre.com]

... Sheen called into Howard Stern this morning, where the two discussed things like porn star payroll ($30,000 gets you eight visits), his strange Apocalypse Now obsession, and Goddess sleeping arrangements. [Part 1 is embedded below; here are Part 2 and Part 3]



... John Stamos may have denied it in a tweet on Friday, but E! Online is reporting that CBS head Les Moonves has asked the actor to take over for Sheen on Two and a Half Men. It’s an idea that has the endorsement of Moonves’s wife, Big Brother and The Talk host Julie Chen. [E! Online]

... Sheen dialed back the crazy last night on Piers Morgan Tonight, backpedaling on that whole “$3 million an episode, non-negotiable” number he threw out on Monday. Ha ha! Just a joke, CBS, to lighten the mood! There’s more than a little wiggle room in there. [CNN]

... In a much longer segment on The Today Show this morning, we met Charlie’s “goddesses” Natalie Kenly and Rachel Oberlin. [Today]



...And don’t forget to tune in to 20/20 tonight for an hour inside Sheen’s world, which is a world you wish you could live in: "We win so radically in our underwear before our first cup of coffee, it's scary." [ABC News]


Obviously, this entire meltdown has been a field day for the internet, each soundbite ripe for graphic novelization or just sticking above a cute cat photo. Here are a few examples of the latest in Sheen meme:

... Tom the Dancing Bug turns Sheen into a comic crusader for justice.

... Sheen Family CircusFamily Circus with Sheen quotes for captions: Winning!

... Cats, rabbits, and sloths quote Sheen. No tigers, though, oddly enough.

... If CBS pulls the plug on the show, Boom Winning Duh could raise the curtain on the third, action-movie act to Sheen’s amazing career.

... Put down your sword and go have some fun with the Charlie Sheen Soundboard.

... Poetry-producing fingertip-haver Charlie Sheen’s words...as verse.

... Your everything guide to Sheen's personal vernacular, the Charlie Sheen Glossary.

... Charlie Sheen vs. Libya's Muammar Gaddafi: Whose line is it anyway?

... And finally, On This Day is Crazy Sheen History, we revisit 20 Minutes with the President, an imagined audience with Barack Obama authored by Sheen in which the two joke around and flatter one another before discussing the very serious matter of 9/11 being an inside job.

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Mar 17, 2011
charlie made two and a half men. no one else will be able to take his roll.the show will not be the same.and that is a shame because this is a great show.my family watches this show every week.i really don't care for him or whats going on in his life.if he can still act put him back on the show.and move on!
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Mar 08, 2011
Every time something happens in the middle east or somewhere else in the world some celebrity goes out of control and everyone is sidetracked from those events. 1993: Micheal Jackson supposedly molested a kid - Russian military and security forces clear the Russian parliament building by force ending a mass uprising against President Boris Yeltsin. 2003: Kobe Bryant raped a girl - Iraq invasion. 2007: Brittney Spears acting out - death and oil spills around the world. There are more of these and the dates are too close coincidence. The more baggage the celebrity has, the more outrageous the coverage the more people forget about the events outside the us...
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Mar 06, 2011
Charlie is not the only one with issues ... not sure on the exact percentage % (number) but everyone around the world (it includes all of america too ) have issues .. the number is high ... and it starts with the rich and trickles down to the poor.. who is at fault .. YOU R>>> leave the brother alone .. help him dont destroy him.. on that note .. help us all dont destroy us based on greed and vice >>> HOT SHOTS !!!!!
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Mar 05, 2011
NO CHARLIE, NO FREAKING TWO AND A HALF MEN!
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Mar 05, 2011
aadf
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Mar 04, 2011
hello this is charlies sheen he have to learn to stop silly things let move on he sould see his boys dont lets charlies down let him have see rights to see them boys twins poor wife she lelf out the world .... charlies is funny show with alan that is alright no problems at all with me on t.v. show let him have back on the show with men on mens show okay !!!!
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Mar 04, 2011
He is an idiot and I am so over him!
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Mar 04, 2011
He's a squirrel looking for a nut. His family must be so embarassed and ashamed of him. I'm sorry for his co-stars that are out of a job because of his craziness. Hopefully they'll get other work and move on, and when he comes back to this planet he'll be on the outside looking in.
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Mar 03, 2011
He isn't as bad as QZZY. Now that is one weird dude
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Mar 03, 2011
Way to go Charlie. You have your swagger back.
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Mar 02, 2011
Charlie Sheen vs. Libya's Muammar Gaddafi: Whose line is it anyway? - 8/10 :) It wasn't easy.
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Mar 02, 2011
EHM, WTF, is that Bree Olson, the porn star, helping him raise his children??? the blonde one...it's either her or an identical lookalike...
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Mar 02, 2011
Good lord Donald Trump, hurry up and get this train wreck on Celebrity Apprentice and I might actually watch it.
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Mar 02, 2011
Lock him in a room with Gary Busey!
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Mar 02, 2011
Charlie Sheen is his own worst enemy. Every time he opens his mouth, he makes a fool of himself. And those two, so called "goddess's, he has living with him are foolish bimbos. I for one, will never watch anything he is ever in again.
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Mar 02, 2011
It's incredible that one drug-addled has-been mediocre actor has taken over the media to this extent! Why do Americans spend so much time and energy on this useless human being when there are important matters to be considered. Have we all lost our senses, along with our jobs?
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Mar 02, 2011
Sadly, Charlie Sheen doesn't seem to be able to get out of character (Charlie Harper) anymore.
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Mar 02, 2011
Thank God the children have been removed from the "HOME" it's not safe for the babies, if he wants to kill himself then let him do it. I don't feel sorry for him, this is what he CHOSE.
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Mar 02, 2011
@reiinforcer, and even that isnt all that good!
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Mar 02, 2011
He needs to be in a rubber room and TMZ, Piers Morgan and all the network morons need to stop enabling him. Quit giving this guy attention. Thats the only way hes going to see how pathetic he has really become. I feel sorry for the guy and hope he doesnt end up dead.
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Mar 02, 2011
everything that LorieFloener said except I spell "their" correctly
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Mar 02, 2011
Who tha F..K CARES
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Mar 02, 2011
Poor John Stamos for being dragged into this. I'm happy he rejected the offer...because he is just plain awesome and deserves better!
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Mar 02, 2011
Bring on John Stamos or any actor. Its the writing not the acting.
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Mar 02, 2011
Charlie is a human with different ideas than others. Big deal, everyone has an opinion. I'll bet you disagree with a lot of stuff you hear. Hugh/Hef has been walking around with several girls on his arm for years, no one cares, people even look up to Hef. I don't want his life, but if he leaves me alone I don't care how many women he has. His children hopefully don't see anything not good for them. Why do people want to rip apart others lives is the more important question. I don't have to like his life, he does not have to like mine. People use media to feed there need to judge and be in drama. Ego, is in judgement, if someone doesn't hurt others, why should you care what they think or say. It has no control in your life. Why not talk about how much good is in the world. Wow, what a novel idea. Have a joy filled day, make a ripple that makes a smile! Lorie
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Mar 02, 2011
Ah hahahahaaa @ shocker713. So true! If Charlie isn't currently on something, which I 'highly' doubt, then his special brain is completely fried from the drugs he's already done. I hope he gets the opportunity to look back on all of this and think, "Gawd! I really said that??"
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Mar 02, 2011
charlie is a star, and a role model for all quitters world wide
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Mar 02, 2011
One time time I did tiger blood. I turned into a dragon for like 15 minutes... it was totally worth it.
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Mar 01, 2011
he's outa his mind.
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Mar 01, 2011
I hear John Stamos said no anyway. This show has been on 8 years why not just cancle it. Kind of silly for a show to be on 8 years and bring someone else to replace Charlie Sheen. That's not going to make the show better.
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Mar 01, 2011
John Stamos couldn't possibly replace Charlie Sheen...it's not like he has any experience playing a jingle writer/uncle to kids with an overly effeminate dad or anything.
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