Now we're talking! Up until last night's episode, The Secret Circle had, frankly, been coasting on the natural charms of its cast and its new-kid underdog status, seemingly bashful about giving us anything even remotely shocking or watercooler-worthy to latch onto. Why so shy, The Secret Circle? But finally things just got serious this week when the show went full-horror and expanded its supernatural universe to include demonic possession! And I was scared, you guys!
Anyway, because it's still The Secret Circle, we began the show in Nick's bedroom, where he and Melissa were testing out some sexxxy magic.
I mean, these are teen witches, so in a way this scene made the most sense of any scene on The Secret Circle to date.
Cassie was trying to figure out the backstory of the dude who'd tried to kill her a few nights prior. Everything came down to some lady who used to be friends with her mom but suddenly dropped off the radar after the accident that killed everybody's folks.
After Diana weirdly volunteered her boyfriend to accompany Cassie, they quickly arrived at a horrifying-looking fisherman ghost village? Whatever this place was, it inspired Cassie to say my very favorite line of dialogue in any TV show or movie ever: "What is this place?" In fact, Cassie loves that line so much she said it in the PILOT, too. Basically if there is an opportunity to say "What is this place" and/or run out of the room, Cassie is ALL ABOUT IT.
And the actual HOUSE they visited was almost comically nightmarish. You're telling me they live in the Pacific Northwest and don't have an insulated roof or walls? How does that work, exactly?
Anyway: Chick's been in a coma for 16 years. Obviously.
But, you know, not for long:
Yikes!! No offense to the actress (and really this is going to be most offensive thing I could possibly say), but did she kind of remind you of Zelda from Pet Sematary? (Again, I am SORRY, actress, you don't deserve that, but seriously you guys, Zelda? Y/Y?)
Anyway, for some reason Cassie was not sufficiently frightened by this experience so she decided she should up and use magic to bring the woman back to lucidity. But first, she had to show Adam her Book of Shadows.
The kid basically got such a Book of Shadows boner, am I right?
The best was how he took this centuries-old, ancient text and then absolutely manhandled it:
Be careful with that, guy! I don't see anybody rough-housing with YOUR Book of Shadows. Oh, wait, nevermind, you don't HAVE one.
So later they were at that witch clubhouse and decided to make potions out of Cassie's blood and a heaping helping of sexual tension (LOL, sure). Diana was NOT happy.
Cassie tried to be friendly and show Diana that she too had a Book of Shadows and that Diana wasn't the only one anymore.
If you've ever wanted to know what pure teenage jealousy and heartbreak looks like, here you go:
Shelley Hennig is really good in my opinion! I'm serious, it's weird how I'm totally on her character's side on the basis of a facial expression.
Speaking of people I like: FAYE. First of all, early in the episode she talked about The Craft. I just can't believe that a show about witches produced by Kevin Williamson took FOUR episodes to mention The Craft. Second of all, I AGREE with Faye. These witches need to be more like the "first part" of The Craft—you know, before the snakes. (Quick question: Now that The Craft has finally been addressed, how soon can we reasonably expect to hear a Mazzy Star song?)
Faye was hilariously quick to agree to Cassie's plan. But, you know, breaking and entering + magic = good times. Faye is the smartest.
For real, the set designers were on mushrooms or something. What was going ON here?
They broke in and tried to use magic to unfreeze the lady but it didn't seem to have an effect. And then UH-OH. The dude who lived there came back.
Phew! The girls got away.
But UH-OH again! The lady had a wriggly thing under her skin. That was NOT what I'd call a vacation.
So then the lady jumped up, which was impressive considering she hadn't moved a muscle in 16 years? Maybe the brother was doing calisthenics to her like Sally Field did to Julia Roberts in Steel Magnolias? I don't know. I can't answer all of the questions. All I know is this lady pushed her brother through a wall.
I love that Faye was just chillin' at Cassie's house. Like Faye said, they really ought to be friends! I also love that Cassie's grandmother is a nurse. That is a great way to ensure a parent-free environment. Just ask Teen Wolf!
So then Cassie had to go off and investigate a strange noise downstairs. Sure, good idea. Definitely don't ask your friend to join you despite the fact you've recently dabbled in black magic out at the haunted lagoon.
Obviously this broad was downstairs, but she was in a non-possessed state of mind so she was sobbing all kinds about Cassie's mom protecting everyone from evil and OH NO, Cassie made a terrible mistake by freeing her!
Yikes, this was scary! I realize that a higher-profile horror show just started, but The Secret Circle honestly had me more frightened. Something to do with mounting tension and likable characters? I don't know, I'm not a scientist.
Poor Cassie! This whole thing just went on and on. And that tiny little snake thing just crawled right up into this lady's brain like it owned the joint! And then THIS happened:
Faye might be deaf because the whole time this was happening, she was upstairs answering Cassie's calls and sexually harassing the callers.
Anyway, finally she went down to check on Cassie and found basically a tiny ragdoll in a jean skirt.
Gotta say, Faye seemed SCARED. I mean, wouldn't you be scared if you saw this:
Actually the part that really disturbed me was how she was knocking on the bedroom window to get Melissa and Nick's attention.
I think it scared me because it's just good horror: You can wave for help, but it won't necessarily save you.
I got so mad at this demon. Leave Faye alone!!
But then, how GANGSTER was Cassie? All running in and grabbing this lady by the hair.
It was hardcore!
Eventually Nick and Melissa came over and tussled with the demon lady, but then she just randomly ran out of the house.
Classic Cassie move! But then this:
I love how the six kids stood in tableau for about an hour just watching the coroners in silence. Definitely inconspicuous.
But OH-OH. The demon crawled out of the lady's body and onto Nick's jacket! (Because always grab a jacket when your friend is being murdered next door.) First of all, I have to say, that is an adorable demon. It's a little baby snake! Second of all, I love that The Secret Circle turned demonic possession into a physical thing. No invisible Catholic B.S. I think it's really clever, and scarier in my opinion. Credit where credit's due!
Then Adam came over to help Cassie clean up the debris and told her he agreed with her about her decision to free the demon. WHAT? Get real, Adam, that makes no sense. Even Cassie was like, "Yeah that was an a-hole move on my part."
ANYWAY, the cool part about the demon crawling onto Nick's jacket was that I was like, "Whoa, Nick might finally become interesting! Way to go, The Secret Circle!"
But then WHOOPS, The Secret Circle! That was the wrong witch! Oh well, the previews allude to the fact that she might murder Nick, so that works too! Team Melissa (have I complimented Melissa yet?)!!
All in all, I really enjoyed this episode. It had a handful of great WTF moments, and still brought the character work that's so lacking in a certain other sister show. (Yeah, I said it.)
... What did YOU think of this episode?
... Is one of these witches about to bite the dust?
... Did you miss the parents this week?
... How much do you want to live in a brokedown Applebee's?