The small screen is home to many eligible bachelors—How I Met Your Mother's Ted Mosby (Josh Radnor) and The Office's Michael Scott (Steve Carell) come to mind—who yearn to spend Valentine's Day with a special someone. But what about the ineligible bachelors, the men who insist that they'll never give up their one-night stands in favor long-term love? We decided to give them some love... even if they won't commit to it.
10. Tom Haverford (Aziz Ansari) from Parks and Recreation
Tom might still be pining for his green card-seeking ex-wife, Wendy, but unrequited love didn't stop him from hitting up The Glitter Factory, Pawnee's premier strip club. Tom's a ladies' man at heart.
9. Charlie Harper (Charlie Sheen) from Two and a Half Men
Okay, so Charlie is living with his girlfriend. But it took him, like, six seasons to get there. Plus, she's roughly half his age and he still wears those damn bowling shirts. He'll be a bachelor for life.
8. Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) from 30 Rock
Jack has wooed his fair share of beautiful women—Celeste (Edie Falco), Elisa (Salma Hayek), and Nancy (Julianne Moore), to be exact—yet he's still single. Let's hope he's not holding out for Liz Lemon (Tina Fey).
7. Richard Castle (Nathan Fillion) from Castle
With two divorces behind him and a #9 ranking on New York's "10 Most Eligible Bachelors" list, proud playboy Castle isn't looking to settle down any time soon. Unless, of course, it's with Beckett (Stana Katic).
6. Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick) from Gossip Girl
So what if Chuck is dating Blair (Leighton Meester)? He was born a player, and he'll die a player. Hell, he was hanging out in strip clubs—and enjoying the sights—well before he hit puberty. Good luck keeping Chuck on a leash, B.
5. Vincent Chase (Adrian Grenier) from Entourage
His conquests number in the thousands and include Mandy Moore and Carla Gugino. No player I've ever met would quit the game with stats like that.
4. Hank Moody (David Duchovny) from Californication
A long-term girlfriend (Natascha McElhone) and several students on the side? Professor Moody's got it made. If only he could cure that writers' block...
3. Don Draper (Jon Hamm) from Mad Men
Only a true commitment-phobe would cheat on a former model like Betty (January Jones) with a bohemian artist like Midge (Rosemarie DeWitt), an heiress like Rachel (Maggie Siff), a married woman like Bobbie (Melinda McGraw), and a teacher like Miss Farrell (Abigail Spencer).
2. Quagmire (voice of Seth MacFarlane) from Family Guy
He's a registered sex offender, he's got a sex catchphrase ("Giggity giggity goo!"), and he's been known to pick up sexual partners on the side of the road. To say this guy will be single forever is an understatement.
1. Barney Stinson (Neil Patrick Harris) from How I Met Your Mother
The man has a closet full of suits, a playbook full of pickup lines, and a pile of sawdust where his many-notched bedpost used to stand. He's a legendary ladies' man—and the most ineligible bachelor on TV.
Follow TV.com writer Stefanie Lee on Twitter: @StefAtTVDotCom
Comments (35)
Charlie Harper (Charlie Sheen) from Two and a Half Men
I would add Frank from 30 Rock on here. He's next exactly what you would call "a catch". http://iamnoahjames.com/
castle and most likely charlie wont be bachelors for long. but it probably wont take long for charlie to screw it up and end up devorced again.
lol 2 of the people on the list technically aren't technically bachelors since their interested in men not women.
What about Danny Crane? and Allan Shore
What about Ryan Kwanten's character from True Blood? He is much more of a manwhore than Barney Stinson, he will never stop being a redneck player.
What about Moe from the Simpsons!
BARNEY STINSON!!!
BARNEY STINSON! hyeah :))
ANTHONY DINOZZO from NCIS... I would join the navy and play up just to be handcuffed by him!!!
Ill add Magee from NCIS(although he and Abby flirt)Sam from Burn Notice. Fin from Law and Order SVU
Quagmire and Barney may be single, but alone?? Nahhhhh
what about archer?? ARCHER!!
What about House?
Barney FTW !!!
My first thought was Barney and you nailed it. Perhaps Dexter, Christopher Chance, any of the Big Bang Nerds (sans Leonard), the Buy More Nerds, Larry David, Noah Bennet, and any of the himbos from Jersey Shore (don't kid yourself you know they are characters not people...the Situation...need I say more).
i love barney and chuck and castle the rest, ehh they can stay bacholers
When I saw the title of this article I immediatley thought of Lester and Jeff from Chuck, they should really have gotten a spot imo.
Glad to see Barney topping the list! Perfect week was an amazing episode last week =)
The actress that plays Charlie Harper's girlfriend is 7 years younger than Charlie Sheen. Where's the "roughly half his age" thing coming from?
You mean Legen-Wait for it-dary!
Rick Castle clearly plays up, but does not enjoy, his status as wealthy bachelor. He's guarded, but essentially waiting for the right woman to come along. As for Howard on Big Bang Theory, he isn't a bachelor by his own choice. I'd have put season 1 or season 2 Cappie from Greek on the list, but season 3 Cappie doesn't qualify. There is the obvious answer of Christopher Chance of Human Target, though. And Noah Bennett from Heroes.
I'll stop watching 30 rock if they pair up Jack and Liz........that would be more ridiculous than pairing tracy and liz
I would not have put Castle on the list at all, and I think Howard from The Big Bang still qualifies. I think Puck qualifies as well from Glee even if he does have a major crush on Quinn.
This is a first, I watch half of the shows listed in a TV.com article.
i would add Rajesh Koothrappali (acted by Kunal Nayyar) ... the dude from big bang theory ... i would've put Howard first but somehow he has a gf now....
thanks, ZakAlami!--stefanie
It's Harper not Parker!
Charlie Harper not "Parker"
Quagmire...
Giggity giggity goo!!!
Oh come on, what about the Jeff and Lester double act on Chuck? They must be the two creepiest guys on TV (Jeff's antics alone should place him high on the list).
I'd take Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick) off this list, he and Blair are awesome together. Also isn't Charlie's last name "Harper" not "Parker"?
Not bad of a list.
This list isnt that bad.