TV.com's Swell-o-vision vs. Hell-o-vision
(March 17)

Mid-March can only mean one thing: March Madness! To be followed shortly by March Anger, March Despair, and March Depression as your NCAA College Basketball Championship bracket fills up with red. Here's our first round of winners and losers for this week in TV.


SWELL


The Walking Dead says "Kill 'em all!"


It's a zombie kind of world, so yes, people are expected to die. And lately they've been dropping like flies. Two big deaths in two weeks means this show ain't playing around. Plus, there are rumors that more fatalities are coming in this Sunday's Season 2 finale. Obvious metaphor alert:  The Walking Dead is most certainly back from the dead.



My Strange Addiction hits a new low


This show is going places no show has gone before. Someone needs to sit this woman down and say, "You're in trouble." To which she'll probably reply, "What are you talking about? I don't have any urine trouble!"



Dallas Royce's crystal bust of Joy Behar on Suburgatory


Dallas's one-on-one with her crystal bust of Joy Behar was one of the most enchanting openings Suburgatory has given us yet. Somebody crack open a window!



Idol's Joshua Ledet tears the roof down in a nice way


For a couple minutes we forgot the karaoke-ness of American Idol, as Ledet had his star moment with a searing performance of "When A Man Loves A Woman." He even casually slipped off his jacket halfway through and added some quick James Brown "ha!"s at the end to seal the deal.



Alex's Miracle speech on Happy Endings


Combining Kurt Russel's speech with one from The Goonies was as adorable as it was out of context. "She's having a tiny stroke!"



EW's Game of Thrones cast portraits


Not to mention Dany and her dragon on one of the magazine's four covers. HBO's excellent fantasy epic has gone mainstream, and we're not complaining. 



30 Rock's Settlers of Catan sendup


This show has really started to challenge The Big Bang Theory's monopoly on nerd references.



Archer heads to space, forces Cyril to eat vomit


Well of course Sterling Archer would ride Cyril like a dolphin and force his mouth open so Lana's barf would float into his pie hole in zero-G! Great start to the two-part season finale, which features Breaking Bad's Bryan Cranston as a guest voice.


HELL


The Bachelor's finale


We all knew Ben would pick Courtney, but did ABC  have to drag it out as if he might not for as long as it did with an endless assault of "I'm on a balcony thinking about stuff" shots? Also, the fact that Ben and Courtney couldn't even keep it together during Chris Harrison's "After the Final Rose" special destroyed any possible sprig of hope that the "love" expressed on this series holds any validity. 



American Idol's public execution


Mothball-scented American Idol producers Nigel Lythgoe and Ken Warwick made the nauseating decision to confront contestant Jermaine Jones on camera about the outstanding warrants and criminal record he failed to disclose, then disqualified the gentle giant on the air. Awkward, cruel, and completely unnecessary. Welcome to Hollywood, dude!



So many Missing promos!


Watching all of ABC's Missing promos has been exhausting. Ashley Judd is doing all the running, screaming, crying, and plane-chasing, but we're the ones getting worn out.



The Celebrity Apprentice goes hunting (and deservedly loses a sponsor)


We were uber skeeved-out after photos of Trump's creepy son holding up the tail of an elephant as a hunting trophy were released to the public. And so was Camping World, one of The Celebrity Apprentice's sponsors for this season. It rightfully pulled its funding from the series, declaring (hopefully), "Trump, you're FIRED."



Fashion Star


See photo.



Kirk Cameron's hate rally


In light of the former Growing Pains star's recent anti-gay comments, we are forced to come to this conclusion: This guy is looney tunes! We see a run at the Republican presidential nomination in his future. 



Luck's odd cancellation


There was nothing swell about this situation at all. Luck was a great show cut short by horrific, unfortunate tragedies. Just an odd ending to a potentially awesome  long-running series.


What made your list of TV loves and hates this week?

Comments (48)
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I'm not a "Cougar Town" fan, but I "discovered" that little gem by mistake and I have to say it was a hoot. The "Kiss the Girl" scene alone was "Swell" worthy.



"Archer" was great all around, watching Lana act useless for once. Tiny Mallory in a large Space Suit. Pam and Cheryl/Carol once again acting as stow-a-ways. A bit "puke" heavy but otherwise solid.
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Hell-O-Vision SyFy's Leprechaun's Revenge. Seriously just atrocious and probably the worst part was the story of how the daughter's mother died or was "lost". Oh Billy Zane, from Titanic co-star to scrap heap. Sad :(
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Swell: Spartacus; Always. Every week. Spartacus.



Hell: No new review because the reviewer, thus far, can't take criticism. The show deserves better.
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I'm sure he could take criticism -- you cant become a critic of sorts without being able to take criticism. But many of the comments on his articles were whiny "stop writing these reviews!" and "why can't someone else write these!" type of comments, which I'm guessing are what convinced him to stop.
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It's a shame about Kirk Cameron. I had no idea he was spouting the kind of nonsense he's evidently been spouting for some time now. And here I thought he just died quietly from celebrity life. Bigotry is bigotry, regardless of your beliefs.
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He once said that a great way to push religion was to "circumnavigate" a person's intellect. How brilliant...
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Swell: COMMUNITY's back! Hell: No Parks and Rec!
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Kirk Cameron has been doing his thing for years on the Christian TBN (Trinity Broadcasting Network). He was on this show where the guys go around confronting people about Christian stuff. They tried to bring a chimp on a plane ("according to evolution, we're cousins!") and they made college students cry by reminding them that their fornication is going to send them to hell. I know the real Kirk Cameron and now so does everyone else.
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Everyone is entitled to his opinion, but I think you're Kirk Cameron comments are over the line. Like Kirk, I am a Christian and believe homosexuality to be a sin. That doesn't make me hate filled, any more than believing bigotry or adultery to be sins. And the comment about a Republican run in his future was very over the line. Way to alienate your audience, dude.
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Actually, I think the Republican comment was bang on -- a lot of Republicans do indeed spout the same rubbish, or similar stuff, that Cameron does and actually get support for it.



That said, I do agree that a writer using the comment on a thread is going to alienate his/her audience to an extent.
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You're welcome to believe that homosexuality is a sin, but bigotry against sinners is still bigotry, and to not acknowledge the fact that republican leaders tend to be bigots would just be disingenuous. Both political parties have sinning as part of their party platform, they just favor different sins.
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Smorbie, I think you're demeaning the concept of "sin" just a little bit to befit your own image. Maybe you don't personally believe gays deserve to go to hell. Well done, that's humane. But your God does. He labels it as a sin. A sin, and the acknowledgment thereof, is no small to-do. In your creed, this is eternal damnation. This is what you believe. And if you don't, then you believe men should marry men, and women just the same. This isn't exactly the same deal heterosexuals get, assuming we're all born sinners. So heterosexuals are allowed to repent and accept Christ, but not homosexuals? They're damned? Anyway, the point is, because you align yourself with a stringent and stubborn doctrine, you're belief system is bigoted by association. However, it doesn't take away from your obvious humanitarian efforts, which I applaud.
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I am certainly not bigoted against homosexuals. I have friends and relatives who are gay, and I spent many, many years working in the fight against AIDS. People are people, all of us, and no one is advocating bigotry. As Christians we are taught that we are all sinners and come short of the glory of God. But to label a sin as a sin is not bigotry. It is acknowledgment of a kind of sin.
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You misunderstand me. Labeling a sin a sin isn't a sin, but saying this is "Because our children's future is best preserved within the traditional understanding of marriage, we call for a constitutional amendment that fully protects marriage as a union of a man and a woman, so that judges cannot make other arrangements equivalent to it. " That's bigotry, friend.
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well if anything, he couldn't say enough.. I do hope that audience would be alienated from everywhere..
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Anything Game of Thrones swells..... Less than 3 weeks to go....
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Yeah , how did The Scrub reunion especially the The Blanks on Cougar Town not get a swell. The Blank version of Kiss the Girl is a swell in itself. What worse is that you gave Archer making Cyril eat vomit a swell. I guess you guys perfer sick jokes over true moments of humor.



Just because someone disagrees with the homosexual lifestyle doesn't means they hate homosexuals. Theres a difference between the two that is so often ignored. Hate implies something more than disagreeing with something. or someone. To just imply that someone hates homosexuals just because they think their lifestyle is wrong takes away the real power of the word , when there is really hate going on. So sad that the writer is so blinded by his bias . Please Stick to talking about TV and leave your politics at home !!!!!!!!!





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I kinda expected only 1 Swell this week: The return of Community.
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Swell: Rachel Maddow's report on Republican efforts at the state level to restrict abortion. Hell: Louis Black on Countdown and Rachel Maddow - In theory, Black reacting to things in the news sounds great, but having him respond to the hosts' question seemed overly subdued; Laurence O'Donnell and Rachel Maddow chuckling about the Republicans having a three way in Mississippi as if they were on Comedy Central; Cenk Ugar trying to tie Morgan Spurlock's documentary on Comic Con into politics.
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Haha...Community didn't make the list
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"The Blanks" on Cougar Town should have been in the swell category. If not for their awesome version of "Kiss the Girl" then for making the episode at least somewhat tolerable.

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Not just The Blanks (don't get me wrong, The Blanks were the best part);



but don't forget the huge Scrubs reunion with appearances by JD, Elliot, Kelso, Todd, and of course Cougar Town series regular Jordan, and the aforementioned phenomenal performance by all four members of The Blanks!
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TV.com was pretty much the only website that liked Luck. Also, way to patronize the GOP as if we all hate homosexuals. classy.
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Actually, the implication would be that a plurality of the GOP hates homosexuals, not all, and not even a majority, just enough to elect a leader who hates homosexuals.
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I'm fairly sure that was a pretty specific Rick Santorum reference.
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Even if it wasn't, hating homosexualss is literally part of the GOP 2008 party platform. http://www.gop.com/2008Platform/Values.htm#6

The word hate is not actually used because it describes the method of hate in detail instead. [Here is how we will treat gays as though they are not our equals.]
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Also, Avclub, EW and TVGuide. If the shoe fits, I don't know what to tell you
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I can't believe the person Kirk Cameron really is - I had such a crush on him when I grew up watching Growing Pains, it just kills me to see that bubble bursted so rigorously.
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He's always been a radical religious zealot.
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Not always.....it was actually after Growing Pains had ended. He said he was fixing up someone's house and they had TBN always on for some reason, and then he started watching, and then he became assimilated, and now he and TBN are of one mind.
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yeah indeed , luck's cancelation was hell!
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Swell;

I F"ing hate you Space. - Sterling Archer.



Psych making fun of dumb shows like the bachelor and bachelorette.



Ava Becoming Madame of Harlan.



Community coming back.



KIller ballet shoes on Supernatural.



Hell;



Whitney and Chelsea are still on the air.



Pretty much all of Missing.



And because I don't know which category to put it in. So I will call it.



Wait, What.

The Leviathan's are curing cancer? on Supernatural.
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My guess would be that the Leviathans think that humans are cancerous to earth.
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Do guys remember when Community went on hiatus and someone posted a super long:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, and then several people responded with OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO's of their own?



Well, let me be the first to start the YES train: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
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This is like the Mexican wave of the comments section.
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
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It doesn't work if everyone puts exclamation points at the end!!!
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Haha, I was about to say that the exclamation points ruined it.
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Nitpicker!
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John Oliver's report on Thursday's The Daily Show was all kinds of swell
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F'ing Gabon!



Totally seconded! I hadn't heard anything about the U.S cutting funding to UNECSO before John Oliver's report. And what an absolutely ridiculous law they're citing to justify suspending much needed funding to such an admirable organization. It's almost beyond belief.



WRITE YOUR CONGRESSMAN AMERICANS! AND TELL THEM TO RESTORE THEIR FUNDING TO UNESCO!
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Swell: Community is back!

Hell: The Big Bang Theory is not on!

Swell: The Big Bang Theory is not on, so Community has great ratings!

Hell: Community has great ratings, but doesn't put forth one of its stronger efforts!

Swell: Did I mention, Community is back!!!
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Swell: COMMUNITY IS BACK!
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I second that! And they had decent ratings!
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