While the cast and crew are overseas in Thailand, I thought we could take a quick tour of the Bachelorette manor. The top-secret floor plan below is both a revealing glimpse into ABC’s process and a peek at the luxurious playpen that many male and female contestants have called, however briefly, home.
Click on the image to enlarge it. The Martini Glass Symbol denotes an open bar.
1. The Shiny Driveway Leads to the palatial estate.
2. Rose Room Situated so the exiting bachelors have a quick journey out to the van.
3. Chris Harrison’s All-Nite 70’s Themed Disco Roller rink Chris Harrison’s beloved side business has been in continuous operation since Season 3 and is rumored to have the best nachos West of Mulholland Drive.
4. Man Barracks Bunk-bed central for the lucky contestants.
5. Cocktail Party Room The most on-camera part of the house.
6. Kizzen Bachelorette Manor’s state-of-the-art kitchen is equipped specifically for Deep South Bayou cooking, with several deep fryers, tanks of swamp crawdads, and barrels of sorghum, as specified in Chris Harrison’s contract.
7. Whispering Patio Traditionally, contestants have felt most comfortable gossiping and whispering intrigues amidst the rattan furniture of the breezy Whispering Patio.
8. Mammer Jammer A small workout room with a treadmill and free weights, so-called because Chris Harrison refers to all exercise as “Mammer Jammer.”
9. Portrait Room On-camera: a room where the Bachelorette contemplates tiny framed head shots of her intended. Off-camera: several noisy vending machines.
10. First-Floor Tea Light Storage The entire top floor of the manor is also tea light storage.
11. The Falconry As you may have guessed from the frequent shots of falcons in the last few episodes, Chris Harrison is grooming these exquisite birds of prey. He is known to feed them scraps of raw meat as they perch on his leather gauntlet while he strategizes with producers.
12. Red Room The bedroom where Master Reed died several years ago. Producers keep the bachelors in line by threatening to lock them up in there overnight.
13. Lil’ Bali The hallway just beyond the cocktail party room is a psychedelic, tea light-lit tribute to the staff’s favorite destination.
14. Delousing Station Experience has proven that a prison-style delousing is necessary for every contestant, no matter how charming he may be.
15. Harrison Hall A concealed crawlspace where Chris Harrison can travel invisibly throughout the Manor, eavesdropping on conversations and seeing the unseen. His cat-like steps are completely silent, yet staff will sometimes hear his airy laughter overhead or his haunting tenor ringing through the halls.
16. JC Penney Satellite Store Where the contestants can choose daily from piles of cargo shorts, black flip flops, and lightweight Henley shirts.
17. Last Known Whereabouts of Michelle Kujawa
Michelle, a contestant from Jake Pavelka’s “Wings of Love” season, was last seen by the crew with a squirrel’s tail dangling from her mouth at the edge of the woods that surround the Manor. To the best of her family’s knowledge, she remains unmarried.