's Swell-o-vision vs. Hell-o-vision (January 22)

We hope the United States Holiday Committee opts to add a few more national holidays to our schedule, because it's Friday already, and that's sweet. How about Lost Day, where we all take the day off after the season premiere to discuss theories, eat boar-gers, and put on fake beards? Or Snooki Day, where we all sleep in until three in the afternoon and do Jell-O shots? Or Jeff Zucker Week, where we don't do any real work at all for six years? Just a thought.

One-day Work Week

Conan's million-dollar sketches
Sure, they're fake, but they still get Conan O'Brien's message across. And that message is "I don't particularly care for you, NBC."

Reliving the classic rock days of Supernatural on TNT
Supernatural has the best soundtrack of any show on television, but increasing licensing fees and lower budgets have dried up the producers' use of guitar-y jams. Thankfully, TNT is airing the show from the beginning (set your Tivos!), and once again hearing "Don't Fear the Reaper" during the excellent episode "Faith" is 10 kinds of kick-ass.

Chuck's new guests
Brandon Routh and Angie Harmon have slipped into the spy comedy admirably. Especially big props go to Routh.

Sheldon SMASH! (hopes of hookup)
A woman threw herself at a Hulk-hands-wearing Sheldon on Monday's episode of The Big Bang Theory, but TV's best nerd simply fist-bumped himself and said, "Good night, puny human!"

Impending blood, guts, and sex on Spartacus
Starz's new series makes Rome look like a kid's program. The heart of the show may not be that great, but it sure will be pumping out a lot of blood. Says one critic, "One warrior rips off the face of another and wears it as a mask to his next fight." Pass the popcorn.

Unpaid Overtime

Julianne Moore on 30 Rock. Again.
We chuckled at first, but now we want to rip her tongue out of her mouth so we don't have to listen to that wickedly unawesome Boston accent.

The Office's retrospective clips episode
Just plain lazy. (For the record, at least one staffer here thought it was great.)

Kristin Chenoweth on American Idol
We love her to death, but what was the point of having her on the show if she was just going to sit there and giggle?

MTV's unseen footage on the Jersey Shore reunion show
The network only aired this trash-from-the-past to get Ronnie and Sammi to fight. And Julissa, or whatever the hostess' name was, was licking the bathroom floor trying to provoke some response. You happy now, MTV? Now they may not find true love!

ABC's The Deep End

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