True Blood: Remember to Forget

True Blood S05E06: "Hopeless"

The weirdest contradiction that True Blood's always embodied is that it's TOO MUCH show yet at the same time it's never enough. For a series that employs upwards of eight separate plotlines in any given episode, too often it feels like nothing is actually happening. Or, more likely, certain plotlines tread water for several episodes at a time while others race forward into narrative overdrive. It can can be jarring and unsatisfying, but at least the scene changes every few minutes so it's hard to be too bored. Last week's episode, "Let's Boot and Rally" was an episode in which the weaker plotlines played catch-up, but except for a shocking conclusion, "Hopeless" felt A LOT like your typical midseason stalling tactic. On the upside it was written by series mastermind Alan Ball, so even the inconsequential scenes were better-written than usual. So yeah, credit where credit's due!

Anyway, let's assess these storylines!

 


SQUARE DANCE (Bill, Eric, Sookie, and Alcide)


Last week's episode concluded with the discovery of a nearly healthy Russell Edgington and a growling Alcide getting violently pulled out of frame, so that's where "Hopeless" began. Apparently in his short post-burial existence, Russell had ALREADY recruited a bunch of werewolves to be his new minions, so it wasn't long before Alcide, Eric, and Bill were murdering werewolves right and left, thereby littering the floor with dead, naked dudes. Meanwhile Russell approached Sookie looking for a quick sip, but she pushed him away with her patented faerie fireball. (It honestly reminds me of Street Fighter II every time.)

And JUST when Eric was poised to end Russell once and for all, Bill intervened, urging Eric to turn Russell over to the Authority. Fortunately the representatives of the Authority arrived just in time to make Eric's decision easier.

Specifically this guy arrived. He is scary!

This probably won't surprise you, but Best Entrance Award went to Alcide:

Anyway, scary Authority dude forced Bill and Eric to wipe the humans' memories, so in a rather poignant scene Bill "erased" Sookie's memory of the night's events and also made her forget about Bill entirely, just for good measure.

I wasn't aware that Sookie was even capable of being glamored (had that ever happened before?), so it was unclear if she was pretending to be glamored or not, and also whether Bill believed he was glamoring her or if they were both just role-playing for the benefit of the Authority.

Anyway, I loved when Eric glamored Alcide:

That look on his face! Because Eric is sort of a jerk, he glamored Alcide into being slightly repulsed by Sookie so as to fully and completely cockblock the two. Typical Eric.

Later, after Doug the construction worker and the surviving members of Russell's pantry were rounded up and put on a bus, the scary Authority dude assured them he would glamor them all to make them forget their horrors. But then he just went and massacred them! What did that mean? Was he a secret Sanguinista (who do not believe in co-existence), or was he just too lazy to glamor them all? It was unclear! But yeah, this plotline was great.

Grade: B+



FAERIE DANGEROUS (Jason and Sookie)


Meanwhile in a suspiciously dreamlike scene, Jason "awoke" to find his dead father sitting on the couch staring at him benevolently. After Jason gave a sincere speech pledging to find whatever vampire killed his father and mother, Mr. Stackhouse ominously replied, "The only thing you have to fear is—" And then nothing! He got cut off when Jason woke up for real. Uh-oh, what was that last part, Mr. Stackhouse? We may never find out.

Anyway, the next time we saw Jason he was in Merlotte's trying to convince Sookie to go with him to that secret faerie nightclub in the enchanted meadow or wherever. He failed to mention to her that the club is THE WORST, because seriously it is the worst. Ugh, who designed that place? What were those dancers even DOING on that stage?

Anyway, Sookie only went because she'd heard Hadley was there and Sookie was NOT a fan of the faeries so she felt Hadley was in danger. But it wasn't long before Hadley and some guy claiming to be Claudine's brother informed Sookie that they weren't evil faeries, they were just a chill splinter group that liked to hang out in nightclubs designed by the world's tackiest child.

But then we got another piece of the dead-parent puzzle. In a flashback we saw Sookie's parents get stopped on a bridge by a mysterious figure who then sniffed out an old Band-Aid of Sookie's in the back seat. Had they been murdered because the vampire was a fan of faerie blood? Again, so far 100% of the evidence that the Stackhouses were murdered by vampires has been planted and/or implanted by vampire-hating faeries, so this whole thing was still not the most convincing story. And Sookie didn't seem to believe it either! That's why she hilariously responded to Claude's story by immediately throwing a faerie-ball in his face. It kind of sputtered out before it landed though, and then the entire club did THIS to Sookie:

Ugh, faeries.

You know, I appreciate the mystery of this plotline as well as the increasingly complicated conflicts between the different "supes." But I just don't give a dang about faeries. They seem awful in almost every way. Sorry!

Grade: C



FIRED (Terry, Patrick, and Arlene)


This plotline improved a lot last week when we finally learned about how Terry and Patrick came to be cursed by an Ifrit and how awesome the spirit looks while burning a dude alive. And this episode began promisingly with a truly impressive bit of CGI work (and I'm still LOLing at Terry's running). Unfortunately not much else happened after that, except that Patrick saw the Ifrit for himself and Terry's PTSD seemed to return in full force.

It's not often that we get to see the mountains of Louisiana, so that was pretty cool. The Louisiana mountains definitely don't appear on TV on a regular basis.

This plotline ended on a major sad note: Terry decided that so long as the Ifrit was after him, Arlene and the kids wouldn't be safe. So he left her! Total Edward Cullen move. Man, it was tough to see Arlene get so torn up about it, but honestly she's probably better off. Back to the maniac-dating pool, lady.

Grade: C-



MOMS SAY THE DARNEDEST THINGS (Lafayette and Ruby Jean)


In a quick but terrific scene between Lafayette and his mother Ruby Jean (played by the always awesome Alfre Woodard), we learned that she possessed some important knowledge of what was happening with Jesus' severed head: Apparently that desert brujo Jesus and Lafayette had visited during Season 4 was actually a total villain and had somehow trapped Jesus' soul in the afterlife. Or something? I don't know, I'm still waiting for some kind of acknowledgment that Marnie flew into Lafayette's mouth at the end of Season 4. That happened, right? Or did I dream that up? Either way, this scene was great because it demonstrated that Ruby Jean might be in the full throes of schizophrenia, but she was still hilarious and narratively valuable. I truly hope we'll get to see more of her.

Grade: B+



BFFs NO MORE (Tara, Jessica, Pam, and Hoyt)


Over at Fangtasia (where Pam had taken to sitting in Eric's abandoned throne), Jessica and Tara's vampire-throwdown spilled out of the bathroom and into the bar. After some supersonic catfight tussling, Pam eventually intervened and dragged Tara out of there by the hair!

Pam seemed pretty upset with her protege for messing up the bar's good-time atmosphere. But in a slightly touching twist, Pam admitted that Tara's fighting skills had made her proud out there. Aw!

Hoyt decided to rub it in Jessica's face that she'd essentially fought with Tara due to jealousy and therefore Jessica still liked Hoyt. In response, Jessica stated as plainly as possible that getting back together would never be an option. We could tell by Jessica's uncertainty that she was confused by the whole mess, but by the time she stormed out it was pretty clear that Hoyt had no chance with her.

The next time we saw Hoyt, he was casually letting a (male!) vampire drain him nearly to death in some back alley. That's when a van full of supe-murderers pulled up in their Obama masks and murdered the vampire! Not only that, but they recognized Hoyt and dragged him into the van for supposed protection. Whoops, plotlines were starting to cross!

Really any plotline involving Pam, Tara, and Jessica gets a B at minimum, but I just wish more had happened here. Maybe next week?

Grade: B



JOB APPLICATION (Alcide)


After having his memory erased in a slightly homoerotic moment with Eric, Alcide woke up in Sookie's bed unclear on what exactly had happened the night before.

Sookie assured him they had not slept together, but when she attempted to touch him he recoiled in disgust. Haha, good one, Eric! Anyway, we then confirmed that Sookie had not been glamored after all, and also she had the ability to undo others' glamoring as well. So she used that particular power to restore Alcide's memories, which caused him to become infuriated with vampires and the werewolves who assist them.

Next thing we knew Alcide stormed into the barn where his former pack had been hanging out and challenged the leader to his claim as pack master. When informed that somebody had to second Alcide's claim, none of the other wolves offered a second. That is, until the foxy woman from the first episode stood up and made eyes at Alcide before seconding him. Uh-oh, looked like a a major werewolf brawl was a-brewin'!

Although I was bummed to see the Alcide-Sookie relationship fizzle, I do like Alcide in general and it'll be rad to see him finally take the reins of his pack in a meaningful way. Let's be real, the wolves in this world are as weaksauce as possible. At least in The Vampire Diaries their bites can kill a vampire, but in True Blood the wolves just run around and become drug addicts and occasionally turn into naked dead dudes. Whip these puppies into shape, Alcide!

Grade: B-



SHIFTIN' INTO GEAR (Sam, Luna, Andy, and Martha)


After the shooting in Luna's front yard, Emma turned into a werewolf puppy and apparently ran all the way to her biological grandma's house. She even ran through a bad part of town and everything! Honestly, I liked Emma's thinking because if I was ever in trouble I would immediately enlist Martha for protection also. Lady seems SERIOUS.

Bad news: Luna and Sam both survived the shooting and seemed to be pretty okay almost immediately. Ugh, very disappointing. But when Martha brought Emma to the hospital, some awkward words were spoken and Luna eventually decided that Martha could be a part of Emma's life so long as she and her pack protected Emma from the band of murderers targeting shifters.

Later, Sam got Andy to agree to help them find whoever shot at them. This led them both back to the ammunition store where a shifty-eyed sales clerk made the mistake of reaching for his shotgun just as Sam was holding a fully-equipped crossbow. Whoops! One supe-murderer down, several more to go. That is, if we were to believe they were simply a pack of murderous hicks and not pawns of a larger werewolf or faerie agenda.

This plotline was not my favorite. I'm still intrigued by the anti-supernatural klan aspect of things, but I am not and probably never will be interested in Sam and Luna. I mean come on, True Blood, don't make me think a lame character has been killed off only to have her be very alive in the next episode. Not cool.

Grade: C-



RESPECT MAH... (Authority and Russell)


Here's where the Authority plotline really started getting great. In exchange for helping track down Russell Edgington, Roman allowed Bill and Eric to remove their heart-piercing jewelry and even toasted the whole gang with some centuries-old blood. Which was too disgusting to even think about, really. But still, everyone was in a great mood! Except maybe for Salome who hilariously kept trying to edge her way out the door so she could "interrogate" Russell again. Cool it, lady. But it's worth noting that she wasn't the only one who had an interest in Russell: Bill had seemed overly eager to keep him alive also, don't you think?

Anywho, it should go without saying that just before Roman executed Russell Edgington, the tables were turned in a ludicrously easy way and suddenly Roman's ornamental stake of doom was pointing at HIS OWN heart. "Peace is for pussies," Russell eloquently explained before murdering one of the oldest vampires in history.

I mean, I THINK he murdered Roman. Roman didn't explode or anything. His face just started morphing like some bad .GIF:

But in a chilling coda, we saw Nora writhing in ecstatic joy in her cell. Apparently Roman's death at the hands of Russell was all part of some kind of prophecy that would somehow precede the return of Lillith? At least I think that's what she was yammering about. Whatever the case, Nora seemed pretty stoked about everything:

Not gonna lie, I am STILL confused about the differences between the Authority and the Sanguinistas. Both of them believe in Lillith as their god? One of them wants to enslave humans while the other wants to cohabitate while occasionally mass murdering them? I don't know. I just think that maybe the Authority is not the best-defined faction this show has presented so far. I kind of wish they operated more like an atheistic corporation and not like a tiny, select membership of religious fundamentalists. And how does the monarchy stuff factor in? Someone make me a flowchart of how the vampire government is organized because I do NOT get it.

All that being said, this was a terrific storyline. Roman's death was pretty shocking and even better was Russell's full-strength return to form. He is the best!

Grade: A



CONCLUSION


It's easy to say that this episode didn't feel particularly compelling because it's only episode 6; we all know that a certain amount of setup needs to happen before a season really gets underway. But that's not necessarily true for other shows. I never really feel like Breaking Bad bides its time before tipping the first domino. Similar shows like Teen Wolf or The Vampire Diaries manage to make midseason episodes feel important. "Hopeless" was a bit of a letdown in that regard. However, the presence of Alan Ball's dialogue certainly helped the overall entertainment value, and I'm still captivated by many of the plotlines. Here's hoping that next week's episode represents a larger step forward than this episode was.

Overall Grade: B-


QUESTIONS:

... Will Lillith be showing up soon? Or have we met her already?

... Do you care about what happened to the Stackhouse parents?

... Who's really behind the anti-supe violence?

... Would you want Eric to gingerly rub his blood into YOUR wounds?

Comments (98)
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NO MORE TIME WASTING!! Trim the fat in this series. I now watch this show when I'm in the mood only. This is no longer "must-see TV"
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"Roman's death was pretty shocking" ... you must have been ironic here. To be shocked you have to be surprised : this was almost painted on the walls.
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Indeed, that was fairly obvious for me. Salome is a pretty transparent villain.
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The only thing I don't like about Pam and Tara's relationship is that I think the writers are just trying to placate to all of those lame complainers who hate Tara for stupid reasons. So all of these people who hate Tara get to see her get abused by Pam. Kind of white on black vengeance if you ask me. I love that tara is a vampire and I love the banter between the two. I'll like their relationship more if Pam treated Tara more like Eric treated her. With tenderness, love and respect.
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It seems tradition for TB to always crawl at its plot the first few episodes and then propel into awesome. I guess the Go button is now hit with Russell back in full force. Fasten your seat belts and bring it on !
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Erm, Roman is not one of the most ancient vampires, hes only like 500, in comparason with Russell, Eric, Goodric etc thats pretty lame.
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I was confused that you didn't know some things about the show, but then I remembered you aren't Lily Sparks lol.

1) It's well established early in Season 1 that Sookie can't be glamoured

2) Marnie flew into Lafayette in the second last ep of season 4. The last episode, Marnie killed Jesus while in Lafayette's body and was exorcised in the end.

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That last scene was almost the only watchable scene in the entire episode. Halfway through I was ready to turn it off, since NOTHING had happened, and it had felt like over an hour of show had already gone by.

BTW, since when is Sookie's origin story the same as Harry Potter's?
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Fast forward. Eric. Fast forward. Eric. Fast forward. Alcide. Fast forward. Pam (avoid Tara if possible, unless berated by Pam for general suckiness). Fast forward. Eric. Fast forward. Eric. Fast forward. Alcide. Fast forward. Eric
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Ha ha! Eric is the best:) And I think Tara will benefit from Pam's awesomeness and will turn into a decent character
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I don't understand why everyone was just standing around at the end. I understand shock but these are hundreds of year old vampires, have super speed, and yet are so dumbfounded that they do nothing. I don't care if it's a ploy to move the plot forward but it make it somewhat credible and believable, while still being about vampires.
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Yeah, let's ditch Hoyt -- if he had any less personality, he'd melt into the ground. He's not even good in the books. More Eric, Bill, and Sookie, please. They really don't seem to have a fix on what the faeries are all about, do they? Personally, in the books, I LOVED Niall, Sookie's Great Grandfather. Now HE was a bad ass! I'd love to see him real soon -- along with Bubba! They were two of my very favorite book characters.
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Super-shallow comment: This show is kind of well known for all the gratuittous sex and nudity, but they seem to be going out of their way these days to avoid it. (sex scenes with clothes on, stripclub scenes where everyone is clothed??) Is this like an international syndication thing? Please, True Blood, stick to your strengths! Don't try to be classy!
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Obviously Sookie was not glamoured because in season 1 she asked bill to glamour her and he was unable to, they were just pretending for the sake of the authority. This season is not as satisfying as all the previous seasons, I have been waiting for something big to happen but honestly nothing has caught my eye. I am still waiting for the " edge of my seat" experience that I used to get when I watched trueblood.
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Looks like Salome lied about silvering Russel intravenously. That just proved my theory of her being the Authority mole.
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I think 2 of the most annoying characters right now are Hoyt and Tara. Tara seems two dimensional. She used to be the "Pity-me" girl (monotone whiner), now she's the "Bad-assed" vamp-girl (again, playing her monotone). I just don't like her. She never seems to bring much to any episode she's in. Hoyt with his new "look" just kind of creeps me out. He too doesn't bring anything to any episode. I also think they should have Sookie stop playing musical beds. She seemed like a sweet and innocent girl in season 1, by saying "she didn't date much", to now being "hump happy". She's getting a bit annoying to come to think about it. She's got all these guys wanting her, yet she has the personality of a turnip....
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I really enjoyed reading this review and the others that have been written about true blood, but it has been made very clear that sookie cannot be glamoured. the scene between her and bill would lose its poignance if you weren't aware that bill was actually telling sookie not to think of him and eric. also, she remembered everything and was crying, so, duh. the sam/luna story is really growing on me. actually, after this episode I am much more interested in all of the plot lines. even the fire demon. I just love watching what true blood does and how everything will connect, so I am totally down with just enjoying it and its absurdities.

1) yes, she will. and if we have met her she is salome. maybe, I have no idea, but salome is one freaky chick.

2) yes! but I think it's going to make jason go all anti-vampire again, so that's a bummer.

3) crazy rednecks.

4). yes.

side note: roman probably isn't totally dead, right? I mean, he was pretty fantastic and I would love to see more russell/roman action. I guess as long as russell is around being the most psychotic psychopath since franklin, all is right in Bon Temps.
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Price, why is it that no matter the show, your recaps are so much better than everyone else? From the snark to the GIF's it's like night and day. You might as well do everything.
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I second that.
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It was also obvious he wasn't glamouring Sookie because he raised his eyebrow slightly, as in "be quiet and go along with what I am about to say".....I also think - as many viewers commenting do - that Roman was killed off too soon :(

Anyway: 1. We will probably meet her soon; 2. Kind of, I just hope it's not Bill!! 3. Rednecks 4. Eric can rub his blood/hands all over me :))) I love this show, even the dumb plot lines are fun in their own way (except for last season's werepanthers-yuck)...some episodes are better than others and that's to be expected...lighten up folks!!
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Something else: is it relevant in any way that Roman was wearing Nike clothes?Was that really like an essential point to make? If it was an ad of some kind, making him die/morph in the end did not serve the brand very well.Ok, just trying to be less serious after that last post.
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BTW, did you notice that scroll over the reception as Eric and Bill out from the lift is made up of loosely Hebrew and Arabic alphabets ? It would be interesting that Vampires are Semites, which was already implied, against the modern racial theories that make Indo-European races so called superior. I am mentioning this as a clue that the Obama masks should be seen in that context.

If the Vampire Bible indicates anything, is that basically it is a racist text and that vampirism has been seen as a sexual metaphor mostly in recent times, it is also metaphor of all that is wrong with elitism. Somehow this subtext, which was clear in the Harry Potter books with all the muggles vs pure bloods, is topical to how we are interpreting fantasy and mythology within current events.
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"I wasn't aware that Sookie was even capable of being glamored (had that ever happened before?), so it was unclear if she was pretending to be glamored or not, and also whether Bill believed he was glamoring her or if they were both just role-playing for the benefit of the Authority."



Wow, really? I mean, I know you answered your question later in the article, but I don't think anyone was confused about that. That's what made it so poignant, and sookie so obviously moved during and after. Why else would she CRY in the van with Alcide after with Alcide just being confused? Sookie could not be glamoured, I dont think anyone forgot that.



Also, who said Roman was one of the oldest vampires out there? I mean yeah, it is inferred I guess, but they weren't terribly clear what one has to do to be him or a member of the authority council. Heck, they made Bill a king! (I figured usually it was a power structure too, but I agree the heriarchy thing is a bit vague. Still with that being said I thought you had to be a super powerful vampire to be king in general, which Bill sort of isn't due to his age).
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Anyone who forgot Sookie can't be glamoured is an idiot since it has come up several time now. It pains me.



Oh and by the way, Roman was roughly 500 years old so he was by no means one of the oldest vampires.
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Now if only Alan Ball would write the rest of the season!
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i think Lillith's will come back as Nora, thats why she's so excited about everything happening.

i do kind of care what happened to mr. & mrs. stackhouse but only if the vampire that killed them is someone we already know, otherwise its just yet another character to keep track of.
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Its probably Russell, seeing as he seems to be so enamoured by fairy blood.
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I really want to know who killed Sookie's parents. I think it's a safe bet to rule out Bill from the list of suspects because it's obvious that they will reunite by the end of the season. Besides, the writers have already made a complete douchebag out of him when they revealed that he was behind the attack on Sookie in season 1, and I doubt they'll go twice the same route. I think Bill is a conniving opportunist and it would make sense that he could have been the murderer, but I doubt A. Ball would allow to ruin the precious Sookie/Bill romance in that manner.
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Although the episode was an improvement over the rest of the season it's still going in slow-motion. And oh boy was the end predictable! It was like watching an old slasher movie where you knew exactly who would die before the end. Bill being like the dumb blonde (no offense to blondes) who thinks it's a good idea to take a shower in the haunted house while there's a murderer lurking about. Keep Russel alive?!? Either he's plain stupid or he knows something the rest of 'em doesn't. I'm hoping for the latter, or all hope might seem lost for that guy. And was the whole slaughtering the buss full of surviving humans supposed to be a big shocker?

I did find the whole end a bit odd though. There we are in a room with several of the most powerful and ancient vampires in existence and they get "surprised" by Russel? They all had ample time to react before the stake went in. At least Bill and Eric should've tried cause they know they're pretty much fucked if/when Russel gets ahold of 'em.. I suppose the rest of 'em are all Borritos.. Sanguanistas.. Whatever ;)



As for the rest of the filler storylines.. Terry could just go die in a ditch somewhere for all I care. Tara has always been annoying and should've stayed dead. Lafaette is fun and enjoyable but this story is just dull. I've liked Sam's shifter storylines in past seasons but this one isn't doing it for me. Hoyt... *sigh*... Fairy Rouge.. Please spare me!



Sometimes I wonder why I'm still watching this.. Only 6 episodes left though.. We'll see if I can stick to it..
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One more thing. Best line the entire season was Eric Nordman's "Fuck Sookie" in the first episode. I was so glad to get rid of that whole triangle. It has outstayed it's welcome by about 2-3 seasons. Is it the fairy blood that makes every single shifter/wolf/vampire pine for Sookie? It gets tiresome to watch, that is all.

I was greatly disappointed when they where all back in Camp Sookie just shortly after.
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The relationship between Ruby Jean and Lafayette has really taken on a new dimension. It seems that she possesses the same natural powers he has as a medium. It may be possible that what she has seen because of her powers is what made her the way she is and fractured her mind. This would really add a new layer to things because Lafayette would see what could happen to him if he was overwhelmed by his powers.
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I was under the impression that Nora was trying to send a message to Eric, about Salom. Or maybe she believes that Salom is Lillith somehow? That last scene confused me.
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I'm kinda amused of how many of you are disappointed by the Authority's lack of smartness and wisdom. In corporations and governments alike incompetent, brownnosed, scheming and cocky behaviour is not so uncommon - why should "they" be any different than "us"?

I had a chuckle from Romans "... I don't know about these fancy antique bloods, but they cost a fucking fuckload of money!"
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Because unlike our corporations and governments, the Authority is thousands of years old and it would seem that they'd eventually need to know what they're doing. Otherwise, "they" shouldn't be different than "we"....and they should've fallen centuries ago like all ours do.
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On one hand, I agree with Acrobit. You survive for centuries / millenium and "rule" over who-knows-how-many selfish vamps... you'd better have your act together. Don't be naive / gullible. Act more wise.



On the other hand, they're power beings that have BEEN around for a while... meaning chances are they've always been super power (muscles + politics). That breeds laziness. I imagine that some of the problem-CEOs on Wallstreet were real go-getters in the beginning. And eventually became lazy and creedy due to their trappings.
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Sure, that's possible, and in this instance, it's what's happening, but this is exactly where the problem with the writing lies. It's not that they're stupid; Sookie's stupid. The problem's that they're so suddenly stupid. Like they did everything right all their immortal lives until the show came and took over their bodies, forcing them to do everything that would've gotten them killed long ago.



The Authority has been around for millennia, meting out justice and punishment, and maintaining and restoring order, holding onto power with iron fists....but *now*, approximately a few days into Season 5's timeline, they're all just falling apart and going to shit. The Cataclysmic Clusterf**k of Prophecy, now coming to pass, etc.



Roman: "Bring Russell Edgington--likely the most powerful living vampire I know--to me alive so I can kill him within reach of all the senior members...by remote control so I don't get my $130 Nike golf shirt bloody with my ancient enemy...after I just got my $1400 suit bloody with annoying child vampire."



Things like this are 24-level screwups, where every character on the board has done pretty much everything in their careers flawlessly *until* Jack Bauer shows up and starts the clock, then The Greatest Clusterf**k that 24 Hours Can Allow happens. Again.



Stupid can be fun sometimes, but it's still stupid.
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Yeah, I'm not even sure they've been around that long, but without being told otherwise, you'd have to think they've been a power longer than Eric's been alive. Imagine The Authority being formed 500 years ago. Eric would still be 500 years old and pretty badass. He's the one with the 'Godric Bloodline,' and with his personality, why would *he* bow to a group like that? It was already stupid for the Queen to act like she was his boss, as she was only 200 (and LAME), but it was the power of the Authority that Eric respected...as the story went.



Also, in the first season, Bill threatened Malcolm (the gay 600-year old with the black girl and the mexican guy) to take matters to the Queen--a higher authority than Eric--if he didn't cool it in Bon Temps. It doesn't make sense for all these old guys to follow the will of a bunch of scrubs.



Not to say that isn't the case, it just doesn't make sense, and it would be more bad writing.
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Mmm... you're right. It's just too stupid to think of old vampires behaving like that. Funny but stupid.

But are you sure the Authority's around for millennia? Didn't Russell mock the Authority for being around "just" for about 500 years whereas he is over 3000 years old? But why would then Roman be one of the most powerful vamps alive? I'm confused ...
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... Will Lillith be showing up soon? Or have we met her already?



There was a casting call for episode 7 for a character named "Lil." I think it would be lazy writing on behalf of the writers to create a character named Lil and Lilith. From my understanding, Lil is to be a recurring character who shows up nekkid and has no lines in her first episode. Initially, I thought it was going to be a fae but I'm leaning more towards Lil being Lilith.



... Do you care about what happened to the Stackhouse parents?



F*cking fairies. If it's true that vamps killed Corbett and Michelle, I will be ready to punch a hole through the wall. I think it's just fairy bullsh*t but with Alan Ball, I don't know.



... Who's really behind the anti-supe violence?



Not sure about the show, but it seems strangely book-like. I guess Alan Ball did read the Cliff Notes on this book.



... Would you want Eric to gingerly rub his blood into YOUR wounds?



Blood, body, mouth...sign me up!
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First I loved the off comment implication that Roman was a tool during the Renaissance. Hilarious stuff. And Ruby Jean's whole "Jesus is in trouble. SAVE Jesus!!" thing had me in fits. Again, I do enjoy the fairy stuff more than others seem to.



-I hope Lillith shows up soon. Either that or they better be setting her up as a Big Bad for next season.

-I do, just because if it's anything like what happens in the books, I think it could lead to some pretty cool stuff.

-I don't know, but I'm rather concerned about that. It doesn't seem like it'll be going well for the citizens of Bon Temps.

-Not really. But Jessica on the other hand....
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1. I have no clue, I'm thinking we won't meet her. It's a ludicrous story that I assumed was the vampire equivalent of religious types preaching Jesus will return and everyone just kind of nods along and lets them think that.

2. I don't care what happened to Mr & Mrs Stackhouse. Unless it is a vampire we already know who killed them aka Eric, Bill, Russell, Pam?

3. I hope it's people we already know of! If it's some randomers I'll be mad.

4. Yes. A million times yes.



My general thoughts are the same as ever, trim the fat. Anyway, somehow I think Roman may not die, we didn't see him explode and if there is one thing we have learnt from True Blood in later seasons is that the amazing cliffhangers are backed out of at the beginning of the next episode. Sam and Luna being shot and perfectly fine is one example.



Btw, am I the only one waiting for some kind of three way between Roman, Bill and Eric? No, just me? Never mind.
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Price's comment about not being aware that Sookie could be glamoured... he kinda admit he completely everything that happen in season 1, didn't he?



Fairies can't be glamoured, Price... she was completely faking it. And Bill knew it too. And yeah, Sookie can also de-glamoures people - that was already explain last season. Dude, do you ever pay attention?



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In his defense, a few posts ago he mentioned that he was taking over the recaps from someone else. So he's probably not as up-to-date as she was on the older stuff.



Though, one comment threw me. He seemed surprised that Sookie could remove glamours. Ignoring past seasons, that was something we saw her do just LAST WEEK.
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Yeah, but last week, it took Sookie the entire episode to get the guy to remember, and Alcide took a good 5 seconds. Dunno why they made it so different (Lilith's ultra-super glamour?) but that part could confuse a couple people that are busy covering half a tv website.
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Nah, he remembered everything by the time she was done at the parking garage... it was just all fuzzy. Driving to the asylum, she was just reading his mind to make things easier / quicker.



Though why his was only restored fuzzy, and Alcide was restored enough for him to throw a tantrum... who knows. Maybe Lilith has more "game" than Eric. Or maybe Eric didn't try TOO hard since he figured Sookie would just repair it tomorrow.
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Okay, not the entire episode, but the point was that it was a drawn-out process with that guy, but yeah, Alcide was glamoured by Eric (who should also be pretty good at it by now), and Sookie wiped it away in a few seconds.



I guess Eric would figure Sookie would just remove it as soon as she figured it out, but that seemed like another reason not to actually bother with it. Eric could've pretended just like Bill did with Sookie. At least it was funny and dickish.



The Authority should really be...smart. I might've liked that.
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I was amazed how fast I began to hate this series again after the premiere. I enjoyed the first couple episodes, but keeping up with all these subplots... it's the same complaint I had with the last three seasons. They really need to reduce the number of characters in this show, or do it like Game of Thrones: only focus on so many each episode. Don't give me every character all at once. It's too much.
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I don't like how GoT does that either. They bring in Red Yoko and then not show her for almost half the season. They really only get about as much done as True Blood per year, only it's more interesting.
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What can I even say about True Blood any more? It's already been well established that many characters just need to die already, and I'd hoped that Luna's death would be the start of a good cull. But alas no, I was left to shout at the television in disgust at True Blood's fear of letting go. The whole authority/Russell thing is still compelling at the minute, and I was just generally hoping that Lucy Griffiths wouldn't die, because...Lucy Griffiths. I'm a big fan of Denis O'Hare so more bad ass Russell will be good, I'm just scared of how they're going to try to fit Eric and Bill into this plot, that by this point seems too big to involve two vampires whose main problem tends to be Sookie. I can't be bothered even worrying about all the faerie s**t and though I love Pam and Jessica, everything in Fangtasia seemed very boring this episode. I was also hoping that Hoyt would die, but alas no. I will continue to watch this season mostly for the main storyline and my favourite characters, but other than that, True Blood needs to sort it's background s**t out. I used to like characters like Terry when he was just an interesting character in the background, but I do not want to see him running away from a smoke monster (I watched Lost, so I've had my lifetime fill of smoke monsters). I've probably forgotten comments I wished to make on the episode, but I'm getting very tired of writing negatively about this, so I'll just say, lets hope for some improvement True Blood!
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1.yep. we don't know her unless she will inhabit a host,like Roman or Eddington. Also, we know that both Bill and Eric survive to the next season and since Eddington would kill them on the spot,logically he should be dead pretty early next episode.Another scenario would be that Eric and Bill having had Nora's unwilling insight will kill Eddington and by some wierd law become the leaders of the Authority. (?)

2.Yes. I think the whole series and books hinges on that murder.

3.Unknowing allies of either the Euthority or Sanganistas who are being played into levelling the field.I would balance more towards the Sanganistas if not for that picture in that gun shop of that fundamentalist bigot turned vampire, forgot his name,sorry.

4.No.
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Oh, I forgot to answer the questions lol



... Will Lillith be showing up soon? Or have we met her already?

Nope, I'm pretty sure Lillith will show up soon.





... Do you care about what happened to the Stackhouse parents?

Yes, if the writers are taking time to direct us in this story then there must be something there.





... Who's really behind the anti-supe violence?

They had on Obama masks ... that was done on purpose. No TV show or film just place things in them for no reason. They are placed there because there is a message they are trying to send. I'm not sure who is 'behind' them, I'm just assuming ignorant humans but I have a feeling it's deeper than that.





... Would you want Eric to gingerly rub his blood into YOUR wounds?

No comment...lol
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I think the Obama masks were both:



- using presidents' masks to commit crimes is common (for reasons stated below)



-and-



- the intolerance of the racists is situational...ly ironic with them choosing masks of the first black president (...no matter what that idiot Morgan Freeman thinks. That man has freckles).



Also, in that movie with Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze where Swayze was with a team of bank robbers, the robber in the Nixon mask said stuff like "I am not a crook!" Usually predictable, but kinda funny.
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As for the masks, it's actually cliche that when comitting a crime you wear a presidential mask. Regan, Nixon, Bush, etc. It's very common on TV. Probably because they're easy as heck to find/buy and thus hard to track them down. It's always a recent-enough president that people would recognize... instead of some generic white-haired guy that MIGHT look like a dollar-bill.



Using Obama... well, it COULD mean something political. Or could just be a play on the old cliche: use a president's mask.



The "YES WE CAN" bit was funny though.
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do you think Salome is Russell's child?
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I think whoever rescued Russel was either his Maker or one of his Children.



So if Salome is nobody special, then I could see her being Russel's child.



Otherwise, she COULD also be Lilith and hiding her identity. And I guess Russel COULD be old enough to be one of Lilith's children.
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I think if the author knew more about the "illuminati contraversy" they would understand the "authority" storyline a little bit better with Lillith. That story-line just screams Illuminati and considering the year we are in and the things that's about to happen with our economy, not to mention the 99% vs. 1%, them vs. us thing happening in the world right now. (IE: Vampires co-habitating with the humans or going into a civil war with the humans)



I'm really digging the writing and everything this season. I must say; character turn around of the century is Tara! WOW WOW WOW I love her now. I loved her the first season, then they threw her into "pity me, pity me, I have been hurt so much, blah blah blah" stuff she became incredibly annoying and weak. Now she is a beast! I'm loving me some Tara! And with Pam = GENIUS!



Also, Terry is another character they are devoloping nicely. Being a former soldier myself I TOTALLY dig and get what's happening with him. It's kinda difficult for me to watch his scenes (but that's for other person reasons). But the character is developing so quickly, I love it.



The show as a whole has increased in everything from story, direction and acting. Love me some true blood!
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I loved this episode it was very entertaining but I think I speak for everybody when I say Hoyt is a pathetic waste of life honestly I cringe every-time I see him either he needs to die or get some sort of epiphany. Oh and that Eric glamours Alcide scene was very Homo-erotic.
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Hoyt sucks overall, but he's in good company. Jason, Sookie, Sam, Luna, Tara (maybe not juuuust right now), Andy, Terry, The Authority, the methwolves, the werepanthers. His death or epiphany wouldn't be much more than sneezing at a forest fire.
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* I think it would be interesting to know who killed Sookie's parents. Probably will turn out to be Bill. I remember a reference that he and the Queen (he ended up killing) knew who she was and that's how Bill came about his encounter outside Merlotte's when he "saved" her in episode one. Maybe that's what triggered them to her...



*I think the werewolf mother-in-law might be behind the anti-sup group.



* Yes, I would let Eric gingerly rub his blood or anything for that matter on ANYTHING on my body!!!



* Lillith...don't know, don't care....
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I was also thinking that maybe grandma Martha might have sent folks to off Sam & Luna so she could adopt Emma without any trouble. That lady is hard-core.

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Am I the only one who loves Andy? I don't care, he's great. This show is getting kinda confusing, but I am watching for sake of habit. Really upset about Frank from Raising Hope's death. He is so fun to watch! So is Christopher Meloni, so he better not be dead dead. I also love Hoyt, but feel his worth is running out. Sorry buddy!
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Andy is at least OK as a character, especially when he hangs out with Jason. And the show clearly needs a character in Andy's position (law enforcement, working with Jason). The hate for Andy that we've seen from the tv.com staff is just silly.
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Roman is dead, I don't get why people keep saying that he is alive. HBO behind the scenes commentary on this episode confirmed that he is dead. Chris Meloni even confirmed that Roman died.



Just because he didn't explode does not mean that he's alive.
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Hm, maybe the "melting" was a way of showing us that older vampires don't react as strongly to the wood. If that was the idea, we will probably see Lilith get staked and not die.
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Thanks for that info. One thing this place needs is that guy that reads ahead and spoils our dialogues and thought processes with crap that hasn't happened yet. It's almost as if we can just skip this place entirely and just subscribe to the shows' official webpages and actors' "I'm dead" tweets.



That's what tv.com needs: irrelevance.
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That can be annoying, but this guy is just explaining something that the TV show has already tried to tell us (perhaps unsuccessfully), not something that it's going to tell us in the future.
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I wouldn't say that. I'd say that the uncertainty of Roman's death was both something that was poorly shown (apparently ancient vampires die like a TVD vampire when they're staked) and something that could've been discussed until the next episode. The future. When a show leaves a loose end for next week, let next week cover it.



In fact, people like him go to places like 'Behind the Scenes' to get exactly the explanations to questions he's judging the rest of us for discussing.
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Who doesnt like Andy hes like a live action cartoon character.
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I can never decide which show is gayer, this or Teen Wolf. I only know both shows are fighting damn hard this year for the title. That Eric/Alcide sangro...eroticism? I have a yaoi friend whose head almost exploded over that. Teen Wolf has a gay club, but True Blood has a tacky titty bar with no titties, tacky or otherwise. I hate those damn faeries so much.



But yeah, Bill was pretending to glamour Sookie. It was supposed to be a heartfelt goodbye from a probably-doomed vampire to the idiot faerie he loved. My GF doesn't watch this anymore, but without her backup on this, I'm pretty sure that's what the moment was going for. C'mon, Price.



I'm glad Tara and Jessica didn't end up hugging it out after the fight, but I wish Pam had let it go on longer. I thought Jason would be the dumbass tangled up in yet another "Die Fangers" arc, but it might be Hoyt? It at least doesn't sound *less* interesting.



I enjoyed all of the episode involving Russell, even if he comes with methwolves. He's pretty much the only thing I liked about Season 3. It was nice thinking how much I was enjoying the episode until the other stories started rolling in.



I'm not sure Roman's dead, only because I want him dead so badly. They went through a lot of trouble to not have him explode in a puddle of blood, and I just don't have a good feeling about it. At least Russell's alive.



I love La-La's mom. I'll take anything to make Lafayette a little fun again instead of the quivering pussy he's been for at least a good year now.



And obviously Sam can't die, but they surprised me by keeping Luna around. The story wasn't resolved, but that doesn't seem to bother True Blood. It's really uninteresting when uninteresting story lines start to merge, so it'll be very uninteresting when Sam and Andy's story collides with Hoyt and somehow involves Alcide and his methwolves.



I guess that's it. There were other things, but I just don't care. Russell's still alive, and still badass. That'll have to do.
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Anyone think the if vamps did kill the Stackhouse parents it might have been bill didn't he alreay know that sookie was a fairy when he first meet her, wasn't he on a mission from the queen or something
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I was wondering given the Dawn timeline, how Russell, Bill and Eric were all going to come out alive, because let be real no one actually thought they would die. But I didn't expected Roman to die
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1) Nope, don't think we've seen Lillith yet

2) Not really

3) Don't care

4) Seriously, just give me Eric and Alcide and I can die happy :)
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Ok, I have to address your slightly snide comments about mountains in Louisiana. No, it's flat, but if you had been paying attention last week you would have known they went to the Dakotas to find the other ex-soldier with PTSD who then got burned up by the smoke monster, an idea clearly stolen from Game of Thrones, among other shows. Also, everyone knows that Sookie cannot be glamoured but the Authority guy couldn't have known that so she faked it so they wouldn't kill her and Alcide. I thought everyone knew that. The show's been on five season now and you didn't know? Okay.... As for quality, this was actually almost the best episode so far this season, and I thoroughly enjoyed it, except for the untimely exit of the wonderful Chris Meloni, that is. That totally blows, (a phrase I never use). I was looking forward to enjoying his presence for the rest of the season at least. We found out almost nothing about him, the Authority, why he was called Guardian and so much more. I do hope this mysterious situation between the Authority and these Sanguinistas, whatever they are and whatever they do, is cleared up fairly soon because I'm getting pretty frustrated by the vagueness of the whole storyline, and the death of Roman/Chris won't help.
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How can you say the smoke monster idea is stolen from Game of Thrones?? If you are going to accuse TB of stealing, recognize that Game of Thrones - the books and show - have "borrowed" ideas from a crap-ton of other sources. And LOST will always be the origin of all tv-based smoke monsters!!! Viva Locke!
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And if we're talking about stealing/copying... Can we talk about how True Blood basically copied the plot line w/ Lillith from Supernatural? They even typecast one of the actors who played a pivotal/similar role in the the show. I was def a bit disappointed when they first went on and on about this whole Vampire Bible and Lillith being the end all since that's basically *SPOILER ALERT* what she was in Supernatural -__-.
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Yeh, I'm surprised that after X years people don't recall the fact that Sookie cannot be glamoured. And they were just faking it.



Obviously the Authority didn't, they probably want to keep her "special-ness" on the down-low. Heck, he even told the Authority guy that she was there by accident because they needed the van and the guy.
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Ifrits are totally a thing, stolen from Arabic folklore, not television shows. And the awful Chris Meloni overstayed his welcome by 100% of the episodes he was in. His death was the best part of the episode, and the second best part of the season, just after the kidsplosion.
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Uhh Sookie can't be glamored. They were just pretending. That really wasn't a big secret. But anyway, I agree the aware for best entrance goes to Alcide. :3 Although the best line in the episode goes to Eric who said: "Lilith can blow me."



Eric glamoring Alcide was the best part of the episode. Alcide looked so dumb but damn was that hot!



I'm very disappointed because Claude the faerie is supposed to run a male strip club and they have the nerve to give us this cheesy excuse for a Moulin Rouge club! I want to see some hot men strip! Is that too much to ask for???



I hope Claude's face is okay



Poor Terry Although the part where he and Patrick were running away from the ifrit and they were throwing curse words back at each other was funny.



LOVE RUBY JEAN!!!



Ew Hoyt Would someone please tell him My Chemical Romance wants their clothes back



Emma as a little wolf puppy is too cute for words! Forget her human form she should stay as a wolf all the time!



Ironically the shifter murders are the closest plotline to the book



Roman can't be dead yet! Chris Meloni is such an amazing actor I want to seem him do more! He needs to have a blood orgy!!



1. I don't believe we've met Lilith already.



2. No not really



3. Some redneck hicks



4. Eric can just rub his hands all over me period. X3

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What happened to the Stackhouse parents will probably play into the slow-reveal about the Faeries vs the Vampires history. No idea about Lilith, but wouldn't it be fun if it was intertwined with the Fareries vs Vamps history.
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Didn't watch it. But just from the review. I am going to say that it was Russell Edgington himself that killed Sookie and Jason's parents. Since he and well I think Bill and now Jessica are seemingly the only ones that can smell the fairies. It kind of limits the people that it could be. And I think the person in the photo is wearing a Fedora and that seems like a Edgington thing to do. And he seems to be obsessed with Sookie, so that would kind of explain it.
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I care more about the ultimate fate of the Ifrit than I do about the fate of Sookie's parents. I really hope he/she/it wins out over the fry cook and his sidekick. #teamifrit
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XD I don't think Roman is dead... <.< I honestly would be sad if he did die... Christopher Meloni is awesome!! XD But I was gasping in shock and fear towards the end of the episode... Fucking Russell Edgington, just die already!!
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He's dead, his face warped and his blood got onto Russell. HBO confirmed that Roman is dead, so did Meloni..
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