South Park returns for the second half of Season 13 tonight, making it the perfect time to revisit our favorite 13 episodes of the crude comedy. Fake robots, chili cook-offs, and pot-smoking towels? Yep, all here!
Any chance to make fun of Jennifer Lopez AND have Cartman give Ben Affleck an HJ is okay with me. Taco-flavored kisses for my Ben!
12. Towelie(Season 5)
"Don't forget to bring a towel!" "Wanna get high?" "I'm so high, I don't even know what's going on." Irresponsible? Probably. Hilarious? Absolutely.
Furry little forest creatures who just happen to worship Satan? Adorable!
10. Major Boobage(Season 12)
No one looked at their cat the same way after watching this Heavy Metal parody. Kenny uses cat pee to trip away to every kid's dream: a land of fantasy and large breasts.
Jimmy turns to steroids to win the Special Olympics, but beats up his girlfriend in a fit of 'roid rage. Cartman pretends to be "special" to win the $1,000 cash prize. Priceless. Morally bankrupt, offensive on all fronts, and revolting, but priceless.
8. AWESOM-O(Season 8)
Cartman pretends to be Butters' robot friend in order to keep a secret safe, but ends up under a cardboard box for much longer than he intended. In the end, he pitches ideas for Adam Sandler movies and almost gets molested by a Hollywood executive.
7. Casa Bonita(Season 7)
Cliff diving! A cave with pirate treasure! A puppet show! Mariachis! Sopapillas! Juvenile Hall! And what makes this episode even better is Casa Bonita is real.
Cartman discovers Tourette's syndrome, and sees it as a way to curse whenever he wants. Then the s*** hits the fan.
My PSP is merely a paperweight now, but Kenny's turns out to be a weapon of God. Trey and Matt tackle the Terry Schiavo case in this episode, with Kenny turning into a vegetable and saving the world after the plug is pulled on his life-support machines.
It's Care Bears vs. the Orcs from Lord of the Rings! Strawberry Shortcake vs. the Woodland Critters! It's good vs. evil in this three-episode epic. But the best part? The goofy song one must sing to get to Imaginationland.
When the boys find some martial arts weapons, they turn into anime-style ninjas. Of course, Butters takes the brunt of the damage, suffering a ninja star in the eye, dog pee on his arms, and puppy poop all over.
Trey and Matt go after online gaming in this episode, which features in-game graphics and l33t speak from World of Warcraft, one of the greatest dangers to a functional society.
After purchasing pubic hair from a ninth-grader to enter manhood, Cartman's best revenge ever involves a fellating horse, a chili cook-off, and Radiohead. The tears taste soooooooo good.
The second-half of South Park's 13th season premieres tonight at 10 pm on Comedy Central.