TV.com's Swell-o-vision vs. Hell-o-vision (February 25)

Are you ready for the Oscars!?!? The Academy Awards!?!? The validation that taking a role as a silent-film star was worth it!?!? Well if you like awards shows, you'll love this! It's a weekly awards show where we hand out trophies to everything we liked and didn't like on TV. So Free Tibet, Darfur, and whoever else, and check out this week's Swells and Hells. We promise not to play you off with orchestral music.


SWELL


Stephen Colbert returns to the Colbert Nation


For those who didn’t know he was gone, he took a brief leave of absence from The Colbert Report to take care of his sick 91-year-old mother (aww, what a guy). But things are better, and he's back.



Adele's M.I.A. moment



She'd barely gotten started when some bloke told her to get off the stage so Blur could play a song at the Brit Awards. You cut her off, she'll flip you off.



Triumph's appearance at a stupid awards show


Apparently there's an awards show for dogs in Hollywood. So Conan's Triumph the Insult Comic Dog showed up and gave it the proper leg-humping it deserved.



The return of Kenny MF'n Powers


Sunday's Season 3 premiere of Eastbound & Down had all the slow-motion, potty-mouthin', and surprisingly emotional moments that we'd forgotten we were missing. We can't believe this is the last season, though!



Schmidt & Cece's Relationship continues to heat up on New Girl


While she still won't let him tell their friends that they're hooking up, his impromptu announcement to a Chinese restaurant full of strangers gave us just enough thrills to keep on rooting for this unlikely pair.



The Observers' virtual hangout room on Fringe


In this week's Fringe, "The End of All Things," Peter stepped into September's mind, a trippy den of psychedelic visuals and Christmas Carol-esque footage of Peter's life. The result was a mind-opening, eye-blowing scene where big secrets were revealed. Pass the bong, man!



Standout pilot casting for future thrillers


ABC's Last Resort, about the crew of a nuclear sub that starts its own independent nation after refusing orders to launch missiles, has cast Andre Braugher, Dichen Lachman, and Autumn Reeser. NBC's Midnight Sun, about a cult that goes missing in the arctic, has booked Michael Raymond-James and Titus Welliver. Them's some good casting there!



Ray isn't really paralyzed on Archer


"Bloody Ferlin" wasn't Archer's best episode ever, but we loved the revelation that Ray's been faking his non-working legs for half a season.


HELL


Alcatraz doesn't even know how to spell the city it takes place in


Here's a little bit of advice: If you are going set your TV show in a world-famous city, it might be a good idea to double-check how to spell that city's name. Even if it's something as obvious as S-A-N-F-R-A-N-C-I-S-C-O. But Alcatraz not only misspelled it in three instances, it also spelled it two different ways, both of them wrong. And while we're at it, the Oakland airport has its own airport code (OAK). So much FAIL here, Alkitraz. There! How does it feel?



Is Top Chef: Texas STILL isn't over yet?


Call us antsy, but is a three-episode finale really necessary?



Survivor: One World's Colton


The flamboyantly gay Republican caricature known as Colton—who refuses to talk to his male teammates while also weeping in front of the women's tribe for no reason—has so far provided a chilling suggestion that whoops, maybe it doesn't get better?



Apple's "Rock God" iPhone commercial


It's been airing constantly for the last couple weeks. Not only is the kid intolerable, but it's also a legitimate reason for the machines to rise against us. How about you stop playing Blink 182 songs and hit the books so you don't fail English, guy?


What made your list of TV loves and hates this week?

Comments (42)
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Swell: The Office actually made me laugh hard this week. well done Dwight.
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that iPhone commercial annoys me so much, I roll my eyes at the end everytime and zone out if it's possible.. there's a funny spoof of it,



WARNING: LANGUAGE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31do3YdgeB4&feature=player_embedded
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" How about you stop playing Blink 182 songs and hit the books so you don't fail English, guy?"

Well said sir, well said!
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I totally missed the Alcatraz misspellings. Nice catch!



I did indeed like that Ray had been faking his paralyzation -- quite funny -- but it was a mistake to cast 'Kenneth' as Ferlin.
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Did Alcatraz really do that?!! lol! Can't believe I wasn't paying attention...
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i'm not your friend, buddy!
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I'm not your guy, friend!
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Colbert's return on Monday was indeed classy and funny and clever. That said, I'll add to SWELL his Thursday segment devoted to explaining a memo he got from a sponsor - possibly his finest work, I watched it twice in a row.



Nice call-out on Ray's wheelchair accessory, I loved how he explained it too.



YES! That stupid rock god commercial deserves a painful death!



I still say The Simpsons' 500th episode being a crappy generic regular episode is HELL after this season showed so much promise getting itself together.
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what needs to be on the list? how about COMMUNITY GETTING A RETURN DATE?
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Yes!
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Alcatraz hell because it can't spell, but you can't form a real sentence when you talk about Top Chef: Texas? hehe :)



.... But I agree. Sarah, Lindsay and Paul are the most boring final three ever. I love that the judges doesn't take who viewers love the most into consideration, but sometimes that leaves us with very boring people at the end.
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SPARTACUS needs to be on this list ! EPIC FAIL
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Couldn't agree more!



Episode five may just be the most exhilarating hour of tv ever made!
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spoken like a true Deadwood fan ! love the pic by the way! man oh man do i miss that show as well!
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Maybe Alcatraz trying to copy Fringe, all the mistakes is not actually mistakes, but they're just from another universe
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I was ready to choke a bitch after that ipod commercial.
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No one gives and love the The Gifted Man????
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I love "A Gifted Man"
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hell is anything about New Girl, Adele ( a younger but the same as the old brit lady singer), and anything Reality!!!

Colbert rocks and thats why the Nation loves him!

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OMG Graham Coxon came back to play with Blur at the 2012 Brit Awards?! O.o I can't breathe... that's like EPIC!
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On my Swell list would be this weeks episode of Parenthood (Jasmine and Crosby! Baby drama!), and the announcement of the retun of Community, of course.
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Just don't call it Frisco.



My little TV joys this week: The second part of a thrilling Castle, Jamie Lee Curtis is a competent foil for Gibbs on NCIS, very good episodes of 30 Rock and The Office and a really good Who Do You Think You Are with Blair Underwood. And my highlight, Amazon had all 7 seasons of Boy Meets World on sale, allowing me to complete my collection.
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I spell "San Francisquo" with a QU.
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Gotta love a good Community reference.
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lol Thanks. I was wondering if anyone would get it...
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Interesting points, fun to read through them
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What ? i always though it was San Fransisqo .. Just Kidding !
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Does anyone else think that the story for Alcatraz might have once been the rejected script for an episode of Fringe?? Think about it. What if Alcatraz was based in the "alternate" universe where San Francisco is spelled that way. David Robert Jones might be using Observer technology to bring back the inmates from 1963.

J.J Abrams has literally fried my brain.
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The only Swell for me this week is the swelling on my forehead after I accidentally head-butted my wall while jumping for joy at Community's impending return.
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Swell: "Community" gets a return date and and "Whitney" and "Chelsea" are proven as failures of the multi-camera paradigm.
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Swell: COMMUNITY!!!!
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Swell: FRINGE!!!!!!! and that you included it

Hell: I have to wait for weeks to find out what happens next. How am I supposed to survive.
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Ah Alcatraz, I am so glad I have stopped watching you. That is pretty sloppy. How is anyone supposed to take your "story" seriously if you cant even get the little things right.



As for Swell, I would also like to add Raylan's return to badassary this week. And Winona though will be missed, is gone and can stop making Raylan slip in his duties. Ley angry Raylan loose.



Swell, New girl had a good episode for once. 1 out of 14 isn't bad. Well it kind of is. But at least it is a start.

Hell; Lizzy Caplan is off the show. So there needs to be a new reason to watch.



Swell= Kenny MFing Powers.



Hell, Community isn't back on yet. And Whitney and Chelsea are unfortunately still on.
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Hey Mate, fully agree with your assessment of New Girl, Lizzy Caplan was great (as she usually is) but I no longer have a reason to watch now that she's gone.
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Swell: The Walking Dead actually had a good episode &... COMMUNITY'S COMING BACK, COMMUNITY'S COMING BACK, COMMUNITY'S COMING BACK!



Hell: COMMUNITY ISN'T BACK YET!
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I have no respect for whoever wrote thie piece they left off the COMMUNITY IS COMING BACK NEWS! That was the single greatest thing that happened since the xmas episode!
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Swell- Fringe Fringe and Fringe

Hell- Glee finale. Seriously.
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new girl is getting to be a bit like how i met you mother, you want the main character to move out of the way and get to the others, barney,lily way more fun than ted, same with new girl, the schmidt. cecd thing, nicks epic breakdowns, the only place jess gets the good stuff is in the title sequence
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Lol Adele gave him the finger!
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Alcatraz, WTF? That is really embarrassing. If you didn't question the competence of the writers already, it's mistakes like these that make you do so.
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